“That simply is not true.” Darshan’s hand slid down Hamish’s arm to link their fingers. “And you do have something. You have me.”
I do. Even having nothing beyond his name—and he wasn’t even sure if he could still lay claim to half of it—Darshan would still be there. And his. “You dinnae gain anything by marrying me that you dinnae already have. There’s nae even a dowry. It’s just me.” He could hope all he wanted that none of it mattered, but it did. It always would.
Soft amusement huffed out his lover’s nose. “Do not sell yourself short, mea lux. You is more than enough. And dowries are to placate parents. I am not usually one to brag, but my father is already a very wealthy man.”
He didn’t know where the chuckle that escaped his lips came from, but it carried little in the way of mirth. “What good am I to you besides the obvious? I cannae be an ambassador to a kingdom who sees me as dead and you already have me willing enough to warm your bed.”
Indignance tightened Darshan’s features. “Do you honestly think I would have put myself through those trials if you meant no more to me than a place to stick it?”
Hamish shook his head. “I ken exactly why you competed. But me mum’s disownment invalidates the contest.” If Darshan had been a Tirglasian noble, such an act would’ve led to a feud between their clans.
“Meaning no binding claim to your hand should I change my mind?” Darshan scrubbed at his face and Hamish caught the mumbled words, “What is it about me that has people rejecting my offers of marriage? I am certain I have more than enough credentials to make me a good catch.”
“You…” Hamish peered at him. “You’ve suggested marriage to someone in the past?” That sounded like something the man should’ve mentioned before now.
“Under vastly different circumstances, I assure you. I hardly think you would consider her as a threat to my affections.”
“Her? Dar—”
Darshan waved his hand. “It was not one of my finest moments, but Rashmika is an old friend and I was trying to help her out of a dangerous situation. Her father was a rather influential man. He convinced my father to train her as my sister’s handmaiden.” He scrunched his nose, the act disturbing his glasses. “Her father used to beat her. Her magic healed the bruises, of course, but it was there in her eyes. I was just a young man, barely eighteen. Marrying me would have kept her safe. Just like it would keep you safe.”
“And why would you need to be concerned about me safety?” Wasn’t being at Darshan side enough for the Udynean people?
“Bringing you into the Crystal Court will upset quite a few people. Being a member of the royal household, even through marriage, comes with a certain level of protection from those not of our family.”
Hamish’s thoughts drifted to the scar on Darshan’s torso. An arrow wound given to him by his own half-sister. “And what about those within your family clan?”
Darshan hummed noncommittally. “Most will fall into line immediately. Those who do not—” He shrugged. “Their actions would largely depend on my father’s feelings over all this. Marriage to a Mhanek, or even his heir, is forever.”
And yet, he had almost thrown away any chance of marrying for love. “Is that why this Rashmika woman refused you?”
His lover nodded. “She knew my reasoning, knew I had no physical interest in her. That, had I wed her, only her death would have freed my hand for another.” One side of his mouth lifted. “She is happily married now, to a cousin on my mother’s side of the family. I believe they even have children.”
“And how do you think your father will take the idea of marrying me? Especially with how you plan to make bairns?” He couldn’t imagine the Mhanek being at all happy about the trade and alliance deals falling through, but maybe he would be placated by the idea of a grandchild from his heir.
Grimacing, his lover sighed. “I honestly wish I knew. Any objections he has should be minor. Hopefully, I can mollify him on the important ones. Everything else?” Again, he shrugged.
“Fair enough,” Hamish mumbled. They were definitely going to need to discuss how they faced Darshan’s father, but it didn’t need to be now and certainly not here. “We should get going.”
Darshan combed back his hair, seemingly composed once again. “In a moment.” Moving with deliberate slowness, he dropped to one knee before Hamish. “I suppose, all things considered…”
Hamish took a step back. “What are you doing?” There was only one reason he could think of for a man to be kneeling before him and they’d hardly the time for anything sexual, nor was this really the place.
“Hopefully, proving how serious I am to retain my claim to your hand.” He grasped Hamish’s fingers, holding them between both hands. “I was going to insist upon this before we reached Udynean borders, but now is just as a good a time.”
Unwilling to reclaim his hand just yet, Hamish He shuffled on the spot. “For what?”
“I am unsure of your people’s customs in regards to a proposal, so I am afraid you shall have to forgive my use of Udynean ones.”
“Pr-proposal?” he managed. “We… we dinnae have…” Tirglasian couples didn’t propose. They made arrangements, sought out the Goddess’ favour and married only once an agreement on children was reached.
All of which Darshan had done.
Sweet Goddess…
How had he not realised that sooner?
“Still, I am only going to ask this once, so it would be less embarrassing for the both of us if you answer
