Pushing past the lump in his throat, he nutted up and asked her, “What did you lie about, sweetheart?”
She glanced down at his chest, refusing to look him in the eye for this part. Definitely not a good sign. Jake held his breath and waited. Please don’t say you regret us, baby.
“About not wanting more,” she whispered.
At first she didn’t say anything else, and he began to question whether he’d even heard right. Then, she looked back up at him and began talking so quickly, her words almost came out in one, long rush.
“I thought I could handle it, us...being together like that. I thought if I had you, even just that one night, it would be enough.”
Her normally strong voice cracked slightly, and the tears beginning to well in her eyes tore at his swelling heart. Before he could respond, she rambled on some more.
“When you left, I thought maybe we really could go back to the way things were before. Like nothing had ever happened.” She shook her head, almost frantically, her words falling out one right after another. “But, I can’t. It’s obvious you don’t feel the same way, and that’s okay. Well, it’s not really okay, but I’ll get over it. It’ll take time, but I know I can move on, and one day we’ll be able to be friends again. Until then, I just...I can’t do this with you, Jake. I can’t.” She licked her lips and straightened her shoulders, drawing on her inner strength. “I won’t be just a...booty call.”
She wanted more? That’s what she’d lied about? Jake’s swollen heart pounded in his chest.
He wanted to do a fist-pump high in the air, or pick her up and swing her around like he’d seen guys do in those cheesy chick flicks.
Olivia Bradshaw wanted more. With him. Hell, yes.
He started to reach for her, but remembered what she’d just said about being a booty call. Shit.
He was really screwing this whole thing up. That was okay, because he was about to fix it, right the hell now.
Cupping her face with his hands, Jake tilted her chin up. He looked her square in the eyes as he spoke.
“Let me make something very clear. I would never, ever come to you for a booty call.” He kissed her softly, his lips brushing against hers when he spoke again. “Not with you, Liv. Never with you.”
Olivia’s throat moved, and her eyes glistened. “It’s just too hard, Jake. I know you don’t feel the same way about me, but that’s my problem, not yours. I’ll...deal with it. Eventually.”
She obviously wasn’t listening. Jake opened his mouth to set her straight, but the stubborn-assed woman wouldn’t let him get a word in edgewise.
“Look, Jake. I get that with your job, you sometimes have to leave at a moment’s notice. I’ve always known that, even when I didn’t know what your job really was. I also understand that whatever you and your team had to do this time was more important than staying with me. And that’s okay, too.”
Olivia stopped to take a breath. Her eyes filled even more, and the tip of her cute-as-fuck button nose turned rosy. She blinked, and a single tear fell.
“It was the fact that, after everything we’d been through together, you didn’t even bother to tell me you had to leave. God, Jake. That’s what hurt the most.” Her chin quivered, and her voice broke. “You never even said goodbye.”
“Ah, sweetheart. Come here.” He pulled her in closely. Wrapping one arm around her waist, he cupped the back of her head and tucked it beneath his chin.
Jake felt her small hands grab the back of his shirt tightly, and he closed his eyes against his own emotions. It took him a full minute before he could talk past the softball-sized lump that had suddenly taken up residency in his throat.
He filled his lungs and prayed for the words to help her understand. Moving back just enough to look her in the eyes, Jake willed her to see the truth behind his.
“Leaving you that day was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.”
Beautiful, tormented eyes stared up into his. “Then, why did you?”
She sounded so small and fragile, making him curse the circumstances behind their two-month separation once again. “I didn’t have a choice. I had to leave with my team.”
“Jason told me you had another job. He said it was important, but I still don’t understand why we couldn’t have talked for a minute before you left. Just long enough to at least say goodbye.” Another tear fell.
He wiped it away before it reached her jaw. “My team and I left that day because we were going after the bastards responsible for your abduction. Time was of the essence, and literally, every second counted. You’d already been taken to the safe house when I found out I had to leave. I couldn’t risk missing the opportunity to catch those assholes. Not even to try to find you to say goodbye. I’m sorry.”
Olivia inhaled deeply, the movements pushing her soft breasts against his chest. Jake forced himself to ignore the way they felt.
Instead, he focused on the way her eyebrows turned inward, the soft skin between them wrinkling together in that adorable way they did. He wanted to kiss them. Focus, McQueen.
“I thought your team killed all of Cetro’s men the day you found me. Well, except the two who took us, but we know for a fact they’re...”
She didn’t finish, which was fine with him. Neither one of them wanted to talk about the circumstances surrounding those two assholes’ deaths. Jake sure as hell didn’t want to think about how close he came to losing her that day.
“I’m not just talking about Cetro and his men, sweetheart. When we left Dallas two months ago, we were also going after the man who hired Cetro to take you.”
Visibly shaken, Olivia
