I moisten my lips. “So, uh, why’s this complicated? I mean, apart from bumping into the Xers.”
Theo rolls his shoulders. “One of the reasons I’ve had such a hard time finding your records is because I have to be extremely careful about how I look for them. A misstep will immediately tip off the Xers. This isn’t an unusual problem, but we do have another, slightly more confusing one. All I could find of your records was your name, birthdate, and social security number. Otherwise, your records are gone. Not redacted. Gone. Digitally speaking, anyway. They don’t even list parents or siblings. I did look up your brother, Cody, but ran into the same problem.”
Kaz’s face contorts with an emotion he closes off too fast for me to read and we both stop at the same time. Whatever that expression meant, it’s no good and my chest craters a little. I’ll have to wait until we’re alone to prod him about it.
“What does that mean?” I ask.
“It could mean a lot of things,” Kaz says, not meeting my eyes. “We need more information before we start making guesses. Were you able to find any physical copies, Theo?”
Theo shakes his head. “I was working on getting those records when I tangled with the Xers. I’m also not ready to give up on the digital one yet. Nothing is ever really gone. Also, if you’ve remembered anything else, that will help Billie.”
His confidence stokes mine a little, and I manage a grin. “Well then, Kaz and I’ll go check out my house, see if that shakes anything loose, and you can keep digging, huh? Once you’re feeling up to it obviously. And add the name Hailey Martin to the list, she was my sister.”
My grin widens as the memory of the ice cream parlor streams back through my mind. Hopefully she hasn’t been sponged out too. Maybe she’s some kind of super anti-Xer spy who had to keep our records private for our protection.
Theo smiles. “Will do. And be careful. The Xers are getting more aggressive lately. I don’t think they know about your house yet, but that doesn’t mean they haven’t sniffed out whose death I’m looking into. That could very well be why they attacked me in Dallas.”
“Don’t worry,” Kaz says. “I’ll take care of Billie.”
In a blink, Kaz and I zip to a city a little outside of Dallas called Flower Mound. I kind of love the name, and not just because I once lived here. It’s earthy and romantic, bringing images to mind of a hill covered in a wild burst of color.
We land on the lawn of a small, ranch style home. Evergreen bushes line the wide front windows and a massive tree reaches its branches over the back fence.
It’s this tree that sparks the life flash.
It starts with me squatting in the front yard with my arms out to catch a toddling child, Cody, then picks up speed. We climb that tree together, snagging peaches from the highest branches we can reach. Sweet juice runs down our arms and stains our clothes. We throw the pits to each other, trying to hit them with sticks.
Hailey paints my nails, teaches me how to drive, helps me learn spells. She holds me after our skiing trip to Virginia where I lost my magic, insisting it will come back.
My parents, a very buttoned up couple who feel like strangers, pop in and out of our lives, gone for long stretches of time. Then one day they don’t come home.
I sit in my room on a pale blue bedspread, knowing I should cry, but feeling so disconnected from them that I simply can’t.
Moving day. As Hailey fills a truck with boxes, the memories slow down, and I remember a conversation on the front steps. Cody sits with his chin in his hands, cheeks red, nose snotty from crying.
“I don’t want to move, Billie,” he says.
Rubbing his shoulders, I make a funny face, sticking out my tongue and crossing my eyes until Cody giggles a little. I take this opening to tickle his sides. Soon, tears of laughter fill his eyes and replace the sadness.
“Hey buddy, I know it’s hard, but it’s going to be okay,” I say. “Hailey and I will take such good care of you. But you know, we’ll need your help making our new apartment home. Think you can do that?”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah? I don’t know if I believe you.”
“Yeah!” Cody shoots his little fists into the air.
Hauling him up over my shoulder, I carry him toward the truck and dump him in the middle seat.
I only half feel myself floating after the car in my memory.
It leads us to the other side of town, where the roofs sag a bit and the asphalt is cracked. When the truck finally stops, it’s in front of a gateless apartment complex. Some windows are patched with duct tape, others protected from the heat and cold with aluminum foil, and most of the railings are chipped or rusted.
But it’s the far building that carves a hole in my chest. One huge section is completely gouged out, blackened by now dead flames.
The truck from my memory pulls up in front of it and my sister, brother, and I all climb out and start carrying the boxes inside.
This was my home for the last few years of my life.
The life flash fades. I reach out for it as if I could actually grab hold of my sister or brother and keep them here. But the memory slips away and I can’t find it again. Everything afterward is completely blank, like the records Theo couldn’t find.
I choke on a sob and sink to my knees a few feet from the stairs. “Where is it? Why do I keep losing it?”
“Talk to me,” Kaz says. “Tell me what you saw.”
Sniffing, I straighten and glare at the burnt out building. “We moved here after our
