“It’d hurt them, Royal.” In the end, he touched me, curling a finger and catching my tears. I shook my head. “It’d pain them so much. Don’t you love them?”
“I do,” he said, the words light and barely heard. They were filled to the brink with emotion and he gazed away.
I brought him back with a touch. “Then you can’t forget. Who will remember the good things if you don’t?”
His dad? The man was already lost to his anger, his hate clearly. I mean, look what he did and was still doing to his son? Royal said he used to be so nice. Maybe even like who my dad used to be before my mom died. Pain brought terrible out in people, but he didn’t need to be like his dad. He didn’t need to be cold and unfeeling to the world.
He braced my face. “I’m scared. Scared to lose them.”
“Then don’t.” I touched his other cheek. “Forgive yourself. Heal and be free. There’s no space for them if you don’t release all this you have pent up and let them through. They’ll leave, and you don’t want that.”
“I don’t.” Agony laced his shaken words, and I pulled my arms around him, tugged him into me.
“I won’t let you forget them,” I told him, holding him close. “You won’t.”
“Promise?” His hands curled into my skin, his mouth in my hair. “I don’t want to forget.”
Then he won’t. He’d get through this pain. He’d let everything but what truly mattered—his sister and his mom—go, and I’d made sure of that.
I’d promise him that.
Twelve
December
My night was filled with lots of tears. Mostly on my end as I finally got Royal to open up and see the truth. Together, we got him to see his truth. He’d been blinded for so long. He’d been in the depths of so much pain both physical and mental. His dad had kept him there, but he wouldn’t anymore. I’d love Royal as harshly and beautifully as he deserved to be loved, with as harsh and beautiful as I knew he loved me. I’d do that, and I’d keep doing it over and over again. Lather, rise, repeat. I’d do it until it sunk in.
I’d do that forever.
We held hands together on a Sunday morning, sitting in his car in the middle of a quiet street. With all downtown businesses closed, it was the perfect time to visit his dad’s jewelry store, end this. I knew that cell phone was somewhere inside that store. I just had a feeling. Eventually, we weren’t alone anymore when another car pulled up right behind us. We parked down the street, discrete. Royal started to let go of my hand, but I held on, kissing it.
Something passed between us as we stared at each other, something deep. I think, for the pair of us, something had changed over these past few days. There was no more me. There was no more Royal Prinze. We were Em and Royal now. We were Royal and Em forever, and I think he saw that too, bending my head forward. He kissed me, whispering words of love before getting out of the car. He told me to wait in the car for a second, and I watched as he walked in his low-sitting jeans to the car parked behind us. He bent his big body and spoke to the person inside, Jax the driver. I could see his friend well through the windshield, but noticed he was very much alone. I assumed LJ and Knight would be here as well.
Seeing me, Jax waved a hand from behind the steering wheel, and I did the same. They spoke for a second, but when my phone buzzed, I broke off from the distant conversation.
Ramses: What’s up, ’Zona? I’m coming home next week, but I thought I’d check in. Haven’t talked to you in a while. You ghostin’ me again? ;)
I actually hadn’t been. At least not on purpose. Oddly enough, I’d barely even noticed I hadn’t seen Ramses since well before Mira’s funeral. I supposed I had other things on my mind.
I snuck a glance into the rearview mirror, Royal and Jax still talking. We’d parked a few blocks away from the jewelry store so we wouldn’t be on the store’s security systems. Apparently, Knight was supposed to be working on that part, but since he wasn’t here, I had no idea what was going on.
Me: I haven’t been ghosting you, idiot. If anything, you’ve been ghosting me.
Ramses: Have not! My dad’s been on this crazy kick. We’re in the Swiss Alps right now. Can you believe that? Took me on a mini holiday.
Me: Wow. Why did he do that?
Ramses: Seems he wants to hang out with me. Says he wants to do it before I head out to college in the fall and life changes. Crazy, right? I guess this little piece of metal on my finger has been good for something. I actually don’t mind spending time with him. He seems to be trying.
That made me smile. Ramses had never said it, but I had a feeling a relationship with his father was something he’d really wanted. Why wouldn’t someone want that?
Ramses: Anyway, like I said, I’m coming home next week. What’s up? School still weird? Crazy about Mira.
School was still weird, but I didn’t really have any time to talk about it now. Royal waved a hand, gesturing for me to come. After sending Ramses a quick follow-up text that I was in the middle of something and would chat with him later, I got out of the car, hunkering down as I made my way to the boys. We were in the
