“Uh . . . We don’t have to get into that now.” Mal crossed his fingers.
“Get into what?” Christ, Dev was like a dog with a boner. Kept humping your leg until he got what he wanted.
“Tell him,” Tash said. Traitor.
Mal sighed. “I met your uncle.”
“That bastard? What did he do to you?”
“No. Not him. Well, yeah, I met him too, but . . . the other one. Jory. He’s younger. And nicer.”
“And?”
Tasha leaned over the bar, eyes bright and her tongue practically hanging out. “And he shagged him, didn’t he?”
Mal groaned. “Cheers, Tash. That’s exactly how I wanted to break it to him.”
Dev stared. “You slept with my uncle? Fuck, bruv, I thought you had some standards.”
“Oi, he’s not like the other one, all right? He’s a good bloke, Jory is.”
“Uh-huh? No offence, but I’m gonna need evidence before I believe that about anyone called Roscarrock.”
“He wants to meet you. Get to know you. And, uh, he’s got a kid. Your cousin.”
Dev’s face had that closed-off expression Mal hadn’t seen for a while. Say, since back when Dev had first met the Roscarrocks. “I got loads of cousins.”
“Yeah, but Gawen’s cool. He’s twelve and he’s really into computer games. Dead bright too.”
“What about his mum?”
“Uh, she’s not so cool. Well, she kinda is, but . . .” Yeah, best not going there. “But they’re divorced. Uh, getting divorced. They’ve been separated since like before he was born.” Mal realised how that might sound to Dev and hurried on. “But Jory didn’t abandon them or nothing. He’s a great dad to Gawen. He’s gonna be a teacher at his school from September.”
“He’s all right, honest,” Tasha put in. “When we was worried about Mal last night, he dropped everything to drive round trying to find him. Despite having reasons not to.” She shot Mal a filthy look which, yeah, he probably deserved.
“Oh yeah? And what was all that about, anyhow?” Dev frowned. “You mean you weren’t joking about having a fall? What you done to yourself?”
“It was only a little one. I’d’ve been fine if the weather hadn’t been so shit.”
“And if you hadn’t been pissed out of your skull,” Tasha put in flatly.
“Cheers, babe.”
“Anytime.”
“Oi, you were out on the piss? On your own?” Dev’s face was darkening in a way that said brace yourself for thunder, lightning, and all four horsemen of the apocalypse.
“I wasn’t on my own!”
Tasha snorted. “Yeah, that was the problem.”
“Was this that Roscarrock bloke?”
“No!”
“That was the problem too.” Tasha made a face. “Him and Jory was on the outs, and this older woman got Mal drunk and took advantage.”
“It wasn’t like that,” Mal protested, cos it really wasn’t fair on Kirsty.
“I tell it like I see it, babe.”
Dev shook his head slowly. “Jesus, you two are doing my head in. Look, just tell me about this bloke. My so-called uncle. Are you and him together or what?”
“Yeah. We sorted it out.” Mal couldn’t help smiling as he thought about Jory.
Dev rolled his eyes. “Right. So now tell me, if he wanted to meet me, how come he never bothered till now?”
“Cos he didn’t know. Swear to God. I didn’t believe it at first, but that brother and sister of his—” Mal realised he was slagging off Dev’s mum and swallowed, but fuck, Dev knew what she was like. “They don’t tell him nothing. And they tried to run his whole life. Treat him like a kid even though he’s in his thirties and he’s got a kid of his own.”
“You can sorta see why they’re all fu—mucked up, though,” Tasha said. “Their dad took a long walk off a short cliff right behind their house.”
Mal shuddered. “Tasha, do something for me, will you? Never volunteer to work for the Samaritans.”
“Fu—stuff you. I’d be brill. And stop changing the subject. You gotta meet him, Dev. Well, you’re gonna anyway, seeing as him and Mal are in lurve.”
“It’s serious, then, you and him?”
Mal shoved his hands in his pockets. “Pretty much. Yeah.”
“So what were you and him on the outs about?”
Aw, fuck. “I told him we couldn’t be together.”
“Because of me?”
“Yeah. No . . . I’ve just been really fucking messed up, you know?”
Dev’s expression went all soppy again, and he gripped Mal’s arm. “Hey, it’s okay, bruv. You got every right to be. But this bloke, he makes you happy, yeah?”
“Yeah. Yeah, he does. Still dunno how it’s gonna work, but . . . we’re gonna give it a go.”
Dev sighed, but he was smiling too. “Guess I’ll be seeing him, then. And oi, none of that,” he added when Mal opened his mouth to say No, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. “It’s like, word of mouth, innit?”
“Uh?”
“’S how we get a lot of business down at the garage. People bring their cars in, they’re happy with our work, so they tell their mates. And then they bring their cars in. So, like, this Roscarrock bloke—”
“Jory,” Mal interrupted.
“—Jory, yeah, he’s like the garage.”
“What, and I’m the car he’s serviced? Cheers, bruv.”
Dev laughed. “You know what I mean. He’s given your engine a good seeing to—”
“Seriously, this metaphor needs to die. It needs to die right now—”
“—and now you’re recommending his services to all your mates.”
“Listen, mate, if you even think about asking Jory to have a poke around under your bonnet—”
Kyle turned up at that point, which was just as well. He looked good—tired, but good. Zelley was a chocolate brown shadow at his heels. Mal bent down to make a fuss of her, with a lot of Who’s a gorgeous girl, then? and that sort of thing. Then he grinned up at Kyle. “Oh, you here and all?”
“Good to see you too,” Kyle said easily. “How have you been, Mal?”
Dev shouldered in as Mal straightened to give Kyle a welcoming hug. “That’s Uncle Mal to you and me now.”
“Have I missed something?” Kyle had his lawyer-look on his face.
“Just a bit,” Tasha said, and cackled.
Mal threw up his hands.
