She was eating with Henry and Pansy every night, and it was getting harder to leave to return to her cold bedroom and lie in bed alone.
She missed them both when she wasn’t with them. The way Pansy would come and talk to her and hold her face sometimes when she needed to make a point.
She missed the way Henry laughed at her jokes and didn’t frown when she used a swear word, making sure to never use one in front of Pansy.
And she missed the conversation. She and Henry could have talked about everything and anything forever she thought. Trying not to compare him to Piles was a daily battle and one she always lost.
It was as though she was more herself than she had ever been and yet she was so far removed from her old life.
Did anyone miss her back in London? Judy hadn’t called, not that she wanted to think about her anymore.
Judy was her past, Giles was her past but were Henry and Pansy her future?
She kept painting as Henry was talking to Pansy in the kitchen. The last time she had painted was with her mum when they left her father for the last time. Her grandmother had said Clara could paint her new bedroom, and Clara had insisted on a buttercup-yellow feature wall, like she had seen in a magazine. So, she said she would paint it but then, like most things, she lost interest and her mum had to finish it off.
That was before that awful night. The last time she saw her father.
She shivered as Henry came back into the hallway. ‘You’re cold? It will be warmer when I get the insulation into the roof, I promise.’
‘It’s okay, just a shiver.’
‘Someone walking over your grave, huh?’ Henry laughed as he left to go back to the roof.
Pansy walked into the hallway, her hands filled with play dough. ‘Daddy said I can go to school next week.’ Her little face looked both pleased and worried.
‘Oh wow, Pansy, that’s amazing. You’re going to love it. I loved school.’
‘Daddy said he will sign me up tomorrow. And I can have ribbons for my hair.’
‘Ribbons are a must. I wonder what colour the uniform is?’
‘Daddy?’ Pansy ran outside and Clara put down the paint roller and followed her. ‘Daddy? What colour is the uniform?’
‘I don’t know,’ said Henry. ‘Clara, I was going to ask if we can use your address for the mail? Just until we get sorted.’
Clara felt like doing a cartwheel similar to the one that Pansy was attempting.
‘Of course, anything you need,’ she said trying to be casual as she wandered back inside and then in the solitude of the hallway she did a little happy dance.
He was staying. Pansy was going to school. He wanted to use her address. God, it was so exciting.
The sound of her phone ringing interrupted her solo dance fest and she fished it from her handbag and answered.
‘Hello? This is Clara.’
‘Clara Maxwell?’
‘Yes?’
‘You brought in Moira Brown last week… umm on Tuesday evening last?’
‘Yes, I did, can I help?’
Clara was looking at the wall, thinking how much better it was looking. It really brightened the area… or was that because she was glowing with happiness at the thought Henry and Pansy were staying forever?
‘We are trying to get on to her daughter, Rachel Brown. We have left several messages but she isn’t returning our calls and we have asked for several things to be dropped off for Mrs Brown but she hasn’t visited either.’
Clara paused.
‘Let me speak to Rachel and find out what’s happening, okay?’
‘Mrs Brown has had a major surgery and is very alone and worried about her daughter. She is facing a lengthy recovery, at least three months in rehabilitation, and then the occupational therapist will have to come and assess the house to see what modifications will have to be made.’
‘She lives above a bakery,’ said Clara. ‘There are stairs – the stairs she fell down.’
‘That’s not for me to assess. That will be the rehab team’s job when Mrs Brown is ready to be released.’
Clara thought for a moment. ‘Let me talk to Mrs Brown’s daughter and I’ll let you know the next steps.’
‘Thank you, Mrs Brown will be relieved to hear you are helping.’
Clara put down the phone and picked up the roller.
She knew Mrs Brown was hard work but how bad was it if Rachel refused to even take calls from the hospital?
She would head to the bakery tomorrow and find out exactly what was happening, but in the meantime, she needed to finish the painting in the hallway and then she was planning on cooking in the Aga for the first time. A roast chicken with all the trimmings and a lemon self-saucing pudding with cream. It was exactly what Granny used to make before everything happened, and she wanted to make Pansy feel like she had felt as a child when she was at her granny’s house. Warm, safe, cosy and loved.
She never wanted Pansy to feel fear like she had felt as a child and it was then she realised she loved the little girl. She wondered if she loved Pansy like she was her own daughter, would she fall in love with Henry?
Henry knocked on the doorframe.
‘You need a hand with anything before I go back to the van to shower? Pansy wants to stay here till dinner but if that’s too much, let me know and I can lock her in a cage, also known as the van.’
He smiled at her and she felt herself smile back. Oh, all bets were off, there was no doubt she would fall in love with Henry Garnett. It was hurtling at her like a freight train and she felt like she was tied to the tracks and there wasn’t a single thing she could do about it.
23
The sun streamed into Clara’s curtain-less windows and she stretched, wondering if Henry was awake. He seemed
