Bianca shook her head adamantly. For her, turning herself in to the police wasn’t an option. “Caesar, even if I do get an attorney and get off, I’ll still have to sit in jail while I await trial.” Bianca’s eyes filled with fear. “Do you know what they do to baby killers in jail? They have a special place underneath the jail for baby killers. God, they’re going to destroy me. When I come out, I’m going to be all fucked up. No, I can’t do it. I won’t.”
“But you are not a baby killer.”
“I know, but in this world, you are guilty until proven innocent, and do you know what the media alone will do to me?”
“You were a young girl victimized, and this animal took advantage of you too many times. He’s the one who committed the crimes, and he’s the one that should be under the jail.”
“Nobody is going to believe me.”
“I disagree. I believe you, and many others will too.”
“I don’t want to risk it.” She was adamant.
Caesar continued trying to reason with Bianca. “Okay. So, hypothetically speaking, let’s say we did run.”
She listened closely, because he was now starting to see things from her point of view.
“No matter where we went, we’d always be looking over our shoulders. That’s not the life I want to live. Why do you think I left Miami in the first place? I’m not ashamed to say it, Bianca, but I’m truly not ’bout that life. I tried it. I put many years of work in. It’s not me. I want to live with a clear conscience, not aiding and abetting a fugitive.”
His last comment right there let Bianca know not only where Caesar’s head was, but where his heart was, and he saw it written all over her face.
“I love you, Bianca.” He walked over to her, detecting the doubt she was having for him on her face. “I’d rather lose you for a couple years than forever. I’ll be here for you. I promise. I’ll do whatever you need me to do. Just don’t ask me to get caught up in murders and killings and shit like that. I love you so much, baby, but I wouldn’t do it for my brother, and I’m not doing it for you.”
His words hurt Bianca to the core. “But you told me there was nothing you wouldn’t do for me. You told me you couldn’t live without me,” Bianca reminded him.
“I know, and I meant it, but—”
“Then no take-backs,” Bianca said, sounding like a five-year-old. “You have to really mean what you say.”
“And I do.” Caesar held Bianca tightly. “But every person has their limits.”
Bianca pulled back and stared Caesar in his eyes. “But love doesn’t. Love doesn’t have any limits, Caesar. At least I know my love for you doesn’t.”
“I hear what you are saying, and I can understand how you might feel I’m limiting my love for you by putting boundaries on what I’m willing to do for you, but this is the right thing to do. You can’t keep running.”
“Like you? Like how you ran away from Miami?” Now Bianca was being condescending and nasty. She couldn’t believe her man wanted her to turn herself in. She thought he would have her back in this situation.
“It’s not the same thing. You can’t even compare the two,” he said, a little frustrated that he really couldn’t get deeper into his own situation.
“Well, from my vantage point, you don’t want to go back to Miami any more than I want to go to jail. So what’s the big deal? We can both live life on the run in our own certain way.” Bianca smiled, hoping her facial expression and words would give Caesar a change of heart. She watched him contemplate for a moment. She was once again becoming hopeful.
“I want to run away with you.”
Bianca’s eyes lit up.
“But that’s just not realistic.”
Her eyes dimmed once again.
“Okay, so you pulling my strings, playing with my heart and emotions,” she said, wondering whether he had been doing this all along, and she’d just been too blinded by her feelings for him to see it.
“We are not in some rap video or gangster movie, and I’m not going to pretend to be. I’ve always been real with you. That doesn’t stop now. You have to listen to reason, Bianca. Five years from now, you’ll look back and all of this will be done and over with. The consequences will have been faced, and you can live life free, or you will be totally exonerated from any charges. And I think being free is something you truly haven’t experienced since . . . you know.”
Bianca paused. She’d always thought it was her and Caesar against the world, but now she wasn’t so sure. “But I have been free. You made me feel free.” Bianca shook her head and walked over to the dresser. She looked at herself in the mirror. “You made me forget who I was. I wasn’t that chicken-head hood rat everyone else thought I was. You made me feel like a queen.” Bianca’s head fell.
“And you still are my queen.” Caesar walked up behind her. “A king takes care of his queen. If there’s one thing we’ve always had in our relationship, it’s been trust. I’ve always taken care of you, and I always will.” He kissed the back of her head. “You do still trust me to
