Suddenly her backyard felt like a prison instead of a sanctuary.
Chapter Twenty-One
Guy adjusted his tie, then stepped back to double check it in the mirror. It had been awhile since he dressed up in anything other than jeans or the sheriff’s uniform. Today was different. He was going to church.
“You weady, Papa?”
He spun around and smiled at Bekah. She looked adorable in her black and white dress. “I’m ready, Jelly Bean. Are you?”
She smiled and nodded her head. “Wachel is too.”
Ready or not? “Then let’s go.”
She clapped her hands in excitement, and he ushered her out of his room.
Okay, Lord, I’m going to try this again. I can’t promise not to fail, but I can promise I will give the church a fair chance.
The drive there was quiet and the girls went to the preschool classroom with no qualms. He headed for the sanctuary, praying he would see Evan or Darryl. He couldn’t believe how uncomfortable he felt. There was a time when he would race Charlene to the church doors. Now, he wanted to languish in the foyer and people watch.
Everyone wore smiles. Were they hiding their inner anguish? Could they really be happy with life? When Michelle stepped through the doorway, he breathed a sigh of relief. However, it was quickly replaced by confusion.
Michelle had seemed to harbor a deep resentment at Bible study. He thought for sure she wouldn’t darken the church doors. Before he knew what he was doing, his feet propelled him forward.
“Guy.” Her breathless exclamation reached his ears.
Apparently, he wasn’t the only one surprised. “Hey, Chelle Belle.”
The red on her cheeks deepened. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”
“It feels weird and I want to jump out of this monkey suit, but I promised God I would give it a try.”
She nodded. “I get that.”
“Do you?” He paused. “I never thought I’d see you in church.” Her gaze drew him in. She had the most beautiful eyes he had ever seen.
“It’s my way of giving it a try.”
He wanted to hug her so Guy slid his hands into his pockets instead. “How are you?”
“Conflicted. Confused. But I’m here. You?”
“Hopeful for the first time in a long time.”
“Sit with me?” The question was laced with hesitancy.
He was thankful for the offer. “I’d like that.”
They walked down the aisle together. Would this be a regular occurrence or was she just trying to bolster his spirits? He hated that he could no longer read every thought that showed on her face.
He used to be so good at it.
The worship service began and “Fill Me Up” carried through the speakers. Guy was surprised he knew the first song that played. Then again, it had been one of Charlene’s favorites. Funny to hear the song so many miles away from when he first heard it. He closed his eyes thankful the usual ache upon thinking her name didn’t follow. Maybe, healing was possible.
MICHELLE TURNED TO tell Guy something and stopped. A look of familiarity came upon his face as he raised his arms, gently swaying to the music. Her breath caught and goose bumps flitted up her arms.
He worshipped with such abandonment. She was always conscious of the people around her. Curious, she snuck a glance at those around them. Some people stared straight ahead, Others had their heads bowed, and a few more were in similar stance. Not a single person watched Guy, all seemed to be lost in their own thoughts. Only she seemed to be captivated by the man beside her.
How could they do it, knowing the horrors that went on in the world? And why couldn’t she let it go and embrace God like others could? Was there something wrong with her? Was she too cynical, jaded even?
As another song came on Guy’s posture remained the same. He lowered his head and opened his eyes. He turned his head and met her gaze, flashing a quick smile. The peace that shined back at her dazzled her.
Guy hadn’t looked that happy since he moved back. In fact, the look of joy on his face reminded her of the time he gave her the love knot ring. She turned and looked ahead. She didn’t know what to do with the emotions running through her head. A shiver ran up her arm as his hand graze hers. She turned, meeting his questioning look. Quietly, he offered his hand, palm up.
She stared at it, for how long she didn’t know. Finally, the desire to be close, the desire to not go through life alone tugged at her. She put her hand in his and wanted to cry at the beauty of the offer. Instead, she turned and listened to the music.
GUY DIDN’T KNOW WHAT made him offer his hand, but it was obvious from the way Michelle gripped it that she needed an anchor. The Bible study had shown him how blessed he truly was. Despite the estrangement between him and his mom, she still lived. Although his father had walked out on them, he still lived. His girls were his constant companions. He had people to do life with.
But Michelle didn’t.
Her parents had been only children, and their parents had died early in life. When she lost her parents, she had lost her only family. All she had left were friends. How did that warp her view of life? Of God?
He sighed. Lord, I’m not sure what to say to You. It’s been awhile since I thought anything positive where You are concerned. But today, I don’t come to You for me, but for Michelle. She’s hurting and her hurt goes deeper than I can fathom. Jo reminded me that You know our hurts. So I know you know Michelle’s. Please heal her and guide her. Thank you.
Worship segued into meet and greet. He shook hands with those around him, immediately noting the differences between their hands
