Wonderful, she thought.
After a few days, she had the strength to assume some of her old duties around the house. Primarily, she returned to her father’s study and reviewed the ledgers once more. He hadn’t done much at all within them since she had been gone. They were losing money now, of course, without any rents being paid. Many of the crofters had also abandoned the land to go south to the Lowlands or west across the sea. The land would have to be reallocated, she mused, if someone hadn’t already encroached upon it.
When she was feeling up to it, she would have to go see for herself. Although this time, she would be taking reinforcements.
Opening their lands to hunters was helping, though not much. It had not been very productive without the proper management. She sighed. She had some ideas for the land—for working with the clan members who could become guides and gillies for gaming visitors from the south. But she hadn’t the motivation at the moment to do anything further than run the idea through her head.
Rory had managed to stay for one entire day before returning to his “business interests” in Glasgow. She rolled her eyes at him. Apparently, it had been such a burden sitting around waiting for her to wake up. He seemed jumpy, on edge. A few times it seemed as if he had something to say to her, but each time she asked what was bothering him, he just shook his head.
Her father went back to half-running the lands. He didn’t actually do particularly much, just drank with his closest friends and told her what she could and couldn’t do when she brought ideas to him. Was this to be her life now, for the rest of her days? How to better the estate had been on her mind for some time now, but she didn’t want to do it this way. She didn’t want to do it alone.
Finlay never came. She hadn’t expected him to. He was a proud man, and she knew that he would have been slighted at her leaving. He may not love her, but he would have considered it a broken contract, even though she provided him with the three months, just as she had stipulated.
She could also understand that in his view, all had likely gone quite well. They had learned to resolve many of their differences, had reached an understanding, had even truly lived as husband and wife.
But that wasn’t enough for her. Not anymore.
She hadn’t thought of it when they had agreed on the three months, but it had basically taken them to just before Hogmany, the New Year’s celebrations. What a sad time to begin a life alone. She had looked forward to spending this time with the McDougalls. Somehow, she knew it would have a lot more life than the traditional celebrations with her family.
She had written Finlay a note when she arrived back at Darfield. It was short. She merely told him she was sorry she had to leave, but it was necessary, and thanked him for all he had done for her in their short time together. She said they would remain married in name, and she would visit soon to discuss their business interests.
But still part of her, a tiny piece of her heart, waited for his arrival.
If he loved her—if he truly loved her as she wished he did—would he not have raced after her, desperate to see her and want her back?
As she thought of him, she realized she longed to see him again. Perhaps a business meeting could be arranged? She had been thinking on their marriage—in truth, she could not think of much else—however, in terms of business, she felt they should take it one step further. If they truly combined the administration of the clans into one, they could be much more profitable. She would oversee everything from the MacTavish side, Finlay on the McDougall’s. They could provide her father and Rory with a stipend each month so they would agree to the plan, but effectively she thought she could manage it.
Yes, perhaps it was time to speak with Finlay about it. A small smile crossed her face as she thought of seeing him again, as painful as it might be.
* * *
Finlay sat behind his desk in the study, re-reading the note that he had kept on him at all times since receiving it.
Finlay,
I am sorry to have departed so suddenly, but it seemed the timing was right.
As much as I would have liked to have stayed with your family, it was necessary that I return to the MacTavishes and Darfield Keep.
Thank you for all you have done for me, in protecting me and establishing our business relationship. Our marriage will continue in name, and I look forward to meeting again to discuss our land holdings and business of mutual benefit.
Yours,
Kyla
He understood why she had left. He wasn’t always easy to get along with. He was stubborn, and hard to please. He had thought they had found something together, but clearly it was not enough to keep her with him. He had hoped three months would be enough time for her to develop feelings for him. He had tried, he truly did, to show her that he cared, that he could be happy and honest and what she was looking for.
He had failed.
“Still sulking?”
Peggy entered the room, her skirts swaying as her wide brown eyes took in his misery.
“What do you want, Peg?”
“I want you to saddle up your horse and go get your wife,” she said. “She loves you. You love her. But neither of you will let it be known! Whatever is wrong with you?”
“She doesn’t love me, Peggy,” he responded without emotion.
“She does. Tell her how you feel, and I guarantee you
