“Not anymore. Although when I told you I wanted to be in your bed, this wasn’t exactly what I had in mind.”
“This isn’t doing it for you?”
Erik pulled her as close to him as he could, pressing his lips to her forehead.
“Um, you know, strangely enough, as I’m sure you can tell, this is, in fact, doing it for me, which is sort of weird, since you look…you look…terrible, Kat.” He laughed, shaking his head back and forth. “You are so very magenta.”
Katrin beamed. “Sick girls. Maybe a new fetish for you?”
“You are twisted.” He shook his head, unable to still his body’s response to having her so close to him, lying next to her in a bed, even though he knew nothing was going to happen. “I’ll tell you something, though. That, uh, raspy voice? Pretty sexy, Ӓlskling.”
“My poor voice.” She wiggled away from him and gestured to the glass of water on the bedside table. “Can you—”
He handed her the glass of water and watched her drink it all down.
“Want more?”
She nodded, trying to clear her throat and wincing from the effort.
He padded to the bathroom and filled her glass then crawled back into her bed, fluffing up a pillow behind him to sit comfortably beside her. She finished drinking, handed him the glass and snuggled back under the covers on her side, resting her head on his chest. He brushed her hair gently back from her temples, humming something softly.
“You did that last night.”
“Mm-hm.”
“What were you humming?”
“Some old lullaby my Mamma used to sing to me and Jenny.”
“Swedish?”
“Norwegian.”
“You miss her.”
“I do.” He took a shaky breath. “She died so alone.”
“She had you and Jenny. Your Pappa. Your brothers. Didn’t she have a full life?”
“I don’t know. They started out in love. I know that. But, it was hard for him, I guess, watching her fail. Watching her die.” So he didn’t. He ran away. He left it all to me and my little sister.
He swallowed against the lump in his throat and briefly stopped stroking her hair to run the back of his hand over his eyes, taking a deep breath. “I think she died broken-hearted. He didn’t love her at the end, and she knew it.”
“Oh, no, Erik. I’m sure he did.”
I’m not. He touched her hair again, allowing the miracle of Katrin in his life to balance the terrible sorrow he felt for his mother. I promise not to be like him. I can do better. “Let’s not talk about it. It is what it is.”
“Is that why you’re so…”
“Why I don’t trust in love?” He shrugged. “I read all the books, but I never saw anything in real life that came close to the stories. Except my folks. I wanted what they had. Always did. But, then it turned out they weren’t…I mean, he didn’t…”
His voice broke and he looked down at her helplessly. She put her arm over his chest, holding him tightly.
“I promise you, it exists.”
He took a deep, shaky breath through his nose, exhaling slowly, warding off the lump in his throat, the encroaching panic. I can do this. I can do this.
“Katrin, about us…”
“Mmm?” she murmured, still beside him.
“Yeah, I…” The words didn’t come easily. He stroked her hair, wishing they didn’t have to talk, wishing they could just stay like this forever, but she deserved to hear him say the words. “I want—um, I think I want to, to be with you.”
He felt her cheeks lift with a smile against his chest, and he wished he didn’t feel so nervous, so exposed and vulnerable putting his feelings out there like that.
“You want me to be your girlfriend.” A statement, not a question.
He swallowed again, against a new lump in his throat. Old fears rising up against new strength. You want her in your life? You have to walk down this path. Man up, Erik. He pushed the fears back down and answered her.
“Yep.”
“Okay.”
He waited for a wave of nausea to overtake him, for his forehead to break out in a sweat or for his lungs to start burning as he gasped for air. It didn’t happen. His heart was beating so fast, he was sure she could hear it too. But, his fears about commitment, his paralyzing fear of being tied down…somehow it was all being held at bay.
He felt his lips twitch as an unexpected grin broke out across his face as he filled his lungs and felt his body relax.
She said, Okay. He had a girlfriend. Just like that, Katrin Svenson was his girlfriend.
Katrin leaned back, looking at him with her bright red cheeks flaming. “You okay?”
He nodded. “I’m okay.”
“Sure?”
“I think so.”
Her lips tilted up and her dimples dented her cheeks.
God, my girlfriend is adorable.
“Now that we got that settled, you think you could make me some breakfast?”
Erik nodded, tilting his head to the side, trying out the words for the first time. “My girlfriend is hungry.”
“Yes, she is, Minste,” she said, saucily. “But I think we should have breakfast first.”
“W-Whoa…okay!” He chuckled, eyes widening with surprise, as his body reacted to her insinuation. This boyfriend-girlfriend thing might be alright! “How many days until Friday?”
“Three if you don’t count today or Friday.” She pushed the covers away and slipped out of bed, moving slowly, like an old lady. He bet she was achy; he could see it. She put on her glasses, inspecting herself in the mirror over her bureau and cringed. “Ooosh. I look bad. Wow. That’s rough. Well,
