The warmth that always came to her when she thought of Ryan swept her off guard. She closed her eyes, letting herself pretend that Ryan was there, that they could hold each other and be together. The feeling of Ryan’s arms around her, their bodies melding.
As quick as she had remembered them, she shoved the memories away, brushing a few tears off her cheeks. It wasn’t the time to be sentimental. Besides, she had no right to wish for that resolution.
“And here is Chief O’Conner, to talk about the recent death in Amaranth,” someone was saying on the TV. Liv’s ears perked up and she put down the rag, heading towards the TV and turning it up.
“Hello.” The Chief, bulky in his uniform, nodded to the few press members there. “I’m here to talk about the recent death of Cairo Levitt.”
“And what can you share with us about this death?”
Liv recognized the presswoman speaking. She was from their local newspaper, a hard-hitting woman named Natalie. She had been that way even in high school.
“We are quite certain that it was a suicide, and we will not be investigating it further.” The Chief smiled widely.
Liv tuned the rest of the questions out, her head burning. There was a tall man next to the Chief, but Ryan wasn’t there. Did she just not care?
“Gram, I’m heading out for a bit.” Liv grabbed her purse, aware she wasn’t thinking and that she really shouldn’t have been doing what she was about to do.
“Take care, dear.” Gram waved from where she sat on the couch watching TV, Mocha spread out next to her.
Sunday 2nd October; 9:30am
Liv debated taking the dog, then shook her head and headed out the door. She knew where Ryan lived. She had never moved.
“I shouldn’t be doing this.” Those words became her mantra throughout the ten minute drive, her hands gripping the steering wheel so tightly her knuckles were white.
But she had to. Someone had to stand up for Cairo, had to prove that she hadn’t killed herself. If Ryan wasn’t going to do it, Liv would.
It was a kick to the chest when she caught sight of Ryan’s house for the first time in a long time. It hadn’t changed, really. Still the tall chimney, the dark, rusty brick. It was one of the more rustic houses in the city, and it looked like it had just stepped out of a history book.
Fury kicking her forward, Liv threw the car into park and got out, passing by Ryan’s car in the driveway and heading up to the door. Hesitation stopped her, but then she knocked on the door. Her heart was racing, and she could barely breathe, but she knew what she was doing was right. She had to make sure they took Cairo’s death seriously.
The door opened partway, then stopped.
It was okay, because Liv’s heart had skipped a beat too. It wasn’t just the fury that had her so worked up. It was the first time she had been to Ryan’s house in a long time. There were so many memories there. The first time they had made love together. Hanging out, lazily watching a movie and stealing kisses.
Liv swallowed thickly, her brain kicking into gear and reminding her why she was there. “I need to talk to you.”
“About what?” Ryan’s voice was strained, a distance and a coolness there that Liv didn’t like but knew she had earned. Liv was coming over with no warning, to a place she hadn’t been to in a long time.
“Cairo.” Liv spoke the word firmly, making sure that Ryan knew she would brook no argument.
Ryan studied her for a long minute, with Liv staring back, no matter what it did to her stomach.
“Come in.” Ryan pushed the door open a bit further, allowing Liv in the house.
Her steps were hesitant, but she stepped through the doorway into Ryan’s house. She took a few moments to stand there and breathe, the memories threatening to assault her.
Ryan was standing a few feet away, and her eyes were tender now as they looked at Liv.
Liv wanted so much to reach out and hug her. Kiss her. Smile, and be the person she had been with Ryan at least for a little bit. But those days were long gone.
“Follow me.” Ryan smiled faintly, almost like a ghost, and then led her to a room off the living room. “I’ve turned this into my office.”
“Oh you got the cherry wood!” Liv couldn’t help the exclamation. It was something they had talked about years ago, when they were in high school.
“You convinced me.” Ryan winked, the smile back on her face.
Liv’s cheeks burned, and she hoped Ryan didn’t notice. Liv had always wanted cherry wood furniture. Not that she had ever really been able to afford it, not with her family’s health problems. But seeing it in Ryan’s house made her stomach go all gooey in a way it didn’t need to be.
Liv looked at her, her eyes meeting Ryan’s. “I’ve missed you,” she said, the words so soft that they were barely audible. True, Liv had had a few flings here and there during her ten years away, but none of them had compared to Ryan and what had been between them.
She could see the surprise in Ryan’s face, in her eyes. Then the corner of her lips quirked up with a slight hint. She didn’t answer, but that was enough of an answer for Liv. It sent excitement through her stomach.
“You want answers, don’t you?” Ryan’s voice caught Liv off guard.
“Wha—?”
“Cairo’s case.” Ryan was turning to her computer and pulling up a program Liv didn’t recognize. “I can’t let you have access to the confidential bits, but I want to show you some of the witness reports.”
Liv stared
