So would my always knowing that in my choice to willingly save Sully, I ultimately gave up my life with my one true love, and forever stopped Davin and I’s beautiful future, killing us both inside. Three lives had been destroyed last night, leaving a devastating wound on my heart that nothing could ever heal.
Too much had happened last night for me to believe that I would ever be able to escape from my vicious delusions. They would slowly eat me alive.
What was out there that could possibly force me to be with Sully forever? I wasn’t a vampire, and human life was about free will, wasn’t it?
I couldn’t imagine my life without Davin. How could two people be kept apart that loved each other as strongly as we did, even in the vampire world? Vampires were known for their romantic characteristics and undying love –at least in the movies.
I couldn’t lie here any longer driving myself crazy with questions that didn’t come with any answers. My thoughts were swirling in a million different directions, and I needed it to stop; at least for now. My mind was fried from exhaustion.
Davin was nowhere to be found in his ice-cold room, that I had apparently stayed the night in, but I shouldn’t have expected anything different; we weren’t us anymore, so there was no reason for him to be here. They had probably only brought me into his bedroom so that I didn’t wake up in an unfamiliar place. I had no recollection of ever leaving the cemetery last night, where I must’ve passed out cold because I had no memory of anything at all after Sully was brought back to us.
I hoped that Sully was still okay. A sudden urge to go find him overpowered me as I climbed out of the massive bed. Physically, my body felt fairly normal besides a little bit of lingering fatigue; however, beneath the surface a horrible aching sadness infiltrated within me.
All of my toiletries that had collected in his bathroom from my overnight stays remained unmoved on the marble counter exactly where I had left them, waiting to be used one final time in his bathroom fit for royalty.
Once showered, I sat down at the built-in vanity, brushing through my damp hair with the antique silver brush that Davin had put in here for me the first night I ever stayed at the mansion many months ago. The delicate crystal bottle of rose perfume sat, scarcely used, in front of me. I spritzed my neck with the pink-tinted liquid, studying my reflection in the massive beveled mirror that was encased in rich mahogany above the marbled sink; but the person looking back at me was unfamiliar.
Whatever had awakened inside of me last night had changed me completely, altering my perception of who I was used to seeing in my reflection, making me nothing more than a stranger to myself.
Underneath my eyes were a little darker than normal; so that could have something to do with it, or maybe it wasn’t even my physical features at all, but the way I felt inside now that I knew my future was changing from this point on.
Being with Sully wasn’t like the end of the world because he had in fact proven to me that he was much more than the arrogant jerk he portrayed to the world on a daily basis. He had risked his life in order to protect me and had in fact died -not to mention he was definitely an extremely handsome man- but he just wasn’t Davin. We didn’t have the same connection that Davin and I had, the one that made me feel whole inside.
“What you did child was braver than what many of us shall ever have to experience in our lifetime.” The old gypsy was talking in my mind again. “You put your own selfish wants behind you, you knew exactly what that would take away from you, and you did it with a pure heart. You may feel hopeless inside right now, but in time you will be rewarded for your goodness. You will accept the changes you have no control over, without bitterness or regret. Happiness is not forever gone or far away.”
“I thought you were gone,” I spoke out loud to the empty air.
A transparent figure manifested directly behind me. I knew who it was by the unmistakable short chubby body, and silk handkerchief wrapped around her head that she tied in a bow underneath her chin, squishing all her extra skin together and causing her face look rounder and plumper.
Rosalinda Babic touched my shoulder, giving my skin an icy chill. If it weren’t for the cold that was exactly where her ghostly hand rested on me, I wouldn’t even know it was there. “I’ll never be gone child. You have a part of me inside you always. You will always need me. This fight may have been won, but the war isn’t over.”
My previous hatred for this woman had since subsided, replacing it with some sort of strange comfort. I knew that if Davin and Sully were ever gone, she would at least still be around. I didn’t want to think that a ghost would be all I was left with, but after last night I had to be prepared for anything to happen from here on out. Davin had been a little too late, and we had all almost lost our lives.
