voicemail part, but then Sawyer answered.

“H… hey… hi… I mean, hello.”

That took the wind out of his sails.

“Are you okay?” His brow furrowed as he listened to Sawyer’s heavy breathing, “You sound like you’ve been running.”

Or something else, the thought slipped in unbidden, but he shut it down just as quick.

“Huh? Oh… I’m fine. Work stuff. Did you need something?” Those words stung. Just two weeks ago he could call Sawyer anytime without a specific reason, now he felt like one of Sawyer’s business contacts who was bothering him after hours.

“No!” Even though his heart felt like someone was using it as their personal stress ball, he added, “I don’t need anything ever again.”

He hung up and put his phone on airplane mode. “He’s won’t call back anyway,” a voice whispered. “Bet he was waiting for you to end it.”

When did it get so hot in there? Fuck, he needed fresh air.

Ford jumped to his feet.

I need to get out of here.

He opened the door to the office and was about to leave when the work phone started ringing. He glanced at it for a moment, trying to decide if he had the energy to be polite.

This is still your job.

Ford squared his shoulders, then went to the phone and picked it up.

“Mr. Lancaster’s office. How may I help you?”

“Babe, I’m sorry. Things have been hard here. I’m sorry, Ford, I didn’t mean to hurt you. That’s the last thing I’d ever want to do. It’s just there’s—” Sawyer’s voice cut off for a second. “It’s just more complicated than I thought. But please, babe, I love you… I just need…” Sawyer’s voice was gruff. “Don’t give up on me yet, Ford, please.”

Ford swallowed, “Why won’t you talk to me?”

I’m not going to cry. I’m not going to cry.

Sawyer made it apparent that he had no desire to tell Ford what was going on or let him in, so he wasn’t going to embarrass himself by letting the man hear him crying.

“I just… Ford, baby, please…” He heard Sawyer’s pleading through his shaky words. “There’s just… I have… Please don’t give up on me yet. I just need a little more time to sort through things here. I love you, Ford.”

His voice seemed sincere, and he sounded like the man that Ford knew, but still, Sawyer wasn’t being honest with him. He was holding something back.

Or maybe he was ghosting you, and you’re not getting the hint… and he doesn’t want drama while the two of you still have to work together.

I love you too. The response was right there on the tip of his tongue, but Ford couldn’t say it out loud, not with so much uncertainty surrounding them. “It’s been a little more time, but you’re shutting me out. I’ve been left here not knowing when you’re going to come back. Have you even figured that out?”

There was a pause, “No. No, babe. I haven’t.”

“You were supposed to come back a week ago and spend some time here before you left again. That was what we talked about and agreed.”

“I know I was, but—”

“If you don’t want us to be together, just say it.” Ford cut in and then held his breath. His friend Ryan always said not to ask questions you don’t want the answers to. But in this case, he was wrong. Because even though he didn’t want to ask, he needed to know.

“Ford, I don’t know much right now, and everything…” Sawyer inhaled deeply and let it out. “Everything is crazy. But I need you to know the one thing that makes sense to me is you… us.”

He opened his mouth, but no sound came out.

“I swear I am doing everything I can to get back there, to you, as soon as I can. Ford, baby, I need you to know that I have never left a job so abruptly, and I know you’ve had to handle all the resort stuff, and it’s not fair to you. Not at all, I get that.” Sawyer let out a sigh that sounded tired. “But I know it’s in good hands because you’re there, Ford.”

It was all about the work. Everything he said was about how Ford could deal with the project on his end. Nothing was about their relationship.

Ford felt like he’d just been rammed in the chest. Sawyer just wanted him to stay sweet until the project was done. He’d been nothing more than an extended booty call with housing benefits.

How could he have been so stupid? So blind?

“Okay, right.” He cleared his throat because it suddenly felt like there was something lodged there. “I understand, uhm, Drake is trying to get my attention. I think they need me on the site.”

“I love you,” Sawyer said again.

“Me too.” He couldn’t bring himself to say it, to repeat those words.. He wished Sawyer hadn’t, especially if he didn’t mean it.

Maybe he needed to go up to New York. Sawyer couldn’t lie to his face, and it was better for him to end it now instead of pretending he had a boyfriend coming back to him.

He wanted to believe Sawyer, wanted to believe it was just that busy at work, but Sawyer had told him himself that he checked on projects every two weeks. So he was either avoiding Ford or there was someone else, and whichever one it was, it was time he found out for himself.

The next morning on the plane, Ford kept repeating, “I’m doing the right thing,” over and over, but it didn’t help the pit in his stomach.

And it wasn’t just because the small voice in his head kept telling him this was a spectacularly bad idea. No one ever found anything good sneaking up and ‘surprising’ their boyfriend.

The plane taxiing told him there was no turning back.

At least he knew he was leaving the site in good hands. Ford was confident that Drake was capable of working without being micromanaged, not like he planned on being gone long. Drake knew

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