“Are you sure?”
“Y—actually, no. But I want to.” I shrugged as best I could while horizontal and he moved over me.
Nerves tangled our limbs and made us laugh quietly, exchanging uncertain looks which silently asked are you definitely sure and replied no, but yes too. Never more so.
As soon as the tip of his cock touched me I half-groaned, tentatively held on to the knowledge we had to be quiet and discreet, then managed to turn it into a sigh.
“You okay?” He slid in easily, with little resistance even though this position was unusual for me.
“Yep.” I nodded. “Yeah, just gimme a…” I wriggled as he settled himself inside me.
“Gimme a minute to get used to it.”
Steven propped himself up on both arms and watched himself pull back an inch then slide back in.
And I watched him.
“Fuck.” He bit his lip and chanced a look at me. The shudder that ran up my spine wasn’t a result of being observed. Not anymore. “I’ve missed this.” He bent down to kiss me, or so I thought, but ended up whispering something against my lips. “I’ve missed you.”
* * * *
By the time it started getting light again I’d been awake for a while. Steven dozed beside me, one arm round my waist, and a leg hooked over both of mine as if unconsciously trying to stop me doing a bunk in the middle of the night. No chance of that. I was too exhausted. Physically so, at least. Something else kept me awake. The nagging urge to articulate that funny feeling behind my ribcage that wasn’t nerves or fear, but something that made me just as jumpy.
I stretched my legs as best I could while still tangled up with another man, and Steven’s weight shifted. He yawned, and murmured something that sounded like, “You’re still here then.”
“Uh-huh,” I said quietly. “You expected me not to be?”
“Was waiting for you to make your excuses and leave.”
I turned my head on the pillow to look at him, but his eyes were still closed and neither of us moved otherwise. “You honestly thought…?”
One bleary eye under a thick black brow opened. “Can’t blame a guy for wondering.”
His eye closed again and he nuzzled against his pillow.
“Why would I go? I like being here.” Fuck, fuck, fuck, that damn clot of whatever it is behind my ribs again. “I like…” Gulp. “You.”
“Hmm.” Steven didn’t open his eyes again and it must have been an occasion for unusual, out-of-the-ordinary feelings because for once I wanted him to. It wasn’t like last night when I’d accepted him looking at me. We’d both had a few beers, we got horny, I’d accepted it. Now I wanted him to look at me.
Give me something, Steven.
“You like me, eh?” Even with half his face buried in the pillow, the curve of his mouth was still visible. “That’s…that’s cute, Blackman. Real cute.”
“Hey, I’m baring my soul here, and you’re calling me cute?”
“Yeah, I guess for an emotionally-constipated hermit like you, that’s a big deal. Now shut up and go back to sleep if you’re staying.”
I tried to come up with something to say to that, but his laugh interrupted me. It wasn’t cruel, just teasing. But the conversation wasn’t over yet. In for a penny, in for a pound of humiliation, I reasoned. “I l—” Oh, fuck it. Nerves choked me, and I turned away from him, stared up at the ceiling.
“You l-what?” Steven whispered.
“Nothing.”
“Just randomly throwing L-words out there at stupid o’clock in the morning?”
“Yeah.”
“Like…llama?”
“Llama?” I echoed, laughing, and his eyes crinkled up at the corners before he muffled a snort of amusement against my shoulder. “What the fuck are you smoking, Kenton?”
“Shut up and go back to sleep, Blackman.” But even then, his shoulders shook with barely-suppressed laughter. It was a few minutes before he spoke again. “And I llama you too, you emotional cripple.”
* * * *
“Fuck, fuck, arse. Shit, sorry.” Steven slammed his mobile phone shut and collapsed back onto the bed. “Forgot to switch the alarm off last night. Sorry. Got distracted.”
I rubbed my eyes and yawned. “Time is it anyway?” I hauled myself up into a sitting position but refrained from swinging my legs over the side of the bed just yet. I’d have to get up at some point but didn’t want it to look like I wanted to get away from him. Especially given the half-asleep stupid fucking llama conversation we’d had a few hours before.
“Half seven.”
“Christ.” I fell back onto the mattress. “That’s far too early for a weekend morning.”
“Get some more sleep if you want. I know I will.”
“You’re determined to keep me unconscious in your bed, aren’t you?”
“Fuck, no. Just need you to keep your strength up for round two, that’s all.”
“Wouldn’t that require breakfast first?”
“Jesus, you expect me to feed you?”
“Either that or let me have a shower. Worked up quite a sweat last night.”
“Oh yeah.” Steven smiled at the memory.
I didn’t need to search through my mind’s eye. I had the bruises on my hips, the sore arse and a raspy throat from holding in the moans to prove I’d had a long night.
“Fucking hate the walk of shame, though,” I muttered. “Even with a shower I’ll still have to put on yesterday’s clothes.”
Steven cleared his throat. “Actually…”
“Actually what?” I frowned, but his eyes were still closed and gave nothing away.
“Ikinnagotemtostealyourshirts.”
“What?”
“I kind of…” He shrugged, only with one shoulder, the other being crushed under the weight of his body and a sizeable chunk of embarrassment, judging by the colour of his face.
“Might have got Gary to steal some of your shirts and pass them on. To me. Just for…you know…”
“You did what?”
“When we…” Still his eyes stayed shut, but his eyebrows lifted, giving him the bizarre look of someone both half-asleep and sheepish at the same time. “Arranged the invite. To the…thing.
