“Okay, are you ready now?” Warren asked impatiently.
“No, I'm not ready now,” I huffed. “What does this mean? Wonderland needs me? I'm the last of the Wilds? Follow a damn rabbit?”
“That last bit would be me,” Warren said. “But first, we need to make you small enough to follow me.”
“Will this start making sense soon?”
“Absolutely not,” he declared primly. “Sense is for earthers; wonderlanders know that the best sense is non. Ah, yes, here it is!” He took a crystal bottle down from a bookshelf and handed it to me. “Just one sip. Too much and you'll be the size of–”
“A pea,” I finished as I took the bottle.
“He did tell you! Excellent. Drink up.”
“This is absurd,” I said as I took the bottle. Then I noticed the label tied to it. Again, my uncle's handwriting. I read, “Drink me, Alice.” I grimaced at the bottle. “Well, that's to the point. Oh, why not?”
I uncorked the bottle and took a sip.
“Hurry; hand it over before you drop it,” Warren said as he snatched the bottle away from me and tucked it into his vest.
His voice seemed to echo around me as my world grew, or I shrunk, rather. I jolted in shock as I stared up at Warren's massive body. His legs were like redwoods.
“All right, in you go.” He waved his hand behind the same bookshelf that he had taken the bottle from. “Don't worry; I have the cake.” He patted his vest pocket.
I went to the edge of the bookshelf and peered around it. It was pulled out just enough for a small animal to crawl behind it, or a very small Alice. And there was a hole in the stone wall.
“Come on, Alice. I don't have all day,” Warren huffed.
Then Warren's body shimmered and shrank. I leapt back as he became a fluffy, white rabbit. All of his clothing disappeared except for his tapestry vest, which shrank along with him. Warren the White Rabbit hopped past me and into the hole.
“Follow the white rabbit,” I whispered to myself. “What the fuck is happening to me?”
“Hurry up, Alice!” The White Rabbit called.
So, I followed him into his hole. At the point, I really had no choice.
Chapter Two
A few feet into the hole, the ground dropped out from under me, and I started to fall. I screamed for awhile, and then I realized that I was floating more than I was falling. I opened my eyes warily and saw the root-veined earth slowly shift into raw stone, and then into polished marble. I ran my hand along the side of the tube I fell through and found myself slowly approaching it as my point of gravity altered. Everything turned around on me, and the walls of the tube became the bottom of a shaft until I was sliding down the slick stone and out into a circular room. My butt skidded across the marble floor, losing momentum, and then I came to a squeaking stop.
Warren was still in his rabbit form, waiting for me near a curved wall, tapping his foot impatiently.
“Hurry up, Alice!” He hopped over to one of five doors that were spaced around the room and kicked it open.
The door Warren chose was the only rabbit-sized door in the place. The other doors were of a size more appropriate for the average human. Since I was still a miniature version of myself, I didn't concern myself with the other doors, but I did note that they each bore a symbol from a deck of playing cards; the heart and diamond were both red, and the spade and club were black. I hadn't caught the symbol on the back of the tiny door, or if there had been one at all, and I didn't think about looking for it until after I was through.
Then I had other things to concern myself with.
At first, I thought we were in a forest; then I realized that the monstrous trunks, slick and green, were actually flower stalks. I had stopped to stare up through the cover of their enormous leaves, at the vibrant petals above me, and Warren hadn't noticed. He just kept hopping ahead, all Little Bunny Foo Foo–until the flowers attacked me.
With a trumpeting sound, a daffodil knocked me off my feet. Then a tiger lily growled and undulated its stalk down to . . . well, stalk me. I shrieked and rolled into a fighting stance, ready to punch out some petunias, when Warren doubled back and placed himself before me protectively.
“This is the Wild Heir, you foolish flowers!” Warren shouted as he thumped his back leg. “Do you not know your queen?”
The flowers froze, then lowered their heads to brush me with inquisitive petals. I straightened out of my crouch, looking at the monstrous blooms warily. By the time they were done inspecting me, I was covered in pollen, but they seemed satisfied. The blossoms bent double as if they were bowing.
“Now, if you don't mind,” Warren said primly, “we're expected at tea. I swear, the hurrier I go, the behinder I get!”
The flowers eased back, properly chastised, and Warren and I continued up the path.
“Do not tarry, Your Majesty,” Warren snapped. “Tulgey Wood is full of many dangers, and we've only just entered it. We still need to pass by the Bandersnatch burrow before we reach our rendezvous point.”
“Who are we meeting?” I asked.
“The others,” he said. “You'll know them when you meet them.”
“Obviously,” I huffed and trudged after him. “Can't
