Without any hesitation I walk right up to him, wrapping my arms around his waist. At first he doesn’t move, but then his arms wrap slowly around me. “You’re good for him, do you know that? I haven’t been the best father. I was drowning in my own grief and then set on revenge. I know he’s going to be a better father.” He kisses my forehead. “Go inside and lock up. I’ll find him.”
I nod and do as he says, heading inside, and locking the door behind me. I watch from the window as he shifts and jumps off of the porch, disappearing into the forest.
In the living room I curl up on the chaise lounge, grabbing the soft fleece blanket off the back, and throwing it over myself. I listen to the sounds of the night or early morning and fight the fatigue that is telling me it’s time to rest. Of course it’s a fight I lose in no time.
Merick
The trees rush by, the wind wiping around me as I run. No place in mind, just the need to be free. My mind is filled with so many things, anger being the most powerful one. How could I be the last to know about Abigail? How could everyone neglect to tell me that the one person that means more to be than anything is attached to the person that helped destroy my mother?
None of it was Taryn’s fault, I know this. But looking at her, hearing her voice, it all continues to remind me of the things I know could very well drive a wedge between us.
How will she take it?
How will I tell her?
That on top of my father’s persistence in taking the pack it is all too much. I feel like I am drowning, in an overwhelming rage. One I can’t tame, it only continues to smolder and advance with each breath I take.
I slow to a gradual pace, the sound of the rushing water can be heard in the distance. Running along the large stones that line the bed of the stream, giving it the waterfall effect. On a normal day that sound would be soothing, but I sure at this point very little could soothe me.
Pausing near the stream, I sit and listen. Trying to calm my racing mind only to continue to fall back to the same thing. The tie Taryn and I share, it’s no longer simply a beautiful connection felt by a young wolf finding his perfect mate in the woods. It’s tainted, clouded by the memories of the heartbreak, the loss and devastation I feel rushing back.
A young boy, the loss of his mother, the ancestor of Taryn helping to destroy her.
Allowing my head to hang I allow it all to take me over. I allow myself to feel all the things I thought I’d healed from. I remember her voice, the way she would talk to me and tell me stories at night until I’d fall asleep.
Visions of me young and my mother laughing as we run through the woods flood my mind and I do nothing to stop them. I embrace them. Suddenly those visions change and in their place I see Taryn running after a young girl. One that is laughing happily, the sounds of her giggles echoing around me. I feel the rawness in my chest, knowing that I had to get passed this newfound news. Taryn doesn’t deserve my distance, or my frustrations.
The sound of branches cracking in the close distance, pull me from my thoughts. I am no longer alone, but there is no reason to be alarmed. I can hear the deep breaths of my father, feel the connection one wolf feels to another. A communication shared between anyone within a pack.
“Son.” I don’t turn to face him. “Tell me something.”
Leave me the hell alone is what I truly want to tell him.
“Had you known about Abigail any sooner, would it have stopped you from falling for Taryn?” It’s then I shift to face him. “Would you have chosen any other to share your life with?”
“No,” absolutely not. Taryn is and has always been the only one. No devastating news could ever change that.
“You need to get past this.” Like I didn’t already fucking know that. “She is worried.” A sharp pain rips through my chest at his words. “Abigail was forced to be their informant, she was tortured and in the end they found our weaknesses. That is in no way her fault.”
I choose not to respond, I know all of this. Only it doesn’t take away the pain, the anguish.
“You need to take some time, calm yourself. Then you need to go home to Taryn. She needs you.” My father finally steps up to my side and his coat carefully brushes against my own. “And you need her.”
Closing my eyes, I again allow my head to droop as I take in a slow breath. Opening my eyes, I see the memory of my father and of myself.
The memories of the first time I shifted and my father was forced to chase after me. The first time we stood almost in this very same spot and he explained to me my fate. That day changed everything. Nothing was ever the same.
The sun has begun to rise, as I sit on the edge of the forest, staring ahead at my large house. One that, after all these years, finally felt like a home. I knew it was because of the woman now sharing it with and nothing to do with the actual structure itself.
I walk slowly toward the front porch, looking for the clothes I shed and finding nothing. Again, I feel the guilt of knowing
