Luckily the delivery guy didn’t seem too interested in my crotch. He just wanted to swipe my debit card, get my signature, and leave after handing me the bag of food.
I took it upstairs, and got Bree something to drink from the fridge before putting in the movie. Sitting there and trying to eat while still having a hard-on was one the hardest things I’d ever had to do…pun unintended. The only thing I wanted to do right now was get back to what we were doing before, and get myself some relief.
Bree and I sat on the couch, eating and watching The Lion King. It wasn’t quite a normal date, but I knew Bree was anything but normal. Maybe that’s why I’d fallen for her so fast. I just…I wanted to make her life better, see that elusive smile more often. I wanted to make her feel loved and protected. That wasn’t so wrong, was it?
Now, when it came to the other half of her love life…I didn’t know what to do there. Bree wasn’t my girlfriend, so it wasn’t like I could force her to choose. What I wouldn’t give to be able to peek into her head and see where she was at, what she was thinking. Did she like me better, or did Calum have that in the bag?
I shouldn’t think about it. I really shouldn’t. Sooner or later, though, I knew this would have to come to a head.
Bree ate a little, which was more than I was expecting her to. She never seemed to eat much, which was probably why she was so skinny. After I was done wolfing down my food, we laid on the couch together, and I held her in my arms, against my chest, as we watched the movie.
This was what life could be like. This was what it should be. Bree and I, together, no other complications in the world.
I took her home later that night, and when I got back to my place, I went straight into the shower and pretended, just for a while, that I still had Bree here with me.
Chapter Fourteen – Bree
It was weird, to feel someone else’s hands on you, grasping and greedy, trying to memorize every part of you. Even weirder to go home and lay in bed, picturing it, remembering how it felt and wishing it didn’t have to end.
It was nice. Nice and weird. Mason was…I couldn’t even describe him. Gentle and rough at the same time, like he wanted to do so much more with me but was holding back. It was good that he did, though, because I wasn’t sure what I would’ve done if he would’ve pushed me to do more.
I didn’t think I was ready for sex or anything below the belt, was I? I’d felt his hardness pressing against me, and if I was honest, I was kind of curious. What did it feel like? What would it be like if it was inside me? I knew what a dick looked like—I might be a twenty-year-old virgin, but I wasn’t completely naive. Still, I didn’t know. I just didn’t know.
I went to bed conflicted, and I woke up feeling just as conflicted, no shocker there.
It was as I was getting dressed that someone barged into my room, grinning like the Cheshire Cat himself. Or herself. I hurriedly pulled the sweater over my chest as I turned to face my sister. “You should’ve knocked,” I muttered. It was a damned good thing I already had my leggings on, otherwise she would’ve gotten a nice view of my ass.
“How was your alone time with Mason?” She got straight to the point; there was no beating around the bush where my sister was concerned.
“Fine” was all I said, mostly because I did not want to tell my sister every place Mason’s hands had found, everything he’d touched…everything he’d made me feel.
Wanting. He made me feel like I wanted everything and more.
Michelle folded her hands over her chest, cocking her hip with an attitude I knew was not faked. “Fine?” she echoed, lifting a single, freshly-plucked brow. “Just fine? Really? No details? That guy has the hots for you, majorly. He had to have tried something.”
“Michelle,” I whined out her name, “can’t you just take my word for it that it was fine?” The last thing I wanted to do was have a play-by-play with my little sister. She had a bunch more experience than me; I already felt inadequate when compared to her. I didn’t need any reminders of that.
She heaved a sigh. “Fine, fine. Keep your secrets.” Thankfully, she said nothing else as she spun on her heel and walked out of my room, finally leaving me be.
Leaving me be to…study, or whatever.
It wasn’t like I wanted to study, but I did have a test coming up in my psychology of aging class—not the psych class Mason and I shared, but another one. My class schedule was pretty full of those. Studying would get my mind off Mason and what happened last night, and the fact that I still hadn’t heard from Calum.
Who could’ve predicted this was where I’d be? Who could’ve known that I would be stuck between two guys who both made me feel things I never dreamed of feeling? It was unreal. Totally, completely unreal, and I didn’t know what to do with myself.
This was why it was easier to be alone, easier to stand on the sidelines and watch other people attempt relationships. I shouldn’t be one of them. Mason and Calum might claim they liked me now, but it was only a matter of time before something happened, before my shiny newness wore off and they saw me past the rose-colored glasses they wore when they looked at me.
I wasn’t special. I was nothing,
