Anyway, Olympia and Tessa weren’t the worst two people who could’ve been there in the common room, but they were a long way from friendly, so I headed straight for the men’s dorm. Halfway across the room though, I stopped. Felt almost like I was standing outside my body, even though I hadn’t summoned a shred of power. Finally, I turned and made for the nearest couch.
Whatever conversation the two women had been engaged in came to a screeching halt as I took a seat one couch over.
“Can we help you, Damian?”
By all accounts, Poltergeist had found a date almost as fast as Silt. Great tits notwithstanding, I pitied whoever she’d chosen. It was a sure thing that he’d end up regretting it before the night was done. It’d be a minor miracle if he escaped with his pubic hair and dignity intact. For once, I didn’t say that though. Instead, I just looked over at her and nodded.
“I was hoping to talk to Spectra, Tessa. Do you mind?”
Where Tessa’s tone had been a flawless blend of needle-sharp sarcasm and contempt, mine was… almost as polite as the words themselves.
Maybe weird mood didn’t cover it. Maybe I had finally gone insane.
Tessa seemed almost as taken aback by my tone as I was. She blinked her green eyes, stopped a moment before she was going to say something, and threw an exasperated look in Olympia’s direction. “Spectra?”
“It’s fine, Tess.” Olympia’s voice was firm. “I’ll talk to him. You’ve got your fitting anyway.”
“If you’re sure…” At the answering nod, Tessa rose to her feet, still looking puzzled, and headed outside.
“Fitting?”
“For her dress. I had mine this morning.”
“Oh. I didn’t realize you had a date—”
“What do you want, Crow?” Olympia interrupted. “You asked for a moment, and you’ve got it. But I want you to know,” she continued, her hands glowing with a light almost as silver as her eyes, “that I’m not scared of you. If you try anything, I will burn you down where you sit.”
“Ishmae already tried that,” I shot back. “I’m still here.”
“Not for much longer, from what I hear.”
That took the wind right out of my sails. “Yeah. That’s why I wanted to talk to you.”
“If you’re looking for someone to help you cheat, you can just…” Her voice trailed off. “Actually, I don’t see how that would even work.”
“It wouldn’t. I’m gone in less than a month, and we all know it.”
“Oh.” For the first time, she budged slightly from her defensive position on the couch. “What do you want then? Money?”
Honestly, it wasn’t until that very moment that I knew the answer, although some part of me must have known long before I sat down. Maybe that guilt I’d mentioned was stirring up trouble, the way guilt so often does. Or maybe I just wanted to accomplish one decent thing before I headed off to commit murder. Either way, I thought of Bard and the impossible mission he’d given me after Shane’s funeral.
“I wanted to apologize,” I finally told her.
I’m not sure which of us was more surprised.
•—•—•
“Apologize? For what?” Just like that, she got suspicious. “What did you do…?”
“Nothing.” Not yet anyway. “I just know what it’s like to lose family to a Crow. I’m sorry that happened to you, and I’m sorry me being here this year has made things worse.”
“Oh.” Olympia had gotten better control of her power as the year progressed, and no longer broadcast her emotions in light form for everyone to see, so when the glow around her hands dimmed, I took it as a good sign. “Did you know I was born with silver eyes?”
Fucking Lightbringers. Work up to an apology and they just change the subject on you.
“It’s not a Power thing, I mean,” she continued. “At least I don’t think so. My little sister had them too. You wouldn’t believe the amount of teasing we got growing up.”
“One of the kids at the orphanage had horrible gas.”
“What?!?”
“Fat Joey. Sometimes I wonder if he was such an asshole because he didn’t want people making fun of his farts.” When her confusion showed no signs of clearing, I shrugged. “We’re talking about embarrassing qualities, right?”
For just a moment, I thought Spectra was going to carry through on her threat to liquefy me. “What I was saying,” she continued, perfect nose now wrinkled in disgust, “is that we can’t always help what we are. It’s not your fault that you were born a Crow. It’s not your fault that a Crow murdered my family and most of a city. It’s maybe not even your fault that you’ve been an asshole this whole year, considering that we were assholes to you first.”
Mission accomplished, Bard, I thought to myself. If I survived killing Dad and somehow escaped afterward, maybe I could tour the country and show the people that Crows weren’t all bad.
“What is your fault,” Olympia continued, voice going hard, “is whatever you do after you leave the Academy.”
For one terrifying moment, I thought she knew somehow, but before I could say anything to incriminate myself, she was speaking again.
“Crows go crazy. That’s a fact. It sucks for you, but it’s still a fact. So what are you going to do to keep from hurting people when you do?”
“It won’t be a problem.”
“Oh really? How can you know for sure?”
The short answer was that I’d be dead or in the Hole, but I obviously couldn’t say that. So I went with the answer I’d have given three months earlier, back when I thought I still had a future.
“I have the word of someone I trust that they’ll take me out before I get that far.”
Olympia scowled. “Silt may talk a big game, but—”
“It’s not
