“Have you ever been topped before?”
She blinked a few times, processing his question. This wasn’t the direction she’d anticipated this conversation going. Slowly shaking her head, she said, “No. You were my first.”
“Did you like it?”
“Yes.” When she’d parsed out all the reasons why she’d been set on this path and all of the emotion that evolved, looking only at what she experienced sexually, she knew at the core it had been a freeing experience.
He seemed to mull that over. “Is it something you want to continue?”
With him? The thought slammed into her. This was a scenario she hadn’t allowed herself to even think about. Was he specifically asking about the two of them or was this more of a hypothetical question? She couldn’t be sure. She settled on the truth again without staking any claims. “I’ve thought a lot about it.”
He smiled. “Avoiding the question, pet?”
Her heart skittered at the endearment. “No, Sir. It’s one of the many things I’ve felt lost about.”
“I see. Well, you were…are…a lovely submissive. As much as I’ve tried putting you out of my mind, I just can’t. I find myself not wanting to try anymore. Where does that leave us?” he asked softly.
“I don’t know.” That response felt so inadequate.
“I guess what I need to know is if things were real for you. You know they were for me, Shelby. But I also know you were assigned to act a certain way. Was it all just a job for you? If I was, you can tell me. I think I’m ready to hear that answer.”
She shook her head. “No, it wasn’t just a job for me,” she murmured.
The breath he let out was long. “Okay then. When you’re ready, I’d like to start over.”
“What does that mean?” she asked slowly. Was he offering to redo her scenes, letting her explore the lifestyle without the cloak of her job? Or was he suggesting they try a real relationship? She would not assume anything.
“It means,” he said softly. “That I love you.”
She gasped as the tears she’d been fighting since he’d arrived rushed out. He pulled her into his arms and stroked her back, carefully avoiding her healing wound. “I don’t expect you to love me back. Not yet. Who knows, maybe too much as happened between us. All I’m saying is I want to try, see if we can make it work, starting with a new foundation.”
Shelby pulled away. “I-I—”
“Shhh.” He placed a finger over her lips. “Don’t say anything. Take some time to think about it.” He pulled away and fished in his pocket, retrieving a key. He placed it in her hand and closed her fingers around it. “I’m taking an extended vacation. I’ve decided I needed more relaxation and less time working in my life. I’ll be back in a few weeks, but if you decide you need to get some fresh air, you can join me at any time. No pressure.”
She was too shocked to say anything.
He chuckled. “I could always blackmail Viola into making you come to the island. I have a feeling she’d be willing to do anything I asked to square away the debt she believes she owes.” His smile ended on a sigh, humor leaving. “But I don’t want any more trickery around us. No matter how tempting the idea is to me.”
“I’ll think about it,” she finally said. He nodded and leaned in. Her heart leapt when his face got closer to hers. When he kissed her forehead instead of her lips, another ache formed at how tender the gesture had been.
Mason stood, pulled out his wallet, and gave her a card with the address and details how to get there. “Just in case.”
She watched him leave, the words she’d tried saying earlier whispering into the lonely air. “I love you, too.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Mason sipped his scotch as he took in the beauty of the turquoise ocean surrounding him, wondering why he hadn’t taken the plunge to buy a property like this before now. It wasn’t as if he didn’t have the money. No, time had always been his inhibitor. He’d joked to Parker that he’d wanted the feds to send him on a nice vacation after his duty taking down William Baxter was over. Not that he’d honestly expected an all-expense paid trip, or the time to go on one, but deep down he knew he needed the serenity of palm trees and saltwater.
The events over the last several weeks spurred him into fulfilling that need.
Because of Viola’s guilt over the money Mason had given Dave for information on Shelby, Jedrek had talked Jerome into getting the government to reimburse him. The excuse for the expense had officially been identified as necessary for the take down of William Baxter. Pretty vague, but they’d needed validation to get past the red tape for the reimbursement to be approved. Mason didn’t need the money. He’d invested wisely over the years and had stashed millions in several legal accounts. But Viola had felt obligated to pay him back even though she didn’t have that kind of money. It was her guilt that had propelled Jedrek into action. If the government paid Mason back, then he wasn’t out the money, and Viola wouldn’t have to feel bad about her soon-to-be ex using Mason the way he had.
Jedrek didn’t do it for Mason. He did it for Viola. He knew what Jedrek’s motivation had been. The man acted out of character when it came to that woman. Mason still didn’t see anything coming of it. Viola wasn’t into the lifestyle, and his business partner hadn’t overcome his demons. She was a distraction for him. One he’d tire of like everything else in his life.
But what did Mason know about women?
He did thank Jedrek for helping him out with Viola. If Jerome hadn’t sworn him to secrecy for now, Mason would’ve told Viola about it
