He shrugged. ‘I told you, Nina. Things change.’
*
‘I bet you Jack’s got a girl and she hates us,’ I said to Emma later. ‘And we don’t even know who she is.’
Emma gasped. ‘He said that to you? That he has a new girlfriend?’
‘Not exactly. But I tell you, if she’s changed him like this in the space of a few weeks, I already don’t like her.’
Emma coughed. ‘I’m sure there’s no one new, Nina. But if there were…?’
‘Well then she’d better clean her act up. I don’t want to lose him as a friend. Or you.’
‘You won’t lose me, Nina. At least I hope not.’
‘Sweetie,’ I said, ‘nothing you could do would push me away from you, save hurting my children.’
‘Or marrying Phil.’ She laughed.
I shuddered. ‘That would be your choice, but don’t expect me to hang around him.’
‘So… you would back me up, no matter whom I chose?’ she asked. ‘Even if it was the most unlikely candidate?’
‘Of course!’ I assured her. ‘If you love him, then I’ll love him.’
25
The Wedding Planner
The next morning found me sitting in my writing chair, waiting for the kids to surface before I started preparing breakfast. I’d been up since dawn, raring to get to work on our script. But Luke didn’t come down to work for another hour, and by then I’d already outlined the next few scenes.
‘Morning!’ he said, making me jump with a kiss on the side of my neck. ‘I thought we could all go for a drive today.’
‘Ooh, no can do; we’ve got much too much work to do. I’ve got an idea of where to shoot a scene and—’
‘Excellent. Let’s go take a look at it.’
‘But I already know the place, Luke. Trust me, it’s gorgeous. Have breakfast and then we’ll start, okay?’
‘Nina, you’ve got me working like a slave here.’
I stopped. ‘But I thought we were on a tight schedule?’
He poured himself a cup of coffee and shrugged. ‘The production company is mine. I dictate the timeframe. Maybe I’ll stay a little longer now. We can take our time. There’s no rush.’
No rush? I had to get my cheque so I could get Ben’s operation sorted. Of course I was in a bloody rush. But better to play it cool. At least for now.
A minute later Ben ambled in and sat down to his breakfast, absently mumbling a ‘Good morning’ when usually he was all kisses and hugs, happy to be up and alive. Luke, too, noticed this change and shot me a glance.
‘Are you okay, darling?’ I asked as I ruffled his hair.
‘Yep.’
I bit my lip. Ben was sensitive, but not fragile. This listlessness was new and unsettling.
‘Mum?’
‘Yes, love?’
‘If Dad came back and wanted joint custody, what would you do?’
Panic shot through my heart. If Phil was trying that on, it would only be to wind me up, because he already barely respected his visiting times as it were. I would have to deal with it immediately before he filled my children’s heads with all his codswallop. I pulled up a chair and sat opposite Ben.
‘Why do you ask, darling?’
Ben continued to shove his soldiers into his mouth and shrugged. ‘I was just wondering. If he said he was sorry for leaving, and wanted to get to know Chloe and me better, would you be upset?’
I swallowed, glancing at Luke whose wide eyes betrayed his poker face.
‘Is that… something your father’s suggested?’
He avoided my gaze. He’d never done that before.
‘Not really. I just wanted to know how you would feel.’
Was it possible that my kids were suffering whilst all I was trying to do was protect them? Even a judge had decreed that twice a month with Phil was more than enough. My throat had gone very dry, but I took his hand gently and held it in both mine. ‘Ben – what I feel is not as important as what you feel. Do you… want to see more of him?’
Please God, let him say no.
He looked up at me and I could tell he was troubled. ‘No, Mum, not particularly. I think we work just fine without him.’
Thank you God. He wasn’t the problem, then. ‘And what about Chloe?’ I asked. ‘Does she still want to spend more time with him?’
I didn’t know how the hell I was going to handle my whirlwind of a daughter if she made explicit, serious demands to see more of him. I couldn’t hide behind a judge forever.
‘Can I have some more toast, please, Mum?’ he asked, his eyes lowered again, as that was all he was prepared to say.
*
‘I knew it – I knew it,’ I fretted as I watched him playing in the garden with Olly and Joe who’d swung by.
Luke’s hands covered my shoulders. ‘Easy, sweets. You’re getting all worked up about nothing.’
‘Nothing? Phil wants to muscle in, and I can’t allow that. I can’t let our delicate balance be disturbed. I’m barely hanging in there and I can’t—’
‘You’re not barely hanging in there, Nina. I’m here with you. Every step of the way.’
I sank back against him, still not used to having a man under my roof. ‘Thanks, Luke.’
‘Anything for you, sweets,’ he said, wrapping his arms around my waist and nuzzling my neck, sending a shiver through me despite my worries.
‘Let’s go upstairs,’ he murmured naughtily into my ear.
I froze. He wanted to have sex with me? Now? I giggled off his offer like a consummate actress. Not that I didn’t want to. Because I did, of course. Who wouldn’t want to sleep with him? He was every woman’s dream. But I had to pace myself, at least a little. ‘Behave yourself. The kids are home. And we’ve only just woken up anyway.’
‘Oh, I don’t mean to sleep, hon,’ he whispered, lightly nipping my earlobe.
‘Hah, good one,’ I shot back. ‘The girls are still sleeping upstairs. Let’s – take our time.’
He sighed and let his head drop onto my collarbone, exaggeratedly but playfully resigned.
