“Mom is picking me up,” she says. I just smile at her, and she knows that it is a setup.
“She had something come up,” I say.
She looks at her friends. “I have to go. I’ll text you guys later.”
“See you later.” I hold up my hand.
“See you later, Ethan,” one of them says, and I swear she winks at me. When I turn to walk to the truck, I see Emily walk out of the school, talking with a student. She is dressed in pants and a white button-down shirt today, and her smile fills her face. My heart stops in my chest when I think of everything she told me last night. All I can picture in my head is her kneeling in the middle of the street and having to be carried.
“I can’t believe Mom tricked me like that,” Chelsea says from beside me, huffing out and making me turn and walk away from Emily. “This is low, even for her.”
“Well, we need to talk, and this seemed like a good time,” I say, getting in the truck while she huffs out.
“I have nothing to say to you,” she says, turning on the radio louder than it should be.
I turn down the volume when we pull out of the parking lot. “Good. Then I’ll do all the talking.”
“Whatever.” She turns and looks out the window. I don’t say anything as I turn down Main Street. I put the truck in park and get out, then wait for her on the sidewalk. When we walk over to the ice cream shop, she ignores me as if I’m not even here. She orders her cone, and I order mine, and when we walk to the table, she sits down and looks at me.
I take a big deep breath. “First thing I want to say is that I’m sorry.” She just looks at me. “I’m sorry that I left like that.”
“Yeah, whatever,” she says with all the attitude in the world.
“You have to forgive me,” I say, and she looks at me as if I have two heads.
“And why is that?” She takes a lick of her ice cream.
“Because I’m your big brother and because I told you so.” I smile when I say those words because I used to tell her that all the time.
“Well, my big brother fucked up,” she says softly. It takes everything in me not to go over to her, but I know I have to earn that trust again.
“I did,” I agree with her. “I fucked up big time, and I know I have to make it up to you.” She just listens to me. “Leaving wasn’t the best decision I ever made, but it’s a decision that I had to make for me even though that sounds selfish.”
“Oh, it’s selfish.” She agrees with that part.
“I need you to tell me why you are so mad at me,” I ask. It’s better to come straight out with it instead of beating around the bush. “I can’t make it better if I don’t know how you feel.” I smirk at her. “I get you hate me and want to kick me in the balls, but you need to tell me why.”
“You left us.” She starts off, her voice low. “Forget the pain you caused Mom, which was a dick move, by the way.” She glares at me. “But you just took off on us.” Her voice goes soft when she says the next words. “On me.”
I swallow the lump that has started to form. “I never meant to hurt you.”
“Yeah.” She wipes away a tear. “But you did. You were supposed to always be there for me. You were supposed to fight off the boys when they called me. You were supposed to scare away my dates when they came to pick me up. You were supposed to be there.” She looks down. “But you weren’t.”
Looking at her, I go one step at a time. “One, you’re dating?” I ask, shocked.
“Seriously, Ethan. From all that I just told you, that’s the only thing you picked up on?” she huffs out, and I see a little smile.
“I don’t think I’m ready for that.” Smiling, I get up and go over to her side of the table. I put my arm around her and bring her to me. “I’m sorry, squirt,” I say, and she turns her head and buries her face in my shoulder. She is trying so hard not to cry, but it’s getting the better of her. “I’m back now, and I’m going to make it up to you.” She cries out now. “No more dating. No more talking to boys. There will be none of that bull. In fact, I think I saw something about nun school.” She laughs between her tears.
“I am not going to nun school,” she tells me and wipes her tears. “How long are you staying?”
“For good,” I say, and she looks at me almost in surprise and shock, her mouth hanging open.
“Does Mom know?” she asks, and I shake my head. “Are you going to tell her?”
“Eventually,” I answer her.
“You hurt her really badly when you left,” she says. “And she is going to deny it if you ask. But …” She looks down. “It took her a month to get out of bed. I thought Dad was going to go bald from pulling at his hair. He was helpless. There was nothing he could do. Nothing none of us could do.” The words hurt, and she doesn’t say anything else. No more words need to be said. I know that I have bridges to mend, and I have to earn everyone’s trust back. When I get up from the table, I hold out my hand, and she takes it.
We walk back to the truck, both of us looking down at the road. “So are you really dating boys?” I glance over at her and smile.
“I mean, not a lot
