“Ethan’s been asking about him,” Kate told me. I gave her a grateful look. Mom had definitely been about to ask me questions that I had no interest in answering. There was nothing for me to tell her, or anyone, when it came to Sam. But mom wouldn’t settle for that.
Kate’s change of topic, kind of, was a great help. “The whole town’s talking about the NHL star who’s back in town,” she continued. “So obviously Ethan’s excited. Apparently, he’s going to be training at the local rink? Which I suppose makes sense. Do you think he’ll do something with the kids? They’d love it.”
Honestly, it wasn’t a question that I felt qualified to answer. When Sam had been my fiancé, we’d been so young that we were practically kids ourselves. Thinking about whether or not he would do an event for kids now made my stomach flip over itself.
Despite my career ambitions, I’d always wanted a family. Lunengrove was the perfect place to have both. In the years since Sam, there hadn’t been anyone in my life that I’d felt the urge to start a family with.
“I don’t know,” I answered frankly. “I doubt it’s the kind of thing that would jump into his head, when he already has a house to build and a wedding to attend. But if someone asked him…”
“Yeah, that’s a great idea,” Kate nodded, interrupting me. “He wouldn’t say no to you, he never could,” she informed me. That was... definitely not where that sentence had been going! Fuck!
But mom didn’t give me a chance to explain that I definitely couldn’t ask my ex - an ex I hadn’t seen in ten years - to go attend a kids’ hockey game or whatever it was they were proposing. “And the kids would love it.” She nodded. “Yes, that’s a great suggestion, Kate.”
No! Kate! It was a terrible suggestion!
“He’s a good guy,” I said, feeling a mix of desperation and defensiveness well up inside me. Mom had always had a way of making me want to jump to Sam’s defense. Apparently, ten years wasn’t enough to change that. “I’m sure if one of you asked him, he’d still say yes.”
Or at least, if he said no, then I wouldn’t have to be involved.
“But didn’t you just say you’re going to be seeing him anyway?” Mom asked. “You’re both in the wedding party. It makes much more sense for you to ask.”
In a way, I could see her point. The only reason for me not to be the one to ask was to spare my feelings. Mom had never been very concerned about that.
And Kate was certainly no help. In a way, I knew why. Kate certainly didn’t want to be the one to ask Sam a favor. The thing was, even though it had been ten years, I was still so sure that Sam would do it! He’d always liked kids and gotten on with them well. And he also enjoyed the way kids gushed over him for playing hockey.
But somehow, now I was tasked with asking Sam. Maybe if I reminded myself that it was for Ethan, it would be less weird. Nothing weird about asking your ex for a massive favor, right? Fuck.
Luckily, I had nearly a weeks’ grace. There were no wedding events yet, and Sam was presumably busy helping Pat build a house. I had my own work to do. At least I knew I would be safe there. If Sam needed a lawyer, he’d have one in Salt Lake. He was unlikely to walk into the office of his ex.
The same could not be said for Louis. We’d gone to high school together, battling one another to come top of the classes that we shared. Like me, Louis had gone off to university in a big city. Unlike me, he’d studied medicine.
When we both came back to town, we’d been thrown together a lot. It was three years since I broke up with Sam; I’d felt ready to date again. We were only together for six months before realizing we were too similar to make it work.
It had been awkward, at first. But these days, I was used to Louis walking into my office. He was looking to buy a house, but that wasn’t the only reason he turned up.
Sometimes, when we both had time, he just came in for a chat.
“Business or leisure today?” I asked, spotting him in the doorway of my office. “You don’t have an appointment.”
“A bit of both?” he said, managing to sound apologetic. “I brought you coffee to make it feel less like I’m just here to ask for a favor,” he joked. He did also present me with a takeaway cup of what I was sure was my favorite coffee. That had always been the thing about Louis, he was very nice. I could have done worse.
Certainly, my mom reminded me of that often. About how I could have married a doctor! But Louis and I wouldn’t have worked out, both of us knew that and neither of us were bothered by it. It struck me just how different all my feelings were when it came to this encounter.
It was impossible to imagine being this fine around Sam.
But Louis also wasn’t the right person to tell about the turmoil inside me. Instead, I reached to take the drink he’d brought, raising my eyebrow at him for an explanation of whatever it was he wanted from me.
Taking a seat, Louis gave me a sheepish look. “I’ve got some documents about the house, I was hoping you could look through them. Just check if everything’s legit, you know? It’s not urgent, so you don’t have to do it now! But... maybe within the week?”
“Of course.” It
