I swallowed past the lump in my throat.
“Carter, I’ll see you later?”
I didn’t miss the flicker of disappointment in his eyes before he nodded. “For sure.”
The door slammed shut, marking Carter’s exit and the fact that I was standing alone in the coffee shop with Ren.
My heart leaped and I threw my arms around his warm neck. He wrapped his around my waist. “It’s so good to see you,” he said.
“You, too.”
He released me and set his phone and keys on the table. His hair was messed up, his khaki shorts wrinkled, and his button-down shirt rumpled and rolled up at the sleeves. He was the complete opposite of the put-together business man I knew. But, he smelled the same, a cross between leather and spearmint.
Ren tapped his smartphone screen. “I drove all night to get here.”
“I had no idea you were coming.”
It was insane that he’d driven all the way up the mountain to get here. Maybe he remembered what we used to have? What we could be if we were together again?
“I didn’t either. But—” He let out a puff of air. “After you told me, I couldn’t sit still. I tried working all last week, but I kept making dumb mistakes, and I didn’t know what else to do.” He shook his head. “My brain’s gone. I still don’t know what to do.”
I studied the surface of the table, little tan specks shining through the black paint. “I’m almost twelve weeks,” I said, softly, checking to make sure no one was coming in. Thirty more minutes and I could flip the sign. “I’m due in February.”
“Does your family know? Your dad’s going to kill me.”
“I haven’t told them.”
He tapped his cell screen again.
“There’s no service up here,” I said.
“Right.” He crossed his arms. “Look. I’m really sorry. I want to fix this for you—for us—but I haven’t been able to find a solution yet. You said you want to keep it?”
“I am keeping it.”
“Sure you don’t want to consider your options?”
“I don’t need to. This is where I’m at.”
He slid a finger over his lips, leaned forward, like he was trying to see through to my soul.
“I don’t know if I can be there like you might want me to.”
“And I don’t care if you’re there, or not.” It came out super fast.
“But, you feel right making a decision like this without my input?”
I folded my arms over my stomach, turning to stare at the new campers across the street flocking to the lake in droves.
“If you don’t want to be a part of your baby’s life, I get it, Ren. You didn’t have to come all the way up here to tell me. But, it’s not fair of you to ask me to give up my child just because you don’t want it—”
“I never said I don’t want it.” The muscles in his temples flickered as he clamped and unclamped his jaw. “I’m just not sure if you have the resources to raise a child well, Lauren. There are thousands of couples standing in line to adopt—”
I leapt to my feet, stormed across the coffee shop, and slapped the closed sign on the door.
“We’re done. You need to go. Now.”
“I’m not trying to push you, Laur. I just want to talk it out.”
“Sorry, but unless you’re done mentioning the other choices, I-I’m done talking. I’m having this baby. Period.”
Ren spread his fingers out on the tabletop, his fingertips whitening with the pressure. His green eyes settled on mine, bloodshot, shining with—tears? Was he drowning in our reality too?
“If it’s what you really want,” he said, “I’ll deal with it. Just. Don’t leave me alone.”
“What?”
“I’ve never had this happen. I won’t be able to live with myself if I just walk away, but I’m not sure if I’m ready to be a dad.”
“I’m telling you, you don’t have to be. And, I’m not judging. Neither one of us expected this.”
He dug his hands in his hair. “When do you get off work?”
“Now, if you want. I don’t care if it’s early.”
“Want to grab dinner? We can talk more. Try and figure it out.”
My heart still quaked at the fact that he’d come. I’d never seen him this nervous before. And he’d never turned to me for comfort, but he was now.
“Okay.”
“Um. Can outsiders rent a room, or a cabin, or something?” he asked.
“You seriously want to stay?”
“I can’t work anyway.” He shrugged. “And it’s peaceful up here. Besides, I miss you.”
My veins were buzzing because seeing him reminded me how much I missed him too.
“The main office is across the street, past the snack shop. There’s guest housing up the road.” I dabbed at my runny mascara. “I’ll meet you in thirty. I should go change.”
“See you in a few.”
Fourteen
-CARTER-
“Put it up!” Tucker shouted as I sprang forward from the basketball key to block Cory’s shot.
The ball bounced off the rim, and I hustled to get the rebound, but Tucker grabbed it. I glanced at Hunter, the maintenance staffer Tucker had recruited to play on my team, and we darted back to our spots. Hunter shadowed Tucker, and I stuck close to the key because they were both garbage at shooting from the three-point line, especially Cory.
I blocked Tucker’s shot, turning to bring the rebound down as Hunter darted down court and chucked the ball to him. He caught it, making a fancy layup.
“Yeah!” Hunter landed, panting. His watch beeped. Glancing down at his wrist, he said, “Ah, sorry, guys. I gotta run.”
“No worries,” Tucker said, as Hunter passed him the ball. “See you.”
Hunter headed off, and I looked from Cory to Tucker. “What now?”
“Don’t tell me I didn’t try to warn you,” Tucker said, nodding toward the road.
Lauren walked hand in hand
