Tears welled up. God, she had to stop blubbering! Maybe aKeanu marathon …
Drew brought her back to the present, scoffing in typicalbig bro fashion. “Don’t go getting all soft and mushy on us now.”
Natalie blinked away tears while her mother looked on with apained smile that said, “I want you to be happy.” Warmth pooled in Natalie’sbelly and spread, filling gaps in her splintered heart like mosaic glue. Yeah,she was lucky.
T.J. was a man on the run, and nothing she could do wouldchange that; he couldn’t see himself the way she did. The way everybody did.His pain was too enormous, had too many tentacles, like a cancer that sneaksand hides and latches on to healthy tissue and feeds on it and grows in thedark, destroying everything good. Only he could vanquish it. And he had to wantto.
.~* * * ~.
T.J.’s teammates were yukking it up around him while they cleaned out theirlockers. The season was over, and he wouldn’t see some of these faces in thislocker room again. He took it all in with a twinge of melancholy.
Beside him, Nelson packed his duffel, whistling like hemarched with the seven dwarves. Guy was happy to be heading home to the BayArea.
Home.
Where was that for T.J.? Coach LeBrunassured him they weren’t trading him, so with luck and Paige’s help, it wouldbe a sweet house with a yard for Ford.
Images of house hunting with Natalie jabbed him. Purefantasy. God, he missed her. He’d reread her list so many times the damnpaper was tearing at the folds.
After autographing shit for the organization and each other,back-slapping, and exchanging bro hugs with teammates,T.J. headed to a different end-of-season gathering. The No Excuses! and their significant others were hosting a picnic in thepark. The event was a rare bright spot he’d been looking forward to sincebreaking up with Natalie two weeks and three days ago. Not that he wascounting. Not that he hadn’t died inside more each day.Not that he was hollow.
At the park, he popped open a cold brew and joined the guysas they talked excitedly about next season. Troy had been swamped with requestsfrom other disabled athletes wanting to join their program. The No Excuses! roster was expanding because they had the resources now, andT.J. was proud of the part he’d played in that new normal.
Glancing at Miller manning the grill, he caught Paigestaring at him, her tiny frame front-heavy with the melon growing in her belly.He ambled toward them.
“You’re here alone?” she asked.
Obviously. “Yep.”
She perched her hands on her hips and scrunched her eyebrowstogether.
T.J. darted a WTF? look atMiller. Miller gave him a shrug and kept working his spatula on the steaks.
Okaaaay. “What’d Ido?”
“You didn’t bring Natalie,” she barked.
Taken aback, he busted out a nervous laugh. “Why would I?” Morelike, why would she give me the time of day?
Miller gave him an eye-roll that said, “Wrong answer,dumbass.”
T.J. had never seen Paige mad, but she seemed to be windingup. Uh-oh.
“Because she’s beautiful, smart, and she has a huge heart. Imean, she overlooked all your shenanigans.”
“You do know I tried to talk to her, but she refused,right?”
“That’s all you’ve got? You let her go just like that, youbig dummy!” She snapped her fingers. “I thought you were made of grittierstuff.”
A little flame of hope flickered inside him. “Did she saysomething?”
“No.”
The little flame sputtered.
A beat later, Miller said, “Feel better, pixie?”
She hmphed. “Much.”
T.J. masked the sting. “Am I fired as a client?”
She threw up her hands and spun to leave. Miller’s gazetracked her impassively as he flipped a steak.
Another quick pivot, and she faced T.J. again. Her angerseemed to have drained away. “Clearly you’ve moved on, so you won’t care if Iset her up.” A statement, not a question. It firedsomething green and spiky in T.J.’s belly.
Paige glanced at Miller. “You remember Ethan Lind from theWildlife benefit, right?”
“Buff blond guy with the sweet Maserati GT? Sha! He’s single?”
Shit. Who’s this blond douchebag?
“Very single.” A self-satisfied smirk spread overPaige’s face. T.J. hadn’t seen her devious side before; he wasn’t thrilled tobe making its acquaintance now. The spiky green thing in his gut began shakingits cage. He needed to calm it the fuck down. Unfortunately, what came nextdidn’t help.
“He’s a catch; she’s a catch,” Paige prattled. “He likesnumbers; she likes numbers. This could work.” She walked off, beaming.
The wrestling match with Spiky Green wasn’t going T.J.’sway. He raked his fingers through his hair. “So who’s this guy, Millsy? A narcissistic jerk whotreats women like shit?”
Miller narrowed his gaze. “You do know you’re afucking idiot, right? Seriously, if you’re so worried about it, why don’t youget your head out of your ass and do something?”
T.J. gripped his beer a little tighter, his temper onsimmer. “Like what?” As it left his mouth, he was fully aware how stupid thequestion was.
“Oh, I don’t know,” Miller saidsarcastically. “Maybe start by apologizing for being such a tool?”
T.J.’s anger diffused. “I tried.”
“Try again.” A beat went by. “A few words of advice?”
“Do I have a choice?” T.J. snorted.
“If you want Natalie, then listen up. Relationship 101:Grovel. In your case, I recommend extreme groveling. Think of it as anendurance sport with some sweet bennies at the end.”
“Speaking from experience?”
“No way. I know how to take care of my woman.”
“Who’s taking care of a woman, and can I watch?” cameWheelie Mark’s voice.
Shit. Just what I need.
Miller pointed the spatula at T.J. “This asshathas a thing for a certain hottie, but he’s too stupidto do anything about it.”
Mark looked T.J. up and down. “If we’re talking aboutNatalie, then you are stupid. If I was single, I’d—”
“But you’re not single,” T.J. snarled. A sip of hisbeer to coat his parched throat, and he pushed a cleansing breath through hislungs. “Anyway, she’s smart to steer clear of my wreckage.”
“Got that right,” Miller huffed. “‘Course, she seems to likewreckage. She stuck by May. Now that’s what I call loyalty.”
Mark chimed in. “Who of us isn’t a wreck? Look at me,man. You can be a wreck
