“Or you could stay,” he says, pulling away until I’m looking up into his handsome face.
“I don’t understand? We already had sex,” I say, bewildered. Does he want to do it again? I mean I’m okay with that, but is that what he means.
“I love fucking you Priss, but that isn’t the only reason I want you to stay with me,” he says, his fingers gripping my chin, holding my face up when all I want to do is look away.
“Then why?”
A sadness fills his eyes and I instantly prickle, I don’t want his pity.
“Have you ever had a boyfriend?”
I shake my head.
“Ever had a guy friend?”
I shake my head again.
“Ever had a friend.”
Scowling, I rip my chin from his grip and try to turn away, but he grabs me, hauling me roughly back to him. He forces me to walk backwards, crowding me until my spine hits the wall and he cages me in, his body pressed firm against mine, imprisoning me.
“Don’t fucking turn away from me when I’m talking to you. When we’re having a conversation I want to see your eyes. You get me?” he snarls, eyes angry and daring me to look away.
I nod. “Okay,” I whisper. What he’s doing, how he’s acting, I should be frightened, but he’s not hurting me. If I really wanted to leave I think he’d let me despite our size difference, because even though he’s huge and has me pinned to a wall, I feel utterly protected by him.
“Good. Now listen to me carefully, because I’m going to spell it out for you. I like you. I want to figure you out. Yes, I want to fuck you. Yes, I want to kiss and touch you and watch you do what I ask you to, but that’s not all I want.”
I feel my lips part in shock, but no sound comes out as I watch him swallow, his head tilting to the side a little as he stares at me.
“I don’t understand it Priss, but I want to take care of you. I want to protect you and look after you. I think I want to fucking keep you, which is confusing the fucking hell out of me, but the truth is that I don’t think you’re evil. I don’t think you’re a bad person.”
I open my mouth to speak but he glares, shaking his head to silence me.
“I’m not an idiot. I know you’ve done bad shit. I know you’ve used and manipulated and lied. I know you’ve done stuff that has tarnished you. But the things you’ve done don’t have to define you, not if you learn from them.”
His words are honest and brutal, but his touch is so soft I barely realized that he’s stroking my cheek until he’s stopped speaking and is just watching me.
“I’ll take you back to the hotel, but I want you to think about what I’ve said. You don’t have to be alone Priss. Your sister wants a relationship with you, she wants to be in your life. I want to be in your life. Hell, after one night I can guarantee that Fitzy wants to be in your life, and all you have to do is let us. I won’t tell you what to do about this Priss, even though I can see from the way you’re looking at me that you want me to. This has to be your decision.”
“I’m not a good person to be around, I don’t trust who I am,” I admit, closing my eyes so I don’t have to see his face.
“So choose to be different. Choose to be a sister, choose to be a friend, choose to be mine. But whatever you do, you have to be the one to choose it. You. Not your mom and dad, not some dead guy, not me. You.”
21
Carson
I have no idea what’s happening tonight. Honestly, I have no idea what’s been happening since I woke up to find her in my bedroom asking me to help her break that godforsaken will.
Everything that’s happened since that day has been like a river full of rapids, never stopping, just bouncing me from one eddy to the next while I frantically try to keep my head above water.
Carrigan Archibald is the enemy.
Was the enemy.
Now, I have no fucking clue what she is.
No that’s a lie, I know what I want her to be. I want her to be mine, my Priss, mine. But what the hell would I do with her if she was? Can I even tell my friends, my family that I fell for the devil? Only she’s not the devil, she’s just a lonely, mixed up sad girl. When I met Tally, I thought she was the saddest person I’d ever met, but behind the fragile exterior is a backbone of steel. Her twin is the opposite, her exterior is hard, but her inside is soft and delicate. Two sides of the same coin and somehow, I’ve lost myself to them both. Tally as a sister, Priss as my girl.
My girl.
I want Carrigan Archibald to be my girl. Only instead of carrying her to my bed, I’m walking her to her hotel room and I’m going to have to leave her here, even though I hate it, even though I want her to sleep naked and curled against me.
I can’t make her choose to live, to change, to take responsibility for her past and then move forward from it. If I could take that burden for her I would, but I can’t, so instead I’m going to walk away and hope she finds her way back to me, even though it’s going to kill me to do it.
She hasn’t said a word since I pinned her to the fucking wall of my boat like a god damn caveman. She just silently gathered her cell and the robe she was wearing when
