The seconds stretch into eternity.
All I hear is my breath, scratchy and rough, and my heart like a beating drum.
Then the sounds of the city outside return.
The world returns.
Her arms are shaking slightly as she runs her hands up my chest, over my shoulder, staring up at me with such startling clarity. “Have I ever told you how good you are?”
I give her a lopsided grin, pulling out and lying down beside her, putting my leg over her hip protectively. “I inferred as much.”
“I mean it. And I mean in…you’re so good Luciano. Too good for me.”
“I’m not too good for anyone,” I tell her. “But we’re more than good enough for each other.”
I love you.
I’ve fallen in love with you.
But despite all we’ve talked about, I have to guard my words from her. I want to be open, but not open enough to scare her away. She’s still that wild animal that will run if she gets cornered.
I’ll have to let her do things on her own terms.
I have to hope she’ll fall in love with me.
But the one thing I think she knows too, is that what we are has changed. What was once a possibility is now the reality.
There is an us now.
There’s no turning back.
Sixteen
Ruby
It’s strange to be back here.
Even though I’ve only been here at the Alcochete Training Centre once, when I first laid my eyes on Luciano for that now infamous interview, it feels like it was just yesterday. And yet everything has changed. Now I’m here with Elena, sitting in the stands and watching Luciano and his team at practice, huddled under a big scarf together in the crisp December air.
“This is exciting,” Elena says to me. “I mean, it beats the hell out of watching my nephew practice.” I glare at her jokingly. “No offense, you’re a good coach,” she adds.
I wave her off, my eyes going back to the pitch where Luciano is yelling enthusiastically at the goalkeeper as the team lines up and starts hammering in the ball. The goalkeeper is getting quite the workout, leaping from side to side, but to my surprise he actually blocks most of the shots. No wonder the team has been doing better this year.
And so much of that can be attributed to Luciano. I’ve watched him over the years, but never in person, and I’ve never seen him at practice. Now I can see just how vital he is to the team, how easily he stepped into this role.
To think that his stepfather tells him he’s pathetic and a fluke. I swear to god, if I ever see that man again, I might give him a big old bitch-slap to the face.
“So, how does it feel to know that man is your boyfriend?” Elena asks idly, elbowing me in the side.
“He’s not my boyfriend,” I mutter, giving her a dirty look.
“Sure, sure. Fuck buddy then. But you’re much more than friends.”
“Right now we’re just friends, okay? Must I remind you that I used to date his brother?”
“So?”
“So? We’re just lucky that Marco never comes to watch Luciano practice. Apparently he doesn’t go to the games much either.”
“Don’t tell me that Marco is still pining for you. I don’t even get one guy pining over me, and you get two brothers.”
I snort. “Marco isn’t pining. He broke up with me, remember? I haven’t talked to him or seen him since, you know that.”
“Doesn’t mean he’s not pining for you. I mean, your relationship didn’t sound all that bad.”
“It wasn’t. It was just temporary. But I mean…what I feel for Luciano compared to what I felt for Marco, it can’t even be compared. Marco was the safe bet…”
Marco couldn’t hurt me.
She points at Luciano, who is now effortlessly kicking the ball and getting it past the goalie with aplomb, soaring into the back of the net. He’s grinning now, running around with his arms up.
“And that guy isn’t a safe bet?” she says.
“Look, I knew what I had with Marco had an expiration date. So he was the safe bet. I didn’t get attached to him. I didn’t fall in love. I couldn’t have even if I tried. But Luciano…I don’t know. I don’t think I could have protected myself from him if I had ended up with him instead.”
“Yeah, but that guy’s in love with you.”
My heart stills in my chest. My mouth opens and closes, refusing to believe her words. “No he isn’t.”
“I know when these Portuguese men fall in love, okay? He’s in love with you. It’s beyond obvious.”
I roll my eyes, refusing to believe she’s some expert in Portuguese love. “You don’t even know him. You met him briefly at the club, and only in passing before practice.”
“I know what I know,” she says, sitting back and folding her arms. “That man is the safe bet.”
“No.” That’s the man who has the power to shatter me.
If I let him.
“And anyway,” I go on, “we are just friends. No one is in love with anyone. We’re just having fun while I’m here.”
“I don’t believe it. You protest too much.”
“Believe it.”
“Well, I would love it if Marco showed up during the game on Tuesday night, and then Luciano and he would have to have a fist fight over you,” she says, her eyes dancing. “Brother versus brother! Agent versus client!”
I slap her arm with the back of my hand. “Don’t say that. You have no idea how bad that would be. And that’s why we’re just friends, okay? Neither of us can get into any trouble.”
“Have you even contacted Marco to tell him you’re here?”
“No, and I’m not going to. That’s up to Luciano.”
Luciano and I actually talked about it the other day, when we were at his
