And Simon hadn’t even kissed her yet. But perhaps he would tonight. By nine o’clock everyone was trickling out, and Ellie and Alice offered to start the washing-up while Olivia took Tina, who was looking quite tired, back to Witney.
“Will you stay?” she asked Simon as she headed out with her mum. “We could have a sherry upstairs after…”
Simon’s mouth turned down at the corners and he shook his head. “I’m sorry… That sounds delightful but I really should get back.”
“Oh. Okay.” Olivia tried not to show her startled hurt. She’d been expecting Simon to say yes. She’d thought they were both hurtling towards something, and while saying no hardly meant a screeching halt, it sort of felt like one.
She had to get over this ridiculous insecurity, she told herself as she helped Tina into her car. The night was black and breath-takingly cold, and the stars looked very far away. So Simon needed to get back home. No big deal. She didn’t need to feel so rejected, as if everything was suddenly cast in doubt.
“Simon seems like a nice man,” Tina remarked as Olivia started the car and headed out of the village.
“He is, Mum.”
“I’m glad you’ve found someone, darling, I really am.”
“Well, it’s early days yet.”
“I know, but I feel better knowing you’re not alone.”
“Mum…”
“Sorry.” Tina held up a hand. “I’m not trying to sound melodramatic.” She leaned her head against the seat. “I had a lovely time tonight.”
“I’m glad, Mum.” Olivia hesitated. “Will you come to the flat for Christmas, then? Simon will be there too and it would be lovely to spend the day together. I don’t like thinking of you having some institutionalised dinner by yourself…”
“It’s not that bad,” Tina said reprovingly. “And the people are quite nice. I went to a coffee and cake morning a few days ago.”
“You did?” Olivia was both pleased and surprised. It was the first event her mother had gone to at the retirement community.
“Yes, I did. I figured I needed to start meeting people, before I lose all my marbles.”
“Oh, Mum—”
“I’m joking, Olivia.” Tina smiled at her. “Sort of.”
“I’d still like you to have Christmas with us,” Olivia persisted. She didn’t want to nag, but she worried her mum was insisting on staying in Witney out of some misplaced sense of not wanting to be a bother. “If you want to.”
Tina turned to look out the window. The wolds were cloaked in darkness. “Wouldn’t you rather spend it with your new man?”
“No, I’d rather spend it with you. Seriously, Mum.” Olivia didn’t want to sound macabre by saying something about who knew how many Christmases together they had left, but she felt it. She wanted to enjoy life as it came, just as Simon had said back in the pub. Take each moment and hold it in her hand. Savour what—and when—she could.
“All right,” Tina relented. “If you insist. I just don’t want to be a bother.”
“You won’t be,” Olivia promised. “At all.”
Back at Tea on the Lea, after dropping her mother off, Olivia found the shop and kitchen both sparkling clean, with Ellie draping a damp tea towel over the oven railing, and Alice putting the last few cakes in Tupperware.
“You’re too wonderful,” Olivia said, hugging them both. “I was expecting to have to be up for hours.”
“Glad to be of service,” Ellie said cheerfully. “It was a fab evening, Olivia. You deserve to put your feet up.”
Which was what she’d wanted to do—with Simon. Olivia tried not to let that bother her as she headed upstairs to her flat, kicking off her low heels with a groan of relief. Dr Jekyll was in Mr Hyde mode, hissing at her from the corner of the kitchen, but Olivia just ignored him.
“You’re warm and fed and cosy,” she said as she collapsed onto the sofa. “You have nothing to complain about.”
And neither did she. So Simon had declined her invitation. It wasn’t a big deal. At least, it didn’t have to be a big deal, if she chose not to make it one. She hugged her knees to her chest, willing herself to feel that, or at least to believe it.
A text pinged on her phone, and she snatched it, her heart lifting when she saw it was from Simon.
Sorry I didn’t come round. I don’t think I’d be very good company.
But he’d been charming company all evening. Frowning, Olivia deliberated over her response. It’s okay, Simon, she finally texted. Another time.
She sent it, waiting for his reply, but none came. Tossing the phone aside, Olivia gazed into the empty fireplace, the ashes of their fire from the other day filling the grate, and she tried to decide if his text had made her feel better—or worse.
Chapter Twelve
After the success of the Christmas Carols & Quiz Evening, Olivia decided to give herself a break and close the shop for the week of Christmas. She wanted time to relax, to spend with Simon, and to focus on her mum—and she didn’t usually get much custom during Christmas anyway, as everyone was busy at home with their families.
First, of course, she had to finish her cupcake promotion, which she did on the twentieth of December, with a big, red and green sign in the window advertising the free cupcake for “loyal customers.” She made a batch of triple chocolate cupcakes and another of her own creation, Christmas cake cupcakes, complete with brandy-soaked fruit and marzipan icing, which she gave away for free.
Over twenty people, all told, came in to buy their last cupcake and get their card stamped, and Olivia decided the promotion had been more than worthwhile—she gave Mallory another six Nutella cupcakes, her favourite flavour, as a thank you for giving her the idea.
Simon came in as
