I scoff at his nitpicking. “Semantics. You still called the best kiss of my life a mistake.”
“I knew you mistook my words, but not like this. If I had, I would have stopped you from leaving that day, but I thought you needed some time, especially after the way I treated you.”
He shakes his head slightly, like he’s trying to clear his head, while I stand here silently, waiting for him to continue. I’m not sure if I want him to finish so I can leave, or if I desperately want to believe he has an explanation to what happened that doesn’t break my heart again.
“I knew I hurt you, said some shit that wasn’t true, sometimes with the sole intention of provoking your anger. I was trying to find a way to apologize for everything that day in the barn, clean the slate so to speak. I wanted to start over, instead I said something that infuriated you—something I tend to do around you. You have no idea how gorgeous you look when you’re all fired up telling someone off, even if that someone is me. I couldn’t help myself, I needed to kiss you.” A blinding smile forms on his lips, like the memory of the kiss makes him unbelievably happy. “It was the best kiss of my life too. Nothing compares to your lips on mine, your body pressed deep against mine, feeling you lose control for me. Absolutely nothing.” He emphasizes the last to words by leaning infinitely closer until all I can see are his blue eyes with barely any gray left in them.
All the breath in my lungs has left me. I’m panting like I’ve just finished a marathon. “Kade…”
“I didn’t mean to say you were a mistake or the kiss we shared. Though, I wish it hadn’t happened while you still hated me, while the hurt I inflicted still wreaked havoc inside of you. Hurt I could see swirling behind your eyes that day, hurt I clearly piled on with my careless words.”
“So you didn’t mean to say I was a mistake?” My voice sounds meek even to my own ears.
“Fuck no, that kiss was everything I didn’t know I was looking for,” he reassures me. “Please believe me, you could never be anyone’s mistake. Especially mine. Fuck, any man would be lucky to have someone as extraordinary as you look at them twice.”
I stare into his eyes blazing with what I’ve come to recognize as lust and longing. “I—I don’t know what to say. I guess I have a habit of expecting the worst.”
“I noticed that. And one day you’ll tell me why that is. But not today.”
“We’ll see,” I say with a genuinely happy smile tugging at my lips.
“We will.” His answer is a lot more confident than mine. “How about you go back into the living room, and I’ll see if I can find something for us to eat that doesn’t require the use of any of the appliances.”
His sudden change in topic throws me for a second. I have to say, I expected a kiss after the heavy conversation we just had, not an offer to make dinner. Instead of saying anything else, he gives me a quick peck on the lips, something that only leaves me wanting more, before he moves away from me. I can’t contain the groan leaving my throat at the distance.
When I turn to walk around him into the living room, he stops me and whispers into my ear. “Don’t worry, I’m not done with you yet. But you need to keep up your strength for what’s to come.”
His words send a shiver down my spine and spike arousal. I can’t believe words alone from this man can make me wet and leave me wanting more.
I have to bite my lip to keep from moaning when he pulls away and takes his warmth with him, leaving me slightly chilly in the surprisingly still warm house. I guess the fireplace is big enough to warm most of the ground floor, though I’m afraid to see what upstairs feels like.
I yelp in surprise when I suddenly feel a hand connect with my ass before Kade’s deep voice orders me to, “Go sit in on the couch and drink your wine, Princess.”
It takes me all of two seconds to follow his orders and avoid helping in the kitchen. Maybe some wine will help me to get my jumbled thoughts in order.
Chapter Fourteen
I’m sitting on the couch, wrapped in the warm blanket, and staring into the fire. The room is warm and cozy. It looks like a scene out of every romantic comedy Hallmark has ever produced.
My mind is still racing with what happened in the kitchen.
Is he telling the truth? Or is he trying to deceive me for some reason?
The cynical side of me is quick to point out that of course he’d lie to get me to sleep with him, that side is also kind of vain, clearly. Though, most of me doesn’t think that’s the case. If it was, he could have fucked me in the barn. I’m not going to lie, even to myself, I wouldn’t have put up a fight that day.
Yet, he was the one to stop it before it passed the point of no return. Because he thought I deserved more. It’s not like I can fault him for that, I should ask for more than being taken in a dirty barn by a man who I thought hated me, any woman deserves more than that.
It’s like I’m torn between my heart and head, both of them giving me
