“I tried to seduce Brian last night.”
Téa almost choked, “Say that again?”
“I tried to seduce Brian last night.”
“I heard you the first time. I knew it. My instincts usually don’t fail me. Jessie that’s wonderful. Were you successful?”
“No.”
“No? Why not?”
“You and Michael came home early. But, it was all for the best.”
“You haven’t been with anyone since Antonio, at least that you’ve mentioned, so Brian must be something special.”
“Téa, I tried to seduce him knowing he had a girlfriend. I mean it didn’t work, but after everyone had gone to bed I was still hoping he would come to me last night. He didn’t. Good thing one of us was thinking clearly because I’m not that kind of woman.”
“Brigitte is not exactly his girlfriend. They are dating, but I don’t think their exclusive yet.”
“It doesn’t matter. I’m just so full of emotions right now. And, I don’t even know how to face him. I just hope I haven’t ruined our friendship. It means a lot to me.”
“Brian is a pretty level-headed guy. I know he cares about you a great deal, and obviously you really care about him, too.”
Jessie took a deep breath. It felt good to finally talk about everything that happened all those years ago and to be honest with her feelings. Téa was right about so many things but mostly about feeling guilty about living. Antonio would never have wanted this for her. He would have wanted her to be happy. The problem was Jessie had no idea how to be happy.
“Thank you for always being there Téa.”
“No thanks is necessary. You are the reason I’m here today. I owe you so much for saving my life. The least I can do is offer whatever comfort I can.”
Jessie was about to hug her again, but Téa stopped her, “Wait…can you hug me after your shower because my goodness, you need a good long one?”
For the first time in a long time, Jessie was going to face her demons and she was determined they weren’t going to win.
Chapter 14
It was late afternoon before Jessie finally made it down the stairs to visit with her friends. Téa and Michael were outside on the patio and Brian was sitting with his head bowed over his desk looking intently at some documents. More than likely, he was still going over his script.
Jessie took a few more minutes as she stood outside of his door to gather her courage. She couldn’t hide out in her room all day. She needed to get this over with. So, Jessie took a deep breath and cleared her throat to get Brian’s attention.
His head snapped up, “Hey.”
“I know you’re busy but is it okay if I come in?”
Brian stood up from his desk and waved her inside, “Of course, please come inside. I’m glad you came down because I was sitting here wondering if I should come up to check on you.”
Concern was evident in his eyes.
Jessie walked past the sofa where they’d almost made love and did her best to ignore the feelings that came along with that memory.
She sat down in the chair in front of his desk. Brian sat down, too.
“Jessie is everything okay? Michael said he’d seen you in tears. I hope it wasn’t because of….last night.”
“No, it wasn’t; however, my mind has been very heavy. Today is the anniversary of a very difficult time in my life.”
Brian got up and walked around the front of his desk so that he could be closer to her. He looked deeply into Jessie’s eyes.
“Talk to me. Please. I hate what I see in your eyes. I just want to help.”
“I know you do but maybe another time. Not today, not about that.”
Emotionally, Jessie could only deal with one thing at a time. Right now, she just wanted to be honest with him about her feelings and lay her cards out on the table. She could feel her heart beating through her clothes, “I suppose we should acknowledge the elephant in the room about what happened between us last night.”
Brian could see that Jessie was carrying a huge burden and all he wanted to do was wrap her up in his arms to make that look in her eyes go away. Instead, he gave her a half-smile.
Jessie continued before she lost her nerve, “You are a very important person in my life. I would never want to do anything to…”
Brian cut Jessie off and exhaled loudly, “Oh thank god, me either! I would never want to lose you as a friend. I thought I’d really messed that up. You’re one of the most important people in my life and I’d never do anything to hurt or disrespect you. So, yeah, I agree we should just be friends.”
That wasn’t remotely what Jessie was going to confess. She wanted to tell him that she didn’t want to do anything to make him distrust her. Especially by using his script as an excuse for her behavior last night and that…she’d fallen in love with him. But, he was pretty relieved to think all she wanted was a friendship. Jessie plastered a smile on her face, hoping he wouldn’t see that she was hurt. If all he wanted was a friendship, she’d promised herself that she would bury her feelings and continue to be what he needed.
“Of course…friends. It would probably be better if we just forgot last night even happened.”
Although Brian was relieved that they’d made the decision that their friendship was too important to jeopardize, he still felt….disappointed. His smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Yeah, you’re right.”
Brian stood up from leaning against his desk at the same time Jessie stood up from her chair. It happened so fast that he almost knocked her back into the chair. Brian caught her before she fell backwards. He held her in his arms for a minute longer than necessary. For just an unguarded
