“I hate storms and this one is something else. I just don’t understand why that big gray cloud is always following me around.”
Their easy banter seemed to be returning somewhat, “Dramatic much?”
“Maybe a little.” Still unable to look at him directly she looked around the room, “Where is that bottle of wine? I know I saw some earlier.”
He pointed towards the kitchen, “In the cooler.”
Tasha got up to get it. Tim watched her the entire time as she walked away before realizing he’d been staring at her ass.
It only took a few moments for Tasha to grab the bottle. She poured the wine into her glass as she walked back over to sit down in front of the fire. She sat the bottle right next to her before taking another long sip.
“As far as I can tell, you’re not much of a drinker so you might want to be careful with that wine. It’s pretty potent.”
“Good. I hope it knocks me completely out so that I can sleep through this freaking storm and I don’t have to think about…” She stopped mid-sentence.
Tim prompted her, “About what?”
She couldn’t tell him what she was really thinking. That if things were different they’d be making love and not caring what was going on outside the cabin. “Just…my life and the direction it’s going.” Staring intently into the fire, she continued on “I’m just tired. I’ve got to make some changes in my life.”
Try as hard as he like, he was unable to focus on anything but her and, that dimple on the left side of her cheek when she spoke. It took more effort than he was even aware he possessed to come up with a coherent thought. He just hoped Tasha didn’t notice his battle within. “Like what? What would you change?”
She kept telling herself to keep the conversation light and simple. “I don’t know. My job for one. I hate it and I…I’ve been seriously considering moving some place to start over.”
He couldn’t imagine that. Tim rubbed his chin, “That’s definitely an option but you do know you don’t have to leave the state to do something else.”
She circled the rim of her wine glass, “I know.” She couldn’t say she’d been thinking about moving for a while because being this close to him made her realize she needed more distance. “I’ve lived here all my life. I think I just want a fresh start.”
“Tasha…unresolved issues have a tendency to follow you wherever you go.” He would do anything to keep her close. “I didn’t know you hated your job. What would you like to do?”
“I got my degree in Accounting because it was practical. I do it because I’m good at it. But, I can’t say I love it. It pays the bills…barely.” She sighed, “If I had a choice, I’d like to work with disadvantaged kids.”
“Why didn’t you ever say anything? I’m sure I can find something for you at one of my foundations.”
Tasha closed her eyes and polished off her second glass of wine. That was the last thing she wanted or needed. “Most people hate their jobs, I’m just one of them. I’ll figure something out.”
The wine was starting to do something to her. Tasha was feeling all warm and tingly. She lay down on her side while still facing the fire as she propped herself up on her elbow and cradled her head in her hand.
“My father taught me not to take hand-outs from anybody, especially friends.”
“So, because you have a quality network pipeline that’s a handout? Do you know how many people I hire because they were referred to me from someone? Almost everybody.”
“That’s different.”
“How?”
Tasha thought about it for a minute before throwing her head back and laughing out loud, “It just is dammit! I need another glass of wine. I can still hear the wind outside.”
Tim shook his head, “I think you’re already getting tipsy. You didn’t eat very much. Why don’t you eat a little something before you have another glass?”
Tasha rolled her eyes and poured herself another glass. The wine had definitely loosened her tongue, “I’m fine. Anyway, what’s the worst that could happen if I get pissy drunk? I’m tucked away safely in your cabin. I’ve always felt safe with you.”
It was Tim’s turn to take a long drink of his wine, “Maybe you shouldn’t.”
She could hear the frustrated tone in his voice but tried to ignore it. When she looked over at him he was twirling his wine glass stem between his fingers and staring blindly into the fire. Tasha needed to steer the conversation back to safer ground. Tim spoke again before she could think of something to say.
“When we get back, I’m going to ask Sabrina for a divorce.”
That instantly killed her buzz. Tasha sat up and blinked a few times. She wasn’t sure she had heard him correctly, “What?”
He looked directly into her eyes, “I’m divorcing Sabrina.”
“But…but…I don’t understand? You two love each other.”
“Come on Tasha. Don’t play dumb. You’ve known Sabrina for a very long time. She doesn’t know how to truly love someone.”
”Have you guys tried counseling?”
“Counseling won’t fix the fact that I don’t love her and that we’ve both been unfaithful in this marriage.”
Tasha whispered, “What…what are you talking about?”
“As much as we’re trying to ignore whatever this is between us…it’s not going away.” He took another sip of his wine, “There’s no place you could move to that will change that.”
“Tim, don’t…”
He gave her a hard stare, “Don’t what? Be honest? Do you know how many times I’ve made love to you in my mind?”
She
