The thought gives me pause. “Not right now, but I’m open to it.”
“Then we’re going to have a good relationship here, Mandy. I look forward to working with you. If you need me for anything, the receptionists know how to get in touch with me. Good luck.”
“Thanks.”
And as I get up to leave, for the first time in a long time, I feel hope.
Hope that I’ll be the woman I used to be - only better.
Chapter One
Dalton
“I can take your shift if you need me to.” Wild reaches over, grabbing a chip from the basket in front of us, dipping it into the queso we all love.
“You have enough shit going on in your life, I can take my shift. I’ll ask Denise to watch Walker,” I argue, grabbing a chip of my own.
It’s only been a few days since Mandy left, but it feels like a few months. I miss her, more than I did when she was at the house and I was at the clubhouse. Back then, I always knew I could go there and check on her if need be. Right now, she’s fifty miles north, and I’m going out of my fucking mind, wondering if she’s okay.
But this is part of the process that will, with any luck, make her better, and if it’s going to bring her back to me, I’ll deal with anything thrown my way.
“How’s Walker doing?” he asks as our plates come to the table.
I lean back, admiring the smoking plate of fajitas in front of me. The two of us don’t normally have lunch together, but when he asked, I accepted. It’s nice to get out of my own head for a while. Eating lunch at the shop has gotten super strange, with everyone not sure what to say to me.
“He’s doing okay. I think we’re both just trying to figure out how this is all going to work. Plus I’m a single parent, which I’ve never been before, so that brings with it some new issues I’ve never had to deal with.”
“If you need someone to watch Walker and you can’t find anyone, Addie and I would love to do it. We definitely need the practice.” He ducks his head down, a small smile playing against his lips.
“Wild? For real?”
He grins, nodding quickly. “We told Tyler, Mer, and Caelin a couple of days ago.”
“Did Tyler threaten to kill you?”
“Threatened to make a new mug out of my skull, so take that for what it’s worth.” He shakes his head. “Deep down I know he’s excited. We don’t want to make any kind of announcement after what happened, and I wanted to be the one to tell you myself.”
This is the part that sucks, everyone walks around on eggshells around me. “Never think that your happiness is a part of my grief, my man. I’m stoked for you. The two of you are going to be amazing parents.”
“I hope so. I mean, I didn’t have the greatest of role models, but every single man in the club has taken me under their wing. I hope I can be half of what y’all are.”
“It’s a lot of trial and error.” A nostalgic smile tilts my lips, as I think of Walker when he was a baby. “So much trial and error. But if you’ve ever got any questions, that’s what our group text is for.”
He laughs. “Any way we can keep Tyler out of that text? I feel like the first time I ask a question, he’s gonna be like dumbass can’t take care of my daughter, much less my grandkid - hang on, I’ll be over in a minute to straighten everything out.”
I chuckle loudly, something I need in a desperate way. “Sounds just like him.”
“He loves Addie, he’d do anything for her, and we’re both lucky to have him, but damn if he isn’t intimidating.”
“Liam’s intimidating, too.” I take a bite of my fajita.
“Not as bad as Tyler, though.”
“You’re married to Tyler’s daughter, I’m married to Liam’s. Think about it.”
He makes a noise of understanding before he dives into his food. For a second, I glance at my wedding ring. The day Mandy put it on me, I was so sure shit was behind us. When she’d been pregnant with Walker, I’d been stupid, trying to keep her safe, and I selfishly assumed that was the only hard time we’d have to live through.
But I didn’t think this would happen.
Neither one of us did.
“Look.” Wild takes his phone out, showing me a positive pregnancy test along with a sonogram picture. “This is the announcement we’re gonna make in the group text and on Facebook for friends and family. She did a good job, huh?”
My eyes travel down to the picture, where Ranger - a dog they adopted almost a year ago now - sits on their front porch, wearing a shirt that says Promoted to Big Brother. We’d gotten Walker the same shirt to wear on the day we had the baby. It’s still in the nursery, packed away now.
My throat swells and I do my best to swallow against the intrusion. “Addie did a real good job.” I cough to try and loosen the muscles. “Be right back.”
Before he even says anything I’m heading for the men’s room. I head in, looking under the stalls to make sure I’m by myself. Hurriedly I move to lock the door and it’s only then I let myself collapse against it, and tears fall.
Tears have come more often than they should have lately with all of us.
But I can’t stop. My ass slides down the door until I’m sitting with my back against it, my face in my hands, sobbing like my life is over.
In some ways I feel like it is, and I’m never sure if I’m going to be able to get it back.
“I’m sorry if I brought up bad memories,” Wild says as we park at the
