Cows didn’t care if your heart was broken.
When she finally slunk down to breakfast, it was late. And the only one in the kitchen was Iris.
“All right,” Iris said, putting her hands on her hips. “It’s time for you to tell me what’s going on.”
Rose looked at her. “You never meddle.”
“I am about to meddle hard-core. Because you’re upset, and I can tell. And things have changed over the last few weeks, and you were baking cookies for Logan Heath, and I need to know what’s going on.”
“I...” She found herself helpless to find the words, and the more she searched for them, the more it all hurt. Her eyes began to fill with tears, much to her horror, and then one escaped. “I... I think my heart is broken,” she said. “I’m so... I didn’t want this. I didn’t want any of this. I wanted to do something for you. I wanted to set you up with somebody, and I ruined that, I hurt you. And somehow... Somehow it made everything go wrong between me and Logan. There was just supposed to be a blacksmithing demonstration, and then he got mad at me, and he backed me against the wall. And then... And then we kissed.” She closed her eyes. “He was mad at me. Because Elliott wanted me and I didn’t know. And he warned me. He did. He told me I didn’t know what it looked like when a man wanted me.” She shook her head. “I didn’t. I wish I could go back to not knowing. I was so thrilled with myself. So thrilled that I had uncovered the mysteries of the universe.”
“The mysteries of the universe?” Iris asked.
“Well. Predominantly what men look like naked in person. I just thought... That I was in some kind of golden age of discovery. I guess I am. I guess I’m discovering. What it’s like when you find someone. What it’s like when you lose them. It’s not fair. We lost Mom and Dad—why do I have to lose him, too?”
Iris sat down heavily at the table. “Are you telling me that you slept with Logan?”
“Yes. A lot of times. Like, a lot of times in the last month. A very lot of them.”
“Oh.” The look of absolute distress on Iris’s face would have almost been funny if Rose didn’t feel devastated down to the very bottom of her soul.
“I thought I knew what I was getting into,” Rose continued. “But I didn’t. I thought that because I wasn’t really all that romantic and I didn’t have a lot of fantasies about finding the right guy and settling down and getting married that I would be safe. That I could just... Well, he’s really hot.”
“Very hot. Yeah.”
“It’s all fun and games until you fall in love. Or realize you’ve been in love forever, or on the verge of it. I don’t really know. Do you believe in soul mates?”
Iris blinked. “I thought you weren’t a romantic.”
“I wasn’t. And now I am. Do you believe in them?”
“Well,” Iris said, her words short and clipped, “I am a romantic. So yes. I’ve always believed in that. And I guess I have always believed that...that there could be magic between two people. And you might be able to just find the one. And have there only be the one. I...I would really like to be someone’s...one.” She cleared her throat and looked away. “And I’ve never really believed in hooking up just for the sake of it.”
“Well, I thought I could. But I think I found my soul mate instead. But he doesn’t want to be my soul mate. And what are you supposed to do with that?”
“I don’t know, Rose,” Iris said. “I really don’t.”
Her sister took a deep breath, and it was as if she had conducted a miniature rally inside of herself. “But here’s what I know about you. You’re strong. You were strong for me. And you’ll be strong through this. I can’t tell you how you’ll survive. I just know that you will.”
And right then, she felt the lack of their mother more than she had in a very long time. She knew they both did. Because right about now they could both use a word from someone who knew more than they did. Someone who had wisdom and experience.
Well, they didn’t have that.
But between them they had a whole lot of love. That was what they’d always had here at Hope Springs.
Love enough to cover the shortcomings.
Except, she didn’t seem to be able to cover this thing with Logan.
He has to fix it himself.
She didn’t know where that voice came from, so certain.
But it was there, resonating in her heart.
She could only take it so far. And the rest was going to have to be his choice. She’d made a lot of choices over the past month. She’d let go of a lot of her past pain. Or at least, figured out how to allow it to exist alongside the feelings of love that she had for him.
She reached across the table and squeezed her sister’s hand. “Thank you for loving me. Even when I’m a pain in the butt.”
“Rose, I love you especially when you’re a pain in the butt. Because it makes me feel... I love who you are. I love that you’re so brave.”
“I really don’t feel all that brave right now. I feel kind of bruised.”
“Yeah. Well.” Her sister’s face looked thoughtful. “Sometimes I think you have to be bruised to get really brave. And I’m sure that you can do that. I’m sure that you can take this and turn yourself into the best Rose yet. Whether or not he’ll do the same...”
“That’s up to him,” Rose said. “But I kicked him out of the ranch.”
Iris actually laughed. “You what?”
“I kicked him out,” she said fiercely. “Because he’s an asshole. And I’m not going to work with
