‘Okay, so, you know I’m shitting myself?’
‘Of course.’
‘I’m facing my fears head-on.’
‘I know that.’
Three short, sharp breaths.
‘And you’re about to do the same.’
His body becomes tense.
‘What do you mean?’
My heart jitters. It’s crunch time.
‘The first thing you need to know is this …’ Oh shit, it’s gone. Now it’s time for the grand performance, I seem to have forgotten every last bit of my rehearsed speech. In the absence of anything else, I opt for the usual incoherent babbling. ‘I’ve messed up. When I thought we were over, I stopped taking the pill, and then in New York I got carried away, and then I was going to sort it out, but I never got round to it in time, and I didn’t sort it out, and well, your Gentleman’s Relish, it’s taken effect.’
‘Relish?’
‘There’s a bun in my oven.’ I smile uneasily. ‘And you put it there.’ Oh, just say the words … ‘I’m pregnant.’
His lips part. His forehead furrows. I watch the blue irises harden. He shakes his head and suddenly my pulse is racing. Is he annoyed? Angry? Pissed off that I’ve gone and done this behind his back? I reach up and close his mouth.
‘You’re going to be a dad.’
‘Pregnant?’
‘Sorry.’
He blinks a few times, shakes his head again, and then goes back to staring at me.
‘Are you angry?’
‘No,’ he answers quickly. ‘You’re pregnant?’
‘Yes.’
‘A baby?’
‘Yes.’
‘You’re going to have a baby?’
‘Yes.’
His eyes lose focus.
‘Dan, are you alright?’
‘A baby …’
‘This is shock, isn’t it?’
‘Yes.’
‘Good shock?’
‘Probably.’
‘So … you’re okay with it?’
‘Okay with it?’ He takes a few, deep breaths. ‘Of course I’m okay with it. A baby … it’s … yeah … a baby.’ The ghost of a smile flits across his face. It’s quickly banished by disbelief. ‘But fucking hell, Maya, you’re pregnant, scared of heights and we’re on the fucking London Eye?’
‘I’m fine.’
‘Oh yeah, right.’
‘Yeah, right. Now let go of me.’
His arms tighten.
‘No. You’ll go into meltdown.’
‘Let. Go. Of. Me.’
‘No.’
‘I’m going to be sick,’ I lie.
And that does it.
‘For fuck’s sake.’
As soon as his grip loosens, I pull away and try to compose myself. It’s not easy. We’re already ascending above the trees in Jubilee Gardens, and worse than that, I’m being subjected to a Daniel Foster glare.
‘Of all the mad things you’ve ever done,’ he growls, raising a finger at me, ‘this takes the fucking biscuit. You’re putting our baby at risk …’
‘Oh, calm the fuck down,’ I growl back. ‘As long as you stay calm, I’ll be fine. And stop pointing at me.’
Still glaring, he lowers his hand.
‘Now … I want you to turn around.’
‘What?’
He cocks his head. The glare disappears. It’s replaced by confusion.
‘And I want you to listen.’
Slowly, the realisation dawns on him. He knows exactly why I’ve lured him onto the Eye, landing him with the pregnancy bombshell as we rise into the air. And what’s more, he already knows who’s standing behind him, who sneaked in, unnoticed, while he was dealing with an anxious fruitcake of a fiancée. He looks out of the pod, his eyes flitting sightlessly across London’s rooftops.
‘Well done,’ he whispers.
‘I’m sorry, but this was all I could think of. And it’s done now, so you’d better get on with it.’
He nods at me, and turns. I stumble over to the bench at the centre of the carriage, plant myself on it, grip the edge and stare at my shoes. As Layla’s voice wafts through my head, I can only imagine the expressions flitting across his face.
‘Hi, Dan.’
Well, at least she’s calm. And considering what happened the last two times she tried to make contact, that’s a bloody miracle. I sit and wait, every muscle clenched in preparation for a nasty scene. I’m shocked when he simply says her name.
‘Layla.’
‘Please don’t panic.’
No answer.
‘I know you want to kick and scream and get out of here, but so does Maya.’
‘You knew she was pregnant?’ he asks.
I’m assuming she nods.
‘But I didn’t know she was scared of heights.’
I manage to look up, and find her shaking her head at me. I’m getting a silent telling-off from my future sister-in-law. But that doesn’t bother me. I’m more concerned about the man who’s standing between us, currently fixated on the floor. The desperation’s clear to see, in the quick rise and fall of his chest, the blank expression in his eyes, the twitching fingers. I just want to throw my arms around him and tell him everything’s going to be fine.
‘Pregnancy aside,’ Layla goes on. ‘If Maya can take it, so can you.’
‘I don’t exactly have much choice, but I suppose that was all part of the plan.’
‘Sure was,’ I tell him, blithely. ‘Let’s call it revenge for all those times you trapped me. There’s no getting out of this, Dan. You can’t run. And you need to stay calm for my sake.’
He nods, returning his attention to the floor.
Well, I reassure myself, at least he’s not whirling about like an octopus on acid… not yet at any rate.
‘Let’s just get this out in the open,’ Layla begins. ‘Maya told me what happened. You were the one. You beat him up.’ She’s talking quickly, clearly determined to reach the end point before he implodes. ‘And first of all, I want you to know this. I don’t blame you. I saw what he did to you, I saw how he behaved, and I don’t blame you at all.’
