Tourists are everywhere, and those obviously single women aren’t backward in coming forward. I try to ignore them and instead strike up a conversation with the bartender, Marco. It’s unlike me, but I need a distraction, and if those women eyeing me think I’m gay, that works in my favour.
“So, this the only bar in the complex?” I ask him, looking around and trying to get the lay of the land.
“Yep, although there is a club on site, too. This place is more for the day and lazy evenings. We also provide food.” He tells me, his broken English better than my broken Portuguese.
“Food?” I question.
A phone behind the bar starts ringing, and he chucks me a menu as he turns to answer it.
“Ola!” he greets as I turn my eye to the menu.
I expect it to be all bar food—hot dogs, fries, burgers, and the like—but am impressed when I see it’s a restaurant-worthy menu.
“It’s good, no?” he questions.
“Yeah. I didn’t expect you to have this much selection,” I reply.
He shrugs. “The tourists don’t always like to travel far, so it helps to have it on site.”
“You mean they’re fucking lazy,” I reply with a chuckle.
He just smiles as I grab my bottle and down my beer. I go back to watching the pool area slightly to the left of the bar until another phone call grabs my attention.
“Si, One, One, Five, Landsdown. Thirty minutes.”
The address repeats in my head until I realise it’s Via’s villa address.
“You do deliveries, Marco?”
“Si,” he answers.
I stand and throw a tip on the counter.
“Adios,” Marco calls to me.
I nod my head and make my way back toward the villas now I know she’s there. I’ve waited too long. I need to see her, feel her, touch her. She needs to know that I love her, no matter what, and I’ll beg her to look past my darkness.
Making my way to her villa, I see lights on out the back and can hear voices, so I walk around to the back gate.
I realise too late I should have knocked on the front door, I should have texted or called her first… I should’ve never got on that plane.
“So what now? It’s been nearly a month since we were kidnapped. Don’t you think that you need to talk to him?” I recognise the voice as Via’s roommate, Helena.
There’s a slight rustle followed by a low groan, and I step closer so I can see them both. They’re lying on a couple of sun loungers, Helena’s facing Via, but my girl is staring into the sky. She’s wearing sunglasses, but I can still see the stiffness of her body.
“You know I texted him. I wanted to make things right, but he ignored me.”
“We went over this, Liv, you need to try again.”
“Hel. Please stop it. He came to pick me up for Uncle Dane’s funeral.”
“Fuck, he did? You didn’t mention it.”
The tension washes away as Via’s body slumps on the lounger. “He was so cold, Hel. His face was blank, and when he didn’t come in without me asking him, I realised that there was such a wedge between us. Apart from giving me a little comfort at the funeral, he pretty much ignored me. He had his chance, I know it was a funeral, but he could have said something, anything. Hell, he could have asked to meet with me a week later. He did nothing, Hel, nothing.”
“So, Liv? You can still fix it.”
I watch as Via sits up on the lounger, swinging her lithe tattooed legs over the side and proceeds to shred my heart, which is no less than I deserve.
“Honestly, Hel? His kiss with Shelly is burned into my brain. I think that was to push me away, but it killed me… it fucking killed me,” she whispers the last part, swiping her finger past her left eye. “Even after that, I texted him, gave him the chance to talk to me. He didn’t take his chance.” Via hangs her head. “I wonder if there is a reason for that. Maybe Isaac is trying to let me down gently? Or, maybe the universe is telling me to give up.” She shrugs and raises her head again to look at Helena. “Either way, I’m done. It’s too painful, and I can’t go through it anymore. I can’t keep breaking because one day I might not recover.” Via stands gathering her bottle of water and pushing her sunglasses on top of her head. She stares at Helena with pure belief in her words. “Maybe one day Isaac James will be ready, maybe he’ll be able to give himself over to another person, to love another person completely. Hopefully, he can be honest and good, and everything a woman needs. Maybe one day, but that day isn’t today, and that person isn’t me.”
In that moment, my Via disappears. Olivia McKenna morphs in front of me, and I know, without a shadow of a doubt that I’ve lost her. She’s gone… and so has my heart.
LIV
ONE YEAR LATER
With my black leather cap and the tiny lingerie set, I prowl on stage to ‘Weak’ by SWV. The dances are different these
