“I’m happy I could help,” she said, ever the diplomat even as his nose almost brushed her with its closeness. Her heart—oh, her poor reckless heart—threw itself against her ribcage, banging to get out. A strong hand landed on her right cheek. His pulse was as fast as hers.
“Why did you come to my house in the first place? And why did you stay?”
“I just didn’t want you to be alone anymore.”
“And I don’t want to be alone anymore. But I don’t want you to be alone anymore either,” he said.
A pause. A lifetime of happiness hung in the balance of that pause. Kate said nothing. She didn’t know how.
“May I kiss you?”
“Only if you want me to fall in love with you.”
Chapter Fifteen
Despite what his boarding school roommates or overly friendly colleagues in the office thought, Clark had kissed women before. They never set his soul on fire as they seemed to do in the movies, nor did they live up to the locker room banter thrown around by the men in his acquaintance, nor was it a gentlemanly thing to do, so he never bragged about his romantic encounters.
Now, he thanked his past self for never inflating the memories or exaggerating the stories. They only would have cheapened the most perfect kiss in all the world.
His lips brushed hers, featherlight at first, not wanting to push his luck. Everything about her was soft, the perfect contrast to his rough edges and tough exterior. His hands moved to gently cup her face and he drew her lips into his for real this time. The slightest pressure, and the kiss exploded into a final firework of connection. His heart caught fire and his eyes were blinded to everything but her as she responded in kind. The kiss spoke louder than any words they could have said or wishes they could have made.
Given how much he despised it, he never expected the most important moment of his life to happen with Christmas songs being sung in the background. This morning, the moment would have been ruined by the inclusion of “O Come, All Ye Faithful.” But then again, this morning, he wouldn’t have fallen in love with Kate Buckner.
He was so glad not to be the same man he was this morning.
When the kiss broke—too soon, as far as he was concerned—the dark world brightened and he tipped his forehead against hers. Thoughts like stars hung around his head, too many to count or hold onto. He wanted to kiss her again and again and again and ask her everything about her life. Did she like gray or blue better? When did she last laugh so hard she snorted? What movie always made her cry? How did he start to make her as happy as she’d made him?
“Wow.”
Clark couldn’t count on one hand how many times before today he’d ever said wow. He added it to the list of things Kate inspired in him. He now understood how to let go of his need to seem above everything. He embraced wonder.
“Yeah.” A disbelieving sigh came from her smiling lips. How many times had she been kissed? However many it was, he hoped she liked his kiss the best. He was a competitive type. “Wow.”
Turning her so they looked out over the town again, Clark pulled Kate in close, throwing an arm over her shoulder again. He loved this pose. So protective. So close. In this position, she could listen to his heartbeat and know it was real, know she made it race every time she spoke. He swept his free arm across the glittering landscape of houses and businesses, all lit from the inside. Identifying with a building didn’t seem a particularly smart thing to do, but Clark did all the same. Each of those houses looked so dark on the outside. Night painted their exterior walls. But their windows revealed the truth. The light within spilled into the streets, promising warmth and comfort inside. He felt like that now, trapped in night but carrying a raging fire in his chest. A fire Kate started.
“I think I see what you’re talking about with this Christmas stuff now.”
“It’s amazing, isn’t it?”
“It’s magic.”
“No.” She gave him a little shoulder shove. The smile she no doubt wore echoed in her voice. “It’s love. Better than magic.”
“I don’t like telling people they were right and I was wrong,” he admitted. Kate changed his life, sure. She opened up new worlds of possibilities in just a day… Still, old habits die hard. In business, he never said sorry or admitted fault. He barreled forward without regard for those beside or behind him. With Kate, he wanted to accept her love of him and this holiday, but he wasn’t sure if his lips knew how to form the words necessary to admit his fault.
“You don’t have to tell me. I already know.” By now, he knew any time she sounded smug, she was really teasing. He groaned anyway.
“That’s even worse.”
“Then go ahead. Tell me I’m right and you love Christmas now and you’re a big fat softie,” she punctuated those last three words with pokes right into his gut. “Who believes in miracles and that you deserve good things.”
You deserve good things. The pokes to his gut didn’t knock the wind out of him, but that sentence certainly did. A lifetime of neglect told him the exact opposite.
“I wouldn’t go that far. I’m just not used to being given anything. Even though my uncle did try, I didn’t want to be given anything. When I was young, I was always battling a ghost, you know? I worked myself to the bone at school and college and then at work because I needed to make my parents proud. I needed to carry on their legacy, and I had to fight every step of the way to do it. You’re just
