Chapter 25
Hadleigh
It’s not helping my current state of mind that I’ve only had two-point-two hours of sleep. I’d come in early, figuring there was no reason to lie around in the bed moping, so I figured I’d at least be productive by getting some grading done. Piper, Jake, and Brian were already in when I got here. Considering it was a full hour before school starts, I’d been extremely surprised when Sawyer had also shown up early.
I feel awful. Sawyer doesn’t deserve to be treated like this, and it’s obvious from the bags under his eyes and rumpled hair that he didn’t get much sleep, either. I don’t know what to do about Ed, though, and my first inclination is to push Sawyer away, to protect him from whatever crap Ed decides to fling my way. I don’t want Sawyer to be taken down with me if Ed truly intends to somehow use those photos against me. And if he decides to tell everyone that Sawyer and I are together? Well, I don’t know what to do.
I’m so lost in thought I startle when Sawyer lightly touches my arm. My heart rate picks up, but I don’t look at him. I can’t. He sinks into the chair beside me, propping his elbow on the little student desk and resting his head on his fisted hand. I feel his hot gaze on me, and finally, I can’t handle it anymore. I have to look at him, so I angle my head his way. My eyes move over the rugged features of his handsome face, and I want to cry. He definitely seems exhausted, the same way I am.
His voice is low enough when he speaks that only I can hear it. “Are you mad at me about something?”
When I don’t answer right away, he swallows visibly before lifting one hand like he’s about to touch me, but then he lets it drop, like he’s thought better of it.
I blink rapidly and try to control my breathing. I’m so overwhelmed by what I should and shouldn’t do that I can barely think, much less formulate an answer. Finally, I shake my head and murmur, “No.”
He glances at Brian as he leaves the room, then at Piper and Jake, whose desks face the opposite direction before he leans in and feathers a kiss over my cheekbone. “I don’t understand what’s happened. Do you want to clue me in?”
My heart clenches and claws within my chest. “Okay. But can we talk after school? I want to be as professional as I can be with you during school hours.”
His brows pinch together and he looks at me curiously. “Um, yeah. That makes sense. I’ll—I’ll just go get ready for class.” He gets up, shaking his head to himself. With a lingering glance at me over his shoulder, he leaves the workroom. I wonder if he knows that he just walked out of here with a tiny little piece of my heart.
Jake and Piper chatter behind me, but I’m so caught up in worrying about how to handle Ed I can’t even join in on the conversation. I feel terrible for the way I’m making Sawyer question what’s between us, but he doesn’t know I’m trying to keep him out of trouble. With a disgusted groan, I allow myself to think through everything again.
It figures. Just when I’m about to get everything I’ve ever wanted my world blows up in my face. I wish I could stop breaking my own damn heart. I wish I had never gone out with Ed in the first place. I still can’t fathom why I’d said yes or why I’d stayed with him when I wasn’t happy. And then when he’d taken those photos without my permission? I should have known better. I should have seen him for the creep he truly is. But nope. It’d taken him sending me the same photos weeks later—photos he’d sworn he’d deleted—to know for sure that he’s a complete asshole.
Being with Sawyer, though? He can’t be a mistake. I won’t let him be. Nothing has ever felt as right. It makes my heart ache to know I’m hurting him. But I don’t want to drag him into this. And because I’m trying to hide this from him, he’s confused, and it’s all my fault.
I’m falling for Sawyer and that makes this whole Ed situation that much more difficult. I don’t know which would be worse for us, if Ed were to say something to the administration about me and Sawyer or if he were to do something with the photos he’d taken and kept. I’d put nothing past him.
Ed’s plenty pissed off and it came through in the tone of his texts. The only way I can see to protect Sawyer is to try and stay on Ed’s good side. But how do I do that? I don’t want any part of him, and I don’t want to just give in. I won’t go back to him. I won’t. No way in hell.
Later in the day, when the door to the workroom opens during our lunch period, my heart does a little leap. Screw waiting until after school. We need to find somewhere to talk before I go out of my mind worrying about this. I look up expectantly, plastering a brave smile on my face, ready to skip lunch and talk things through if that’s what Sawyer wants.
Unfortunately for me, it’s not Sawyer standing in the doorway. It’s Ed.
“Hey, Hadleigh.” He rubs a hand over the coarse stubble on his jawline. “I know you’re probably pissed about the text messages, but I want to talk to you about giving us another chance. What do you say we go out for dinner and talk things through?” He’s looking at me the way he used to when I first agreed to go out with him last fall—when he was actually trying to make
