“Lena. Look at me.” He nudges me with his hand still on my face, forcing me to stare into his eyes. “Leaving Providence was the hardest decision I ever had to make. But it was also the easiest. If I had to do it all over again, I would. But if you had told me that you wanted to stay here in Seattle, I wouldn’t have argued. Don’t ever feel like you’re a burden to me. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for you. I wouldn’t be the man I am today without you. We’ve built this life of ours. No matter how messy it may get, we’re in this together. I realize we can’t keep running forever and I understand why you were hesitant to tell me.”
I nod, my body relaxing. It’s as if I’ve opened the flood gates. All the worry, all the doubt, and all the anger are simply gone. Despite telling Logan about the emails, I know I’m still leaving out another detail.
“The emails aren’t the only signs I’ve been getting that Julian is back.”
Logan leans his head to the side, concern in his expression. He holds his breath.
“That day I went for the meeting with Candace and you asked if I had come home early, I didn’t. I was still in Tacoma when the security system was used. That’s why I had you change the code.”
Logan stands up out of his chair. He raises his arms, placing his hands on his head. His shirt rises, exposing the planes of his waist, his muscles carved into a deep ‘v’. Using his hands, he slides his hair back, moving it out of his face. He spins in a circle, releasing a heavy breath.
I shake my head, swallowing back my emotions. “I’m so sorry, Logan. I really should have told you.”
“No.” He holds his hand out, focusing on the back yard. His back is turned toward me, shielding his face from me. “I asked you to tell me everything. I just need a moment to process this.”
“Okay.” I lean back in my seat, breathing in the morning air. It’s still early, dew still dotted along the grass.
Logan stays standing in silence for a few moments and I stay seated. After last night, I thought Logan would be furious to know I’d kept this from him. Instead, he remains calm. Finally, he decides to turn back around, his hands resting on his hips.
“There’s something I need to tell you, too.”
I sit up in my chair, my back peeling off the metal. Shit, we had more secrets between us than I was aware of.
“I think someone has been following me too. I mean...” He scratches the scruff lining his jaw. “I’ve had this feeling. I can’t explain it. I haven’t seen Julian but it’s like he’s hiding in the shadows. I felt it the day I was at the Market with Natalie. I think that’s how those pictures were taken. He’s trying to make it look like I’m having an affair.”
“That makes sense.” I swallow my uncertain feelings about Natalie, pushing my jealousy aside. Logan wasn’t having an affair; I knew it deep in my bones.
“Did you tell Max about Natalie kissing you?” It hadn’t occurred to me until now to ask him. Natalie risked everything by kissing Logan. Not only was he her boss, but he was also married. I didn’t understand how she fit into all this.
“No.” He sighs. “I didn’t, only because Natalie told me about how hard she’s worked for her career. It was also strange because after she kissed me and I turned her down, it was like she had flipped a switch.”
“What do you mean?”
“She started begging me not to fire her or tell Max.” He walks closer to me, keeping his hands on his hips. He stares at me in thought. “Why would Natalie jeopardize her entire career by kissing me, then beg me not to tell anyone? It may not seem that strange, but I can’t seem to forget what she said to me that night.”
“What did she say?”
“She said she didn’t expect to fall in love with the job.” Logan groans. “Maybe I’m overthinking it. Right?”
“I don’t know.” I twist my mouth in thought.
He sits back down in his chair, his expression still clouded in thought. Nothing made sense anymore, but I couldn’t deny the relief I felt. It felt good to finally get everything out in the open with Logan. My demons weren’t mine anymore. Logan and I have been riding on two separate waves, unknowingly. They were the same current, same temperature. Now, our waves had crashed into one another, we’re riding them out together.
I sit up from my chair and stand in front of Logan. He lifts his head, looking up at me. Placing both my hands around Logan’s face, I brush my fingers in his long hair.
“Thank you for coming back to me,” he says, the sun reflecting in his eyes.
“There was never any question I was coming back, Logan.” He wraps his hands around the back of my legs. My skin tingles feeling him so close. He pulls me closer to him, parting his legs farther. “I just needed some time.”
“I missed you when you weren’t here. I want you around.”
“I was safe with Abby,” I reassure him. “But I missed you too.”
He narrows his eyes, leaning into my touch. “Do you think we should tell Abby we think Julian could be around?”
I sigh. Just like with Logan, I didn’t want
