I nodded. “One of the great shames in my family. My grandparents raised me like I was their own child. I believe the folks in town thought I was my mother’s sister instead of her daughter. Needless to say, my pa-pa tightened his security, making it impossible for my mother to slip past his watch again.”
“Where is your father?”
I chuckled. “Your guess is better than mine.”
He shook his head. “His loss, had he known who he fathered and abandoned, he'd kick his own a$$!”
“Aww! That’s so sweet!” I hugged him.
This man had an amazing ability to make me feel good, and here I thought it was just in the bedroom.
“Let me guess, it was your pa-pa's idea for you to start wearing the disguise?”
I nodded. “By the time I turned sixteen, I had enough of being secluded on that farm. My days were spent reading books after books... my pa-pa's idea of homeschooling. Before my mother and grandmother died, it had been them who were in charge of my education. My grandmother was a retired teacher. When she died, I begged my pa-pa to let me go to school, but of course, he wouldn't have it. He got real offended and acted like I hurt his feelings. He say, ‘what you think I can't teach you a thing or two’.” I said that in my pa-pa voice causing Gabriel to chuckle.
“And of course he moped around the house till I made him some, I feel guilty tarts.” I gestured back to the tray of tarts.
“Wait!” He asked sitting up a bit in his chair. “Those are your, I feel guilty tarts?”
I nodded. “Yeah.”
“So, you made those for me cause you felt guilty?”
I nodded. This made him laugh. He sat back in his chair shaking his head.
“Damn baby, you full of surprises. Go ahead, continue with your story.”
I got so caught up in his humor I forgot where I was in my story.
“Where was I?”
“You turned sixteen and wanted out.” He supplied.
“Oh yeah, so I told my granddaddy I can't take it no more. I want to go to the mall! And didn't want to hear none of his speeches about how dangerous the world was outside of our farm. I was yelling and stomping my feet, and I told him I wouldn't bake another thing, and our business was going to go belly up and flop.”
“I have a question.” He interrupted. “When you yelled at him, were you, sick?” He held up air quote. At first, I didn't know what he meant, but then he gestured toward the lower half of me.
“Oh! You’re asking if I was on my period?” With a grin on his face, he nodded.
“Hmmm, let me think.” That's what I told him, but I remembered it like it was yesterday. Yes, I was on my period, but because I already know what point he was trying to make, and I was not going to feed into it, I played dumb.
“You know, it was so long ago, I don't remember.”
The grin he had on his face reminded me of Kenny’s. It’s the one he wears when he's trying to hold on to a laugh.
“You can't remember?” He asked.
I shook my head. “Nope, I cannot recall.”
He burst, laughing at me. “Yeah right, you can't remember!”
I pressed my lips together to try not to laugh with him. “Do you want to hear the rest of the story or not?”
Still chuckling he nodded. “Sorry, go ahead.”
I rolled my eyes at him. “Anyway, my pa-pa says that the only way he'll take me to the mall is if I wear a disguise. So I was like, heck yeah. If you take me to the mall I'll ride backwards on Ms. Willie Mae's bipolar bull.”
Gabe frowned. “Who is Ms. Willie Mae?”
“She owns the land next to ours.”
“How do you know her bull is bipolar?” He asked the question as if he was afraid of the answer.
“She said the vet told her so.”
He made a sound in his throat once again wearing the Kenny grin. His body was doing these little jerks because he was trying not to laugh in my face.
“I don't know what's so funny!” I admonished. “William is, as you would say, crazy as hell!”
“Who is William?” He asked in a voice strained with his suppressed laughter.
“Ms. Willie Mae's bipolar bull, she named him after herself.”
That was it, he burst. Laughing so hard tears came out his eyes. I stared at him crossed between being amazed and insulted. Amazed because I ain't never seen him laugh that hard. And insulted because he didn't know the hell of a time William had given us when he found his way across the fence line.
“I'll have you know that William once chased my pa-pa damn near around our whole forty-seven acres. Pa-pa was hollering, ‘help me, this crazy a$$ bull trying to kill me’. I had to get the shot gun and let out a couple of shots in his direction to get him to stop chasing poor pa-pa.”
The whole time I spoke Gabe laughed. He was clutching his side at this point.
“Wait bae! Stop!” He covered my mouth the way I often did his. I folded my arms and watched him get himself together.
“I bet if you met William you wouldn't think he was all that funny!” This caused him to collapse in more laughter, nearly unseating me. The only thing keeping me from tumbling off his lap was his arm that was still wrapped around my waist.
“Oh sh*t!” He yelled out trying to get control of himself. “Shorty, I ain't laughed like this since I was a kid, damn!”
After a minute he got himself together. I think the fact that I wasn't laughing with him only made the matter funnier to him, but I knew what William was capable of, and trust me, it wasn't nothing funny about it.
“Okay! Okay!” He said trying to catch his
