Casey inhaled slowly, gathering her thoughts. Jacqueline wasreally trying here and she supposed she should, too. “Today was my fault. Youplanned this whole day just for me—trying to give me the relaxing time Ineeded. It was a sweet gesture, and I got caught up in the moment.”
“So, it would have happened with anyone who took you out for theday?” Jacqueline stood a little straighter, as if she preparing to flee if herfeelings got hurt.
“Of course not. But given our history, is it really a surprise?”
“I suppose not.”
“I didn’t stop wanting to kiss you just because we decided not tostay together.”
Jacqueline’s expression changed, and Casey felt her shift into anoffensive mode. “We didn’t decide. You did.”
“You didn’t put up much of a fight.”
“We’d been fighting for so long, I was exhausted. I washeartbroken over Elle, and instead of trying to understand, you just keptpushing. Like you always did. You had to control everything in our lives.”
“That’s not true.” Casey straightened, now, prepared to defendherself.
“It is. From day one. You decided I should ask for your numberthat day. You decided we would foster Sean—”
“And I’ve never regretted—”
“I haven’t either. I wouldn’t trade him for anything. But can youreally say I could have talked you out of it?”
Casey didn’t say anything.
“You determined when our relationship was over.”
“That’s not fair. Okay, I made the final call, but we were onthat road—”
“You decided. And, you’re right. I didn’t fight. I was hurting sobadly that I convinced myself letting you go couldn’t feel any worse thanholding on.” Jacqueline took a step toward her, the anguish in her eyes rippinga hole in Casey’s soul. “But I was wrong. Being without you was a hundred timesmore painful.”
Casey closed the space between them in the time it tookJacqueline to draw another breath. She wrapped one hand around the back ofJacqueline’s neck and pulled her in, her other hand catching her around thewaist as their lips met. She poured all of the emotions she couldn’t voice intothis kiss—the sadness, the regrets, and her grief. Jacqueline’s hands slippedunder the hem of her shirt, and she ran her hands possessively up Casey’s back,urging her closer, as she deepened the kiss.
Jacqueline surged against her, and the edge of the countertop bitinto her lower back. Casey pushed her hands into Jacqueline’s hair and rakedher nails against her scalp. Her need to get closer—to feel more—quicklyoutpaced her common sense. She’d had only a taste of Jacqueline in these pasteight years, and those encounters were laced with remorse. Being without you was a hundredtimes more painful. Jacqueline’s suffering, laid bare in thosewords, had paralleled her own so perfectly. And, she’d felt, touchingher—kissing her—was the only way to soothe them both.
Wait.The word echoed in Casey’s practical mind, but it never reached her lips. AsJacqueline’s mouth moved to her neck, Casey dropped her head back, and the wordthat escaped her was very different. “Bed.”
Chapter Eighteen
“Bed.”
Jacqueline shook her head in the hollowof Casey’s neck. She lifted Casey onto the counter and moved between herthighs. “Here.”
Casey wrapped her legs around Jacqueline’s waist. Jacqueline’shands blazed under her shirt, leaving a trail of goose bumps across herstomach. Jacqueline shoved the flannel shirt off her shoulders and pulled herT-shirt over her head. She removed her own shirt, dropped it on the floorbehind her, and pressed close to Casey.
Casey trembled. Jacqueline’s arms around her—her breath againsther skin as she kissed her collarbone—felt like coming home. She cradledJacqueline’s jaw and guided their mouths back together. When Jacqueline slippedher hands beneath the waistband of her spandex pants, Casey planted her handsagainst Jacqueline’s chest and shoved her backward.
Jacqueline stared at her, her expression a mix of desire andconfusion. “I’m sorry.”
Casey slid off the counter and grabbed Jacqueline’s hands,keeping her close. “You’ve been with enough women to know that apologizingisn’t a turn-on.”
“You’re not just another—”
“I wasn’t stopping.” Casey closed her teeth on Jacqueline’searlobe, knowing Jacqueline’s weaknesses better than her own. “We just need alittle more room to move.”
Keeping hold of Jacqueline’s hand, she headed toward her bedroom.She glanced at the bed as they entered, having intended to shove Jacquelinedown and have her way with her. But feeling Jacqueline’s hands in the tightband of her workout pants reminded her that she’d been hiking less than an hourago. She needed Jacqueline’s hands on every inch of her, and she didn’t want tobe self-conscious. So, instead, she led Jacqueline into the master bathroom andturned on the shower.
“Take off your pants.” She shucked off her own and kicked them tothe side, letting her panties go with them. Since Jacqueline made no move toundress further, Casey reached for the waistband of her jeans.
“Should we slow this down?” Jacqueline covered her hands,stilling them.
Casey fisted her hands in denim and met Jacqueline’s eyes. “Doyou want to?”
“I don’t think I’m in any condition to make that call right now.”
Casey was a grown woman—certainly too old to be losing controlover a woman, let alone one with whom she had a complicated history. Thepractical side of her—the one that knew better—was quickly being overtaken bythe part that craved Jacqueline’s touch.
Casey dragged her gaze deliberately over Jacqueline’s body. Herbreasts were fuller than the last time Casey had seen them, but still sofamiliar that, just looking at them, Casey could feel their weight in herhands, taste the texture of her nipples on her tongue. “Well, then we have aproblem, because we’re the only two people here. And I can’t look at you likethis and say no. But if you ask me to, I’ll try like hell.”
Jacqueline shoved her jeans down and pulled them off, hopping onone foot, then the other.
Casey laughed. “I haven’t seen you undress that fast since thedays when we had to try to squeeze one in before Sean got home from school.”
Jacqueline laughed with her. “Get in that shower before I rememberthat you’re the mother of a twenty-year-old.”
“Oh, did you just call me old?” Casey acted offended, but it feltgood to be with Jacqueline. She hadn’t imagined a moment like this between themin so many years, but she’d have thought she’d be freaked
