I nodded. “It’s not that, Penelope, it’s just that I don’t understand why the dreams only started when I turned sixteen. Why didn’t I remember any of this when I was younger?”
“Yes, I had thought about this earlier,” said Penelope, “but I didn’t voice my opinion. Maybe I should have.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well,” she began, “there is a certain sort of fae glamour that can repress memories until they are ready to be revealed. It is an ancient art, wielded only by the spirit-fae.”
I was still confused at what she was getting at. “Which means?”
“I have been thinking about this since you told us about the dream, and I was going to speak to you about it at one point, but I cannot be sure if I am right.”
“Right about what?”
“I have a theory,” said Penelope slowly. “And it is only a theory . . .”
“Which is?”
“That Elayna knew she could only save herself or her child,” she said and paused. “She chose you.”
I nodded weakly.
“But Elayna was clever, and extremely resourceful as well as powerful. If she knew Morgana was going to use the Dagger of Dragath on her, she must have known she wasn’t going to die, only be trapped within it.”
“But isn’t it the same thing if no one knows she’s there?”
“Not if the child she protected is a powerful fae-mage who can come back one day and save her.”
“You mean”—I paused, my eyes narrowing—“she expected me to find her?”
“Yes, I believe she did,” said Penelope. “I think she must have glamoured you into forgetting everything you saw and knew until you were ready. But that doesn’t mean you should get yourself killed in the bargain. You have to master your powers. Only then will you be able to take on Morgana and Lilith. Even then, the chances of us winning are slim. You must listen to your granduncle and go to Elfi. Your grandmother, Izadora, is queen of the fae, and Elayna is her daughter; she will definitely help you find your mother. I am sure about that. Go to her, see what she has to say, and then decide what you want to do. Elayna has been trapped for nearly fifteen years now. A few more months will not make a difference.”
But it made a difference to me, a big difference. Everything was so clear now. It all made sense. My mother knew she would be trapped, she knew I was a fae-mage, and she knew that if I ever found my way back to Avalonia, I would find her and save her. And that was exactly what I was going to do. I didn’t say anything to Penelope, though. I couldn’t trust her not to tell Uncle Gabriel what I was planning.
“Thank you, Penelope,” I said, getting up from the bench. “You have been a great help.”
“Glad I could help, my dear, and I hope you can understand why we all are doing this. It is only for your own safety.”
I nodded. “I know. Thank you.” I hurried off through a flowering garden path, back into the palace.
I went back to my room and started packing a few things in a leather satchel. I had to leave soon. I had to get out of here before Uncle Gabriel took me away to Elfi. I had no idea how I was even going to get out of the palace, let alone the city, but I had made up my mind. If I didn’t leave now, I would be forced to go to Elfi, and my chance of finding my mother would be gone. I knew Uncle Gabriel said he would help me find my mother, but only after I did as he wanted. If war came—and it was coming—the lands would be in turmoil. I might be stuck in Elfi for years, unable to cross the borders. I could not be sure if my grandmother would help me. My only chance was to go now.
“What are you doing?” said Kalen as he came in the door.
I whirled around and threw him a dark look. “Don’t you ever knock?” I was relieved it was only Kalen.
“The door was open.” Kalen looked apologetic.
“Well, shut it,” I said, quickly trying to find some suitable things to take with me. I had no idea what I was doing and what I needed, so I was rushing around the room like an aimless chicken.
“Are you planning to go somewhere without telling me?” Kalen asked, a hurt note to his voice, but I barely noticed.
“Kalen,” I said, putting a pair of warm woolen socks and a leather vest into my satchel, “if I tell you, you have to promise not to tell anyone, okay?”
“I promise.” Kalen’s eyes twinkled as he perched himself on the edge of the bed.
I wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to tell him, but I had to tell someone. I was so confused. So I told him everything about the Dagger of Dragath and my mother.
“Queen Elayna is alive?” Kalen’s eyes grew wide.
I nodded. “And trapped,” I added. “I have to get her back.”
“So you are running off in the dead of night into a kingdom you have no idea about, all alone.” He narrowed his eyes. “A masterful plan, that one, I must say, my lady.”
“You don’t have to be sarcastic. You sound like Uncle Gabriel.”
“Your granduncle has a point,” said Kalen seriously. “Even I can tell you that this is a hopeless quest, one in which you have absolutely no possibility of succeeding.”
“I could,” I said quickly, sounding more sure than I felt, “if I had some help.”
Kalen’s jaw dropped. “You want me to go with you?” He was quite obviously aghast that I had even mentioned it.
“Well, why not? You said yourself that I need help, and you
