Lana had given up after that.
Now, however, she wanted to get Dax's take on the matter. Given the man's rigid discipline she had a feeling the danger didn't bother him at all, but she was still curious.
“I was talking to the Captain earlier,” she said cautiously. “He told me he planned to die fighting the Deeks.”
The young man nodded. “He's made no secret of his intentions.”
“And how do you feel about it?”
He paused with a piece of processed meat halfway to his mouth, eyeing her thoughtfully. “I have no desire to die, but I accept that it's always possible in combat. Our odds are better than usual, given the general excellence of the ship and crew and how carefully we operate, but our enemies are the rulers of humanity. That's effectively an infinitely powerful enemy we have to contend with.”
Lana took another bite, chewing slowly. “And about why we're fighting?”
Dax didn't pause eating this time, although he straightened to the even more rigid posture that suggested he was distressed. “I agree with the Captain's assessment of our enemy's nature. The effectiveness of our current efforts are harder to quantify, but the Movement should be stopped if possible.”
Well, she supposed that was about the response she'd expected from the young man. But she wanted to dig deeper. “What if you had another choice besides fighting?”
“I don't.” The words were said simply, with no trace of resentment or even resignation. Dax shoved the final two tubes of meat into his mouth at once and got to work clearing his dining space. Lana took the cue and hastily finished eating herself, following his example in clearing her own part of the table.
She wasn't sure whether to be relieved or disappointed when, instead of leading her to the bridge and therefore Aiden, the young man instead led her back to the engine room. It seemed that with Belix off duty he wanted to take advantage of the opportunity to teach her more of that system.
But they'd only worked for about ten minutes when Dax abruptly tensed. Not much, but given his rigid self-control it didn't take much to be noticeable.
Confused, Lana turned to see that Belix had just walked through the door. The Ishivi gave her a warm smile, then turned an imperious look towards the young man. “The shield buffers are sluggish.”
“Acknowledged,” Dax said tonelessly, straightening. He turned to Lana. “Want to learn how to maintenance the shields?”
She really didn't, but if she was going to be a useful member of the crew she probably should. But before she could answer Belix cut in. “Actually, Lana, I was hoping that after I sent the life of the party away, you'd stick around and we could spend some more girl time together.”
Lana looked uncomfortably between the two. Great, now she had to choose. Or more accurately, pick between boring but comfortable productivity with Dax, or spending who knew how long listening to the elfin woman's endless chatter while learning only tidbits of actual useful information about the engines.
It made her feel bad to think it, but although she had nothing against Belix, even found she kind of liked the woman, she realized she preferred spending time with the weapons officer.
Dax showed no reaction to the elfin woman's challenge. “You're off duty, Lana. Your time is your own.” Without another word he turned on his heel and strode out of the room, noticeably veering to give Belix a wide berth and not even looking at her.
That left her with the elfin woman, her choice apparently made for her. At least until Belix appraised her with a frown crinkling her sharply beautiful features. “Huh. You're trying to think of a way to ditch me for the gunner, aren't you?”
That was a good opening to be tactfully honest. “I just want to learn to be a useful member of the crew,” Lana replied lamely.
The Ishivi rolled her eyes. “Ouch, picking the guy with zero charisma over me. Have fun then, I guess.”
“I can visit you later,” she offered, feeling guilty.
Lana had a feeling Belix was struggling not to snap out a snarky response, loneliness warring with pride. “Okay,” she finally said. “But don't feel like you have to. I don't need your pity.”
That made her feel even more guilty, and she hesitantly wrapped her arms around the elfin woman. “I want to.”
Belix stiffened for a moment, then sighed and hugged her back. “This is what I get for wanting to be friends with the popular girl.”
Lana blinked. Popular? Before she could think about that she was ushered out the door into the corridor, but rather than returning to the engine room Belix headed the other way, waving goodbye over her shoulder. “Guess I'm heading to bed with my toys after all!” she called.
Shrugging, Lana hurried the other way to catch up to Dax.
He seemed to have gone back into his shell, once again the stiffly professional crewman, and kept the conversation only to teaching her about the shield buffers and how to identify and then fix common problems with them. Lana felt a bit bad, like he'd been opening a door to her and abruptly shut it in her face.
When the conversation hit a lull, both of them focused on using compressed air to clear dust out of heat filters, she worked up the courage to speak up. “Can I ask you something?”
The young man glanced at her, expression neutral. “Depends on what it is, but go ahead.”
“Okay.” She hesitated, searching for the best way to ask this. “I've noticed you don't seem to get on well with Belix or the Captain.”
Actually, he didn't seem to get on well with Barix, either. And of course Fix just did what any of the crew told
