“Please don’t tell me you’re that wet behind the ears, darling? You know it’s possible to do it even before you’re married, don’t you?”
“I thought only the worst kind of women did that.” Evelyn repeated what her mother had always told her.
“Then perhaps I’m the worst kind of woman.” Lilian did not look at all concerned. “But I’m not the only one, I can tell you. Why, nearly every woman I know must be on a one-way journey to hell.”
Evelyn listened to Lilian and wondered just which man, or men, Lilian had done such things with. The waiter from the Yellow Orchid? Despite the disapproval she could not help, she was intrigued by what Lilian had said. The relations between a man and a woman could be something to enjoy. Something that did not depend on marriage. Apparently, it need not be as mysterious and frightening as it had always seemed. There was something of a relief in that, and it prompted her next question.
“I thought it was painful and just a wife’s duty. Isn’t it like that?”
“Oh no! Of course, I’m sure that’s how some poor women experience it. But if you know what you’re doing and so does your lover, well, then it’s just another thing altogether. There’s really nothing like it. Maybe I should lend you my book after all.”
“I’m not sure I want to read it,” Evelyn protested. Nevertheless, Lilian drew the book from the shelf and gave it to her. Evelyn took it dumbly.
“And I think you’ll enjoy this one.” Lilian handed The Rainbow to Evelyn.
“Thank you.” Evelyn returned to her armchair, before any more of Lilian’s books could create awkward conversations.
Lilian turned curious eyes on Evelyn again. “So there’s really no one waiting for you at home? No one you’re just dying to marry?”
Again, Evelyn thought of Michael. But he was not waiting for her and she certainly had no wish to marry him. She did not want to bring him into this new place, to give Lilian even more questions. “No, there’s no one. I should really be married by now, of course.”
“You’re younger than me, and I’m not married.”
“I’m different to you.” She did not really need to explain why she was so different to Lilian.
“Why are you? You’re a young woman, you’re attractive, you’re smart. What can I do that you can’t do?”
Evelyn considered. “It’s not about what I can or can’t do. It’s what I expect to happen in my life.”
“Did you expect to be in London today?”
“No,” Evelyn admitted.
“Then perhaps it’s not really about what you expect to happen. Life’s about what you want to happen, if you ask me.”
Evelyn thought Lilian’s approach was rather selfish and idealistic. But then Lilian seemed to have always been wealthy and popular, so it was not really a surprise that she did not approach life practically. And even Evelyn could admit the lure of going through life as Lilian did.
“I suppose I don’t really know what I want to happen,” she replied. “I don’t even know how long I’ll stay in London.”
“Well, how long did you tell your family you’d be away?” Lilian asked.
Evelyn hesitated. The pause was long enough to raise another question from Lilian. “You did tell them you were coming away to London, didn’t you, Evie?”
“Not exactly,” Evelyn confessed. There was no point trying to live a lie while she was staying with Lilian. “I left letters for them. They’ll know now.”
“So you’re a runaway.” Lilian seemed delighted by the news. “How awfully cloak-and-dagger.”
“Not really.” She explained her early morning departure. “Hopefully they’re not too worried.”
“My parents wouldn’t give a fig, but I expect yours are slightly different to that.” Lilian reflected for a moment.
“I think they’ll be very angry,” Evelyn said thoughtfully. There weren’t words to convey the level on which she suspected she had angered her parents.
“And they’ll miss you?”
“I suppose so.” She realised she’d barely considered the extent to which they cared about her. “I don’t know. I never really felt like they liked me very much, if you know what I mean. They spent all of their money on Eddie, sent him to school when they made me leave when I was fourteen, that sort of thing. And then my younger sister, Annie, she was the one who led the life she was expected to. She’s recently married and she’ll be a perfect wife and mother. I could never settle, you see.” It felt good to explain what she had always kept to herself, even if it was to someone like Lilian.
“And when Eddie offered you the chance to come to London, you took it, no matter the consequences.” Lilian spoke softly, gently inquisitive now.
“Yes. I mean, I also wanted to make sure you got Frank’s letter. That seemed ever so important too. But there were other ways of getting it to you without coming here on my own. I just wanted to see London so badly.”
“And there’s nothing at all wrong with that, Evie. I, for one, am very glad you did. And thank heavens it was my doorstep you landed on. It could have been anyone. Imagine if I was a stuffy old schoolteacher or something. Then you’d see a whole different side of London.”
“Honestly, I didn’t know what to expect. I knew London was big and exciting but I didn’t really know much about life here. I still don’t.”
“Of course. And even a school ma’am could probably show you some thrilling museums and formal gardens. But if you really want to live, you came to the right place.”
“I can see that.” Evelyn smiled. “And I do want to thank you for taking me in. You needn’t have done. And for being prepared to show me so much.”
“Darling, so far you’ve only seen the Yellow Orchid. Now, it’s a smashing place, no doubt, but there is more to London, even I can admit that.”
“I’m looking forward to seeing much more. And to meeting more of your friends.”
“I think we’ll have to see about
