She placed her hand on his cheek, his rough stubble scratching her skin. “It’s not your fault. You brought TJ friendship and happiness. He’d never want you to beat yourself up over this. You spent your life carrying guilt and responsibility that wasn’t yours. Don’t take this too. This isn’t yours to bear. This is on Parsons.”
He jerked, shaking his head violently.
She grabbed his face in both her hands, forcing his eyes to meet hers. “Don’t do this. Don’t run from me. Choose me.”
“I’m no good for you. I come from the devil himself. Everything I touch gets destroyed. I’m not enough.” His words said one thing, and his eyes another. “But I want to be, Belle. I want to be so bad it hurts.”
“You’re nothing but good, Bently Evans. You’ve been surrounded by darkness your whole life and still you shine so much brighter than you realize. You’re not the devil—you’re the moon. You’re my guiding light.”
He blinked as a single tear fell down each side of his face.
“Give me your hurt. Give me your guilt. Cast it all on me. I can take it. We can be strong together, leaning on one another. Let me love you.” She pressed her lips to his, halting his reply.
He hesitated only a moment before his hands pulled her tighter against him. She tore at his shirt, letting her towel fall to the ground. He pulled down his pants, leaving them in a pile on the floor. His body slammed onto hers. Their touches were frantic and needy. They were kindred spirits, stuck in a storm of grief, tumbling and plunging through the darkness they’d been born into. But together, they burned bright and hot. United, they lit up like a thousand suns.
His hands gripped and roamed, burning, searing her skin. Need enveloped her, washing away everything with its cleansing fire. Lips caressed hers, taking and giving all at once. Kissing him made it hurt a little less. She raked her fingernails over his back, pulling him closer, greedy and desperate. Electricity flashed and splintered through her as he thrust into her in one quick surge.
“Yes!” she cried out. Discord and chaos spun within. A wildfire of rapture shattered her. Pressure built until it crested. He rocked her hard and fast. His sinewy muscles were taut, curling and bunching over her as he pounded deep inside her. His blue eyes locked on her, as their bodies danced. She quaked. She cried out with whimpers and wanton words as he drove her towards the light. Warmth flooded her body as every nerve ending tingled with awareness just before another orgasm blasted through her. He’d taken her pain and replaced it with euphoria. He’d taken her darkness and given her glimmering, sparkling, blinding light.
“I love you,” he said, over and over. He grunted, sweat beading on his forehead. His eyes locked on to hers as he charged his own release.
Bently pressed his cheek to hers. Their tears melded together as one. Her pulse raced. Breaths came in gasps. And a small piece of her heart fluttered back to life.
***
Bently held her hand. She was tucked against the side of his body, warding out some of the chill as they stood on a ledge overlooking the gray-green ocean as waves pounded against the black cliffs. The March wind whipped and whistled through the evergreens. She shivered and tucked her chin against Bently’s chest. He swept his lips across hers before she lifted her head to the sunshine. Warm rays caressed her face. TJ.
Today was the day she’d say goodbye. She looked around at the small group of familiar faces. Bently’s friends and family. Katy was there. TJ’s friend Mark and the girl he’d liked, Cam. Everyone who cared about her brother.
They’d all taken turns saying something about him, and now it was her turn. “My brother was the best human on this earth. He was kind, and smart. He was the bravest person I know. He wanted to devote his life to helping people. He was going to become a doctor to save lives . . . but he saved mine when I was seven years old and he was born. He’d rescued me every day since. He’ll always be with me. I’ll carry him in my heart. And I’ll honor his life by not wasting mine.”
She opened up the jar of ashes, spilling the contents as the waves crashed against the rocks below. The wind blew, carrying his remains out to sea where he’d be forever immortalized in nature.
Her knees buckled and her chest squeezed as she let the last of him go. Bently’s arm steadied her. She looked up at him, offering him a watery smile. They’d been through so much together in the eight months of knowing each other. Highs and lows. Mountains and valleys. He’d taken her to the tallest of heights, and held her hand as they navigated the lowest pits of grief and despair. Some days she needed to lean on him, and others he borrowed her strength. Together, they’d get through this. Together, they would build a future that was brighter and better. Together, they were unstoppable.
Chapter 49
Eighteen Months Later
Bently
Bently replayed the body cam footage over and over in his head as the wooden bench bit into his back in the packed courtroom. Parsons had peeked in the window, seeing TJ moving around in the kitchen. He’d assumed it was a break-in and decided that was probable cause. He’d opened the front door, announcing his presence. TJ’s back had been to him, bobbing his head up and down, obviously lost to the music flowing through his earbuds. Five seconds. That was all it had taken for Parsons to open the
