“Of course, she was a regular and this was her beat.” Mac smiled fondly. “She was one of the best, you know?”
She felt that familiar pang in her heart. “I know.”
“She was too young when …” Mac paused. “Well, she used to come around here when she was single, then less so after she married Sofia’s dad. But, when she did come, all she talked about was her daughter. She was so proud of you.” His eyes shone with pride. “She came here to tell me about that day you said you wanted to be a cop like her.”
“She did?” That she didn’t know.
“Yeah, she was so happy.”
She swallowed the lump in her throat. “I didn’t know. Thank you.”
“She’s a great detective,” Lucas answered. “And devoted to her job.” He winked at her, then raised his glass. “To your mom.”
“To mom.” She clinked her mug against him then took a sip, allowing the cold liquid to wash away the emotion building in her throat.
Lucas flashed her a sympathetic smile, then turned to Mac. “Say, Mac, I bet you have some great stories about when you were a rookie.”
“Do I?” Mac wiped his hands on the towel wrapped around his waist. “There was this one time …”
Sofia sighed inwardly with relief, glad to have the attention off her. She loved talking about her mom, but it was these moments that she wished Nadia was still alive. She never had a lot of girlfriends; she didn’t have any friends, period, but it would be nice to talk to a female about certain things. Like how she was feeling about Lucas and the fact that she was nervous about what she knew was inevitable. Because she knew if she had sex with Lucas tonight, well, it wouldn’t just be about sex. There was a dam inside her, waiting to burst. With passion. With emotion. And possibly something deeper.
Plus, there was the fact that her last sexual encounter wasn’t exactly ideal. Sure, Derek was good in bed, but then all the mess that came after … It was silly because he and Lucas were nothing alike, but still, there was a part of her that was afraid of what would happen after.
As Mac continued to regale them with tales of his youth, Sofia felt her cellphone buzz in her purse. It was a message from an informant on another case. Though she hated to be rude, this was important and she excused herself so she could call the number back, crossing the main bar room to make her way outside. Stepping a few feet away from the front door, she dialed the number back and spoke to the person who picked up the phone, and scheduling another time they could speak longer.
Being a weekday, the bar wasn’t full, and there were only two tables occupied in the entire place. However, when she finished her call and walked in, she noticed a big group that must have just arrived. They were all dressed in street clothes, but her instinct told her they were all cops. It looked like they had been celebrating, as they were all loud and raucous. Ignoring them, she focused her sights back on the bar where Lucas and Mac were waiting.
“Well, look what the cat dragged out.”
She froze at the familiar voice. Fuck me.
“Yeah, didn’t think she’d show her face at a place like this.”
Fleetwood and Benito. What the hell were they doing here? She specifically chose this place because it was far from her precinct.
Sofia knew she had two choices. Ignore them as she had always done or … not. She chose the latter. “Detective,” she nodded at Fleetwood, then turned to Benito. “Sergeant.”
“When we chose this place for Barret’s retirement party, I was told this was a cop bar,” Fleetwood sneered.
“Yeah, seems like they just let anyone in here,” Benito spat. Behind the two, the rest of their party had gone quiet.
She felt her temper rise. “Why not say what you really mean to my face instead of doing this pathetic mean-girls act.” Her words stunned them and both men went quiet. “What? Don’t have the balls, cowards?”
Fleetwood went red. “You’re a rat, Selinofoto, is that what you wanted to hear? That you sold out one of our own—”
“Who was dirty! Derek was doing Bianchi’s bidding and you all know it.” She didn’t even realize she was shaking with anger. This was it. After months of keeping quiet, it was all going to come back now. “You don’t even know half of what he did. What Bianchi told him to do and how he enjoyed doing it. That—”
“What’s going on here? Sofia?”
The voice was soft, but she could hear the deadliness just underneath the surface. Turning her head, she saw Lucas standing behind her, his blue-green mismatched eyes looking straight at Fleetwood. The cold, hard expression in them made her shiver.
“What’s the matter?” Mac said, his voice booming as he approached them. “Are you guys making trouble?” He folded his arms over his wide chest.
“Not at all,” Benito swallowed. “Just … saying hi to a friend.” He pulled on Fleetwood’s arm. “C’mon, let’s go back to our table.”
Fleetwood huffed. “Fine. Let’s finish our drinks and go.” His eyes flickered at Sofia, before allowing Benito to drag him back.
Sofia counted to ten, then turned on her heel. She thought she heard Lucas and Mac call after her, but she didn’t want to stop. She would not cry in there, not show them how affected she was by their words. Pushing the door open, she stepped out into the cold night.
I wanted to do the right thing, Mom. Her throat burned as she choked on the tears she refused to spill. I did it for you. But what was the right thing? Was handing over a dirty cop the right thing? Or keeping with the blue wall of silence? Frankly, she didn’t know anymore.
“Sofia!”
Lucas.
“What’s going on, Sofia?” He stepped in front of her and placed his hands on her
