“Nothing,” she said through gritted teeth.
“That’s not nothing.” His hands gripped her tighter. “Tell me.”
“I … I …” She looked up into his eyes, wanting to get lost. To forget. “I want to go, Lucas.”
He let out a sigh. “All right. I’ll take you back to your apartment.”
“No.” She took a step forward and placed her hands on his chest. His muscles jumped under her touch, and she moved her hands up to his shoulders. “I don’t want to go home. Take me back to your place.” His eyes darkened and he nodded, then took his phone out from his pocket to call, she assumed, Reyes. She gripped the soft wool of his jacket, flexing her fingers. She just wanted to forget about what happened. Forget about Derek. Forget about Bianchi. Just for one night.
She wasn’t sure what to expect when they arrived at his place. The ride uptown was silent, the tension growing between them. She hoped it was just the sexual tension and not anything else. Lucas never said a word the entire time, and he sat away from her, his face turned to the window. What was he thinking right now? She was desperate to know because she knew there was something going on. Isn’t this what he wanted?
The car slowed to a stop, and her heart began to pound in her chest. He slipped out of the vehicle and held the door open for her. This was it. When she stepped out and followed him inside, there was no going back. She slid across the luxurious leather seat, then stepped out of the car. Lucas placed his hand on the small of her back, guiding her up the steps. When he opened the door, she stepped inside, holding her breath as she heard the door lock behind them.
“Lucas.” She spun around, then pressed herself up to him. Getting on her tiptoes, she pressed her mouth to his. His lips were warm and she let out a soft sigh when his hands encircled her waist. “Lucas, please.”
He moved his lips lower, down her neck, tickling her with his lips. “Sofia.”
“Take me to bed.” Or the couch. Or the floor. Or against the wall. She didn’t care. She just wanted to lose herself in him.
“I will.” He lifted her up into his arms and carried her away. To her surprise, they went past the stairs and into another room down the hallway.
It was dark inside, but when her vision adjusted, she could tell it was some kind of office. Leather-bound books lined one wall and there was a fireplace on the opposite side. Lucas sat her down on a comfortable settee, then promptly stood up.
As she took off her coat, she watched him walk away from her, toward the fireplace. He flicked a switch, and it turned on, the flames leapt up, bathing the room in a soft light. Unbuttoning his coat, he folded it neatly and placed it to the side, then loosened and removed his tie. She waited for him to come back, but he remained in the same spot, his back to her. “Lucas? Why are you all the way over there?”
He turned, slowly. “Because I can’t keep my hands away from you.”
“All the more reason to come back here.” She tried to sound light-hearted, but the expression on his face remained stony. “Lucas?”
“Who’s Bianchi?” he asked, his voice flat. “And who’s Derek?”
The last name he said made her stomach twist into knots, and she shot up like a rocket. “It’s getting late, I should get going.”
Before she could even take a step toward the door, he was right in front of her. How did he move so fast? Maybe it was the wine and beer making her see things. “Get out of my way, Lucas.” He wrapped his fingers around her wrists. “Let go.”
“No, not until you tell me who they are. I’ve seen their names before. In your notes.”
“That was confidential!” Anger bubbled inside her. “You want to know? You want to know how I ruined my career? How I slept with a man who broke my trust and turned out to be a monster? And when I tried to do the right thing, everyone hated me for it?”
She gritted her teeth and tried to turn away, but he tipped her chin up. She expected disdain or even disgust from him. Not the quiet and gentle look of understanding.
“I’m sorry for bringing this up.” His voice was steady, but strong. “But we’re not going to jump into bed so you can forget your problems.”
That cut into her deep, because it was the truth. She would have used him tonight, because she just wanted to feel something else aside from the hurt gutting her deep. It wasn’t fair, and he didn’t deserve that. “I’m sorry.” God, she was a terrible person.
“Tell me.” He brought her hands up to his lips and kissed them.
She took a deep breath and looked up to him. The light from the fireplace turned his eyes all molten. There was something in them she couldn’t quite name. Or didn’t want to. So she turned away and sank back into the settee. He joined her, never letting go of her hands. “Derek Hastings was my partner. We’d been paired up for a couple of months after my old partner retired. This job, it can get lonely you know, and we just … turned to each other.”
She felt him tense, but continued. “It was just scratching an itch, trying to feel something after you’ve numbed yourself because all you can see is the worst in the world. But it turns out …” She took a deep breath. “I heard him talking on the phone one night. He thought I was in the bathroom. He was talking in a low voice, but I heard some words that sounded familiar. From a case we were working on. I followed my instincts and dug
