She blinked a few times and looked at him, seeing the truth. His golden eyes weren’t scowling at her in anger or disgust. He looked upon her with concern and worry.
His hands on her shoulders didn’t grip her too tightly but steadied her. Offering his support and his strength.
“Please, lass,” he begged her.
She tried to slow her breathing by telling herself she was not in danger from this man, but it was too late. Her heart ran away all on its own. She pressed a palm to her chest, bidding it to stay there.
Before she could manage to speak, Cameron had scooped her up and carried her into the shade of a nearby tree. He pulled a flask from his side and held it to her lips. “Drink,” he ordered. But the short command lacked anger or danger.
She took a sip and coughed at the burn of the whisky as it tore at her throat. Another sip, and then another. The warmth in her stomach spread out through her body to the very tips of her toes and fingers.
She managed to take in a deep breath and let it out slowly. Then another. Soon her heart slowed, and she sagged against him, exhausted from her ordeal.
“Do ye feel better?” he asked, his voice vibrating at her ear.
“I’m tired,” she answered, not sounding like herself.
“Then rest. I’ll watch over you,” he promised.
She closed her eyes and drifted away, enjoying the comfort of his embrace.
…
Cam frowned down at his sleeping wife. She’d been curled up on his lap for most of the morning. He’d noticed the dark shadows under her eyes when he’d met her in the kitchen, and guessed she hadn’t slept well the night before.
But that wasn’t an explanation for what had happened here, when she’d gone pale and limp. When she’d been unable to speak for breathing too hard and her heart had nearly beaten out of her chest.
She’d worn herself out battling…nothing.
Nothing but fear.
“What had you so terrified?” he asked her sleeping form as he brushed her golden hair back from her face. Eventually she shifted, and her eyes fluttered open. She gazed up at him for a moment, then looked around as if confused as to where she was or how she got there.
“How do ye feel?” he asked, moving his stiff leg and flexing his numb fingers.
“I’m sorry,” she said, her cheeks turning pink.
She had the loveliest blush. In another time he might say things that kept her blushing, just to see it. But a darkness lurked in her eyes, and he needed to focus on how to help her overcome it.
She kept her gaze away from his until he could stand it no longer. Moving slowly, he placed his fingers slightly on her chin and turned her face toward his so she had to look him in the eyes.
“What happened?”
She swallowed and would have looked away again if he hadn’t kept a firm grasp on her.
“I’m fine.” The lie came out in a soft voice.
“Are you with child?” he asked. He’d been thinking of how he might get the answer from her the whole time she’d been sleeping. He wasn’t one for mincing words. Direct was best.
She blinked, and her mouth fell open in surprise.
“It’s fine if you are. I’d understand. You were married directly prior to our…wedding.” He swallowed and laid out his feelings so she wouldn’t be afraid. “I’ll be a father to your child, Mari. I’ll raise and protect the babe as if it were my own blood. Give them my name.”
“Why do you think I’m with child?”
“I’ve seen Kenna have dizzy spells when she was pregnant in the past. Though I never saw her lose her breath like you did. Mostly she just turns green and runs for the nearest door.”
“I’m not.” She shook her head. “I’m not with child. I was… I was afraid.”
“Of what?” He looked around, genuinely puzzled. Then it dawned on him.
She glanced away, and he allowed her escape, fearing he didn’t want to hear her answer.
“I thought perhaps you were angry with me and had brought me out here to punish me. You’re so large, and a warrior. I don’t think I’d survive it.”
It took a few seconds for him to put her words together into some form of sense. Even then he was in shock at the absurdity.
“You think…” He paused to clear the anger from his voice. It wouldn’t do to be mad at her while explaining how wrong she was about his being angry. “You think I would bring you out here and beat you?”
She bit her lip and shook her head.
Maybe he had misunderstood after all. He hoped so.
“You don’t understand,” she finally said.
“Please explain it to me so I can understand.”
“I thought maybe you were upset. You looked upset when you came for me in the kitchens.”
He huffed out a breath and shook his head. “I dinna like seeing you working in the kitchens. You’d been a duchess before, and my station doesn’t allow you many luxuries. I was upset with myself for not being able to give you a life fit for someone like you. I wasn’t angry with you, I swear it.”
She blinked at him. “I think I might have known that in my heart, but then my mind took the small thread of fear and added on to it, piecing together memories and other fears until it got so out of control I could no longer breathe. It’s happened before. I can’t seem to stop it when it starts. Even though I see now how unrealistic my thoughts were, at the time they seemed utterly possible and imminent.”
He brushed her hair back and pulled her against him, thinking over what she’d shared. What terrible hell did she live in? And how could he help her out of it? Her demons weren’t ones he could slay with his sword.
“Do you trust that I’m a man of my word, Mari?” he
