At some point Ridley would return, and she would need to escape. She knew Cameron would protect her. He’d most likely send Ridley on a wild goose chase to buy her time to get farther away. But she had no doubts when she left her new home, she would be leaving alone.
“I told you I didn’t want you to care about me,” he said harshly. “What will happen when I’m called off to battle? Will you be standing by my horse wailing for me not to leave you? And if I don’t return? What then? I warned ye it wasn’t safe. I told you—” He winced in anger and let his head fall. “This isn’t what I wanted. I was verra clear.”
“If you think I will not worry about you when you’re in battle, that’s ridiculous. You are my husband. We may not be bound by emotions, but I do not wish anything to happen to you. You’re a good man. I would hate to see any good man taken in battle.”
He let out a sigh. “We should be apart for a while. Let things settle a bit between us.”
“Whatever you think is best.” She nodded and stared at the ground. He was right to worry. She’d begun to crave his kisses. Hadn’t she even hoped to see him naked as she’d come to the loch? A little distance would do them good.
“I’m going scouting. I’ll be away for a few days. We’ll talk when I return.”
She nodded again and left before she did something foolish.
Like ask him to stay…
Chapter Nineteen
Once in the protection of the dense forest, Mari let her tears flow and her quiet sobs echo through the trees as she ran through the brush. She’d been a fool to come looking for Cameron. She’d acted like a moon-eyed bride who missed her husband.
And she only realized now that she truly had missed him. He was kind and funny, and always ready to share a good story. Normally he made her feel safe and protected…but tonight had been different. And yet, under the circumstances it was silly to be upset that he wouldn’t even consider the notion of feeling something for her. Did she want him to mourn when she was forced to leave?
He’d told her many times he’d never wanted to marry. Why would she ever think she could change his mind?
Why would she even want to?
The more distance between them, the better. She would already be heartsick to leave Kenna and the boys. Even Lachlan had grown on her. It was better that she didn’t form any attachment to Cameron, nor him to her, in order to spare them both pain when she needed to leave. Which she would, for there was no doubt Ridley would come for her eventually.
Night had fallen soft and warm around her, as if trying to comfort her. But she wouldn’t be comforted. She continued to scold herself for coming to the loch.
When she finally realized she should have reached the clearing leading up to the castle by now, she stopped to look around. The trees cast dark, eerie shadows, and the wind rustled the leaves, mimicking the sound of footsteps.
Her heart pounded in her ears, and she did her best to slow her breathing.
She was safe. She was on MacKinlay lands. She was somewhere between the loch and the castle. She couldn’t be far lost. She could call out for Cameron, but then he would see her tears and he might think they were out of worry over him instead of frustration with herself.
Turning in the direction she’d come from in the hope of finding where she’d gone wrong, it yielded no clear direction. The trees were too tall for her even to see the moon for guidance.
Deciding to head in one direction, she started off, the brush stinging her cheeks as she rushed by in a hurry to get home.
When she heard voices, she let out a breath of relief and headed toward the sound. A light above directed her, and she was actually smiling with the joy of freedom when she stepped through the last ring of bushes into a small clearing filled with light.
She blinked at the sight before her. Five large men sitting around a fire stared back at her. One by one she studied them, looking for some sign of recognition. She’d only been to the village a few times, but she didn’t know these men.
The one closest to her smiled in an unnerving way.
“Look, lads, my prayers have been answered. A lovely lass for my own. No more sharing for me.”
The other men grumbled.
A whimper caused her to turn her head. She saw a woman—a girl, really—dirty and bedraggled, tied to a tree with a cloth in her mouth.
Lord in heaven.
The man’s words clicked into place, and fear swarmed around her to the point she could taste it. She thought she might faint, but if she did, she would be at their mercy. She drew in a deep breath, reaching for calm and control despite the terror that caused her to shake.
“Stand down,” she said when the man rose. Her voice sounded surprisingly firm. “I’m the wife of the war chief of Clan MacKinlay. Touch me and he’ll kill you all.”
“Och, an English lass, we have.” The man laughed, clearly not taking her warning seriously.
There was no time to reason with them as another man stepped out behind her, cutting off escape. She screamed with all her might, but a second later the man clasped his meaty hand over her mouth.
…
When throwing small stones into the loch did nothing to temper his mood, Cam changed over to hauling large rocks to the edge and tossing them in. The large splash and gulp as the boulder was pulled to the bottom was only somewhat satisfying.
He’d made a mess of things with Mari. He’d accused her of breaking their arrangement,
