Notice the qualities of your Yes! and amplify those qualities to make this Yes! even more positive.
Anchor your Yes! with a different physical gesture. Feel the Yes! in your body. Hear your voice saying “Yes!”
4. Say “Yes!” to the enhancing belief.
And feeling that “Yes!” even more fully, utter it repeatedly to that empowering belief that you want. For example, “I speak calmly and fluently.”
Do you want this? “Yes!” Really?
How many more times do you need to say “Yes!” right now, in order to feel that you have fully welcomed it into your presence?
5. YES the “Yes!” repeatedly and put into the future.
This is only an exercise. Do you want to keep this!
You really want this?
Would this improve your life?
Would it be valuable to you?
Figure 6.5: “No” to “Yes”The Drop Down Through pattern
From the many ways of creating change, those patterns which I have found work well with PWS are the ones included in this book. Although they address the specific issue of blocking and stuttering, they can easily be adapted for wide general usage. With so many to choose from, how do you decide which to use? Which is going to work most efficiently for the particular person you are with right now? That is a difficult question to answer because it depends on that person in front of you: how does change happen for them; how motivated are they to change? Do they really want to change; are they ready to let go of the benefits their old behavior provided? Your choice also depends on how well you understand their model of the world, because that affects your way of intervening in it.
However, if I were to suggest one pattern that works extremely effectively with people who block, it would be the Drop Down Through pattern. Indeed, in all the time I have been using it – over eight years – I have had more success with it than with any other single pattern. I am indebted to Tad James (James, 1987–1994) for introducing me to this pattern. This pattern can be used with any cognitive/emotional problem in which the person experiences a negative feeling. Over the years, I have made some modifications to the original (I have added step 5), but it remains simple in structure.
Essentially the person re-experiences their limiting emotional state and then mentally drops down through a number of layers which lie beneath it. With emotions, the metaphor of going down through layers works best. As they encounter each new layer, the person brings to conscious awareness the previously unconscious frames of mind that were supporting the layers above. The Drop Down Through Pattern provides a quick way to uncover the systemic nature of the problem, and the PWS will find it easy to apply the appropriate resources for resolving the issue and healing themselves.
CASE STUDY 10
Before I explain the pattern in detail, here is a transcript of a dialogue I had with a client. At a very early age Joe had witnessed the divorce of his parents. Joe began stuttering as a small child before his parents divorced. One parent later remarried, but the step-parent was extremely jealous of Joe and indeed seemed to work hard at showing favoritism towards his own children, and would shame Joe at every opportunity. This went on for years. During these critical years, Joe’s blocking grew worse and worse. He had wrapped his shame-based personality around his blocking. My dialogue with Joe went like this:
“Joe, so you felt a lot of shame from the way your step-dad treated you?”
“Yes.”
“Where do you feel this shame in your body?”
“It is in my chest.”
“Now, Joe, I want you to just imagine yourself dropping down through that shame in your chest. And as you drop down through that, what thought or feeling is underneath that?”
“Anger. There is one mad little boy there.”
“That is great. Now, Joe, I want you to just imagine yourself dropping down through that anger. And as you drop down through that, what thought or feeling is underneath that anger?”
“More anger.”
“That is great. Now, Joe, I want you to just imagine yourself dropping down through that more anger. And as you drop down through that, what thought or feeling is underneath that?”
“Sadness.”
“Now I want you to just imagine yourself dropping down through that sadness. And as you drop down through that, what thought or feeling is underneath the sadness?”
“Never a free kid.”
“Good Joe. Now just continue dropping down through that never being a free kid and what is underneath that?”
“Nervous. Timid. I was always nervous and timid as a kid.”
“And underneath being a nervous and timid kid, what is underneath that?”
“Scared. He scared the shit out of me!”
“You are doing really well, Joe. Just drop down through that and what thought or feeling is underneath that thought of your step-dad scaring the shit out of you?”
“Sadness.”
“And continuing on down, what thought or feeling is underneath the sadness?”
“Agitation.”
“Good Joe. And what is underneath agitation?”
Joe pauses.
“Nothing. There is nothing else there.”
“That is great Joe. Now just imagine yourself opening up that nothingness and imagine yourself dropping down through that and what is out the other side of that nothingness?”
“I don’t care. There is the thought that I don’t care about all that stuff.”
“Wow! Joe. That is fantastic. Now, just drop down through the ‘I don’t care’ and what thought or feeling is underneath ‘I don’t care’?”
“Strength. I feel strength.”
“Great. And what is underneath strength?
“There is that part of me that I
