I know he was the one who found her the last time she OD’d. I’ll never forget the words in that file, but those pale in comparison to how much of a kick in the gut it was to see the pictures he’s drawn since. His stick figure mom laying on a filth-ridden floor, a needle stabbed into her arm. The poor kid has seen more filth in his six years on earth than most people ever will, and my heart aches for him.
“We’re having a party here for him and another of the boys whose birthdays are next week. I know they’d love for you to be there.” As tempting as it is to say no, to keep hiding from Rylee and the complications that have suddenly appeared in my life, I accept the invitation.
By the time I’m driving home later that evening, I’m exhausted. All I can think about is getting into a nice hot bath and eating my own body weight in Chinese food.
I’m just getting out of my car when my phone vibrates in my purse. Juggling the stack of files I brought home to work on, I manage to answer the call and open my front door at the same time.
“You move to my city, and I don’t even get a call to tell me you’re here?” The deep voice of my cousin, Chase, sounds down the line.
“Hi to you too,” I say with a wide smile. It’s been too long since I’ve seen any of my relatives. We’ve always been a huge blended family, spending weekends, holidays, and vacations together. My mom, her best friends, and their families are all aunts, uncles, and cousins, even when there’s no blood ties between some of us.
Chase plays football for the L.A. Sharks, signing for them right after finishing college almost two years ago. Him being so close is one of the only reasons my mom didn’t lose her mind more than she did when I told her I accepted the job out here.
“I’m only in town for two days, so I’m taking you to dinner tonight,” he announces, and as much as I was looking forward to spending the evening with my bed, seeing a familiar face is even more appealing right now. That and the thought of a glass of crisp, cold white wine too.
***
The bar Chase drags me to is packed full of people, and there’s not a vacant table in sight. We’ve already been to dinner, and although I should probably head home, I’m not ready to be on my own again yet. Being around family is keeping my mind from wandering back to thoughts of Tucker.
Spotting a group of guys around a pool table at the back of the room, Chase guides us to a vacant stool at a high-top table nearby. After a round of introductions, I begin to relax a little. It’s strange seeing my cousin and his friends being the center of attention the way they are, but it’s also kind of cool. Chase told me this place is a local hangout for the team, so the staff know to keep an area clear for them so they don’t get too many fan interruptions. It’s kinda crazy to see the dorky little cousin who used to follow Bailey and me around all grown up and demanding this much attention.
I’m on my second, and last, glass of wine when one of Chase’s teammates, Rafferty, tells me another joke that has me about to pee my pants with laughter. He’s taken it upon himself to keep me occupied since Chase got distracted by a pretty brunette waitress a little while ago. His hysterical game of peoplewatching has me laughing so hard my sides hurt. He’s a huge guy, not to mention absolutely gorgeous; all of Chase’s friends are. A fact that hasn’t gone unnoticed by the large group of women that have gathered near our tables.
When I finally get my laughter under control, I excuse myself to the bathroom. I’m weaving my way through the now thinned-out crowd when I collide with what feels like a brick wall. The crisp freshwater scent that I’d recognize anywhere is an attack on my senses. Strong hands grip my arms with a little too much force. I don’t need to look up to know who it is, but I do anyway.
Tucker’s steel-gray eyes sear into mine as he stares down at me.
“What are you doing here?” He doesn’t wait for me to find the words to answer before he keeps speaking. “I don’t see you for years, and suddenly it feels like you’re everywhere I turn,” he grinds out, jaw flexing as he tries to contain the animosity that radiates from him. “Leave me the hell alone, Brooke.”
“Tuck, I didn’t—”
“I’m not Tuck to you anymore,” he spits out, leaning down to get right in my face. I’m hit with the strong smell of alcohol. He’s drunk. No, he’s wasted. “I’m not anything to you anymore.” His hold on me tightens to the point of pain, and I do a poor job at hiding it. Even though he’s drunk, Tucker doesn’t miss the wince that twists across my face. He looks from my face to his where he still holds me, I see the realization as it hits him. He lets go of me so fast that I stumble back, wobbling on my heels.
Who is this man? This isn’t the Tucker I knew. He never would have acted like this. It's a stark reminder that the boy I once knew is long gone.
“I shouldn’t have…” He stumbles over his words. He stares down at his hands, seemingly confused over what just happened. A loud cheer goes up around the bar, jolting Tucker out of the trance he’s trapped in. His bleak gray eyes find mine, and what I see there has my heart clenching.
Pain. Confusion. Misery.
It's a look I used to see in his eyes occasionally. When things
