I stroked my thumb down her cheek and leaned in for a soft kiss. “You weren’t curled up in a ball sobbing in my basement that night.”
“I was on the inside,” she said, finally laughing a little bit. “You were good at distracting me from the fear. I guess when I’m alone, the thoughts that no one will know I was down there, or that I was hurt, just take over my mind. It’s stupid when it’s just a little summer storm, I get that, but I can’t change it, either.”
“It’s not stupid. I don’t know if anyone has told you this before, but I feel like I should. What you experience during storms is normal after the experience you lived through. It’s normal, Amber. Has anyone ever said you’re completely normal to be out of your mind afraid of something that once tried to kill you?”
She swung her head back and forth. “Never. I was told I needed to be stronger against the emotions taking over my mind. They gave me biofeedback techniques and ways to focus on other things, but that’s hard to do when you’re too scared to remember any of it. I need to be stronger, but I’m not. I’m too weak right now.”
I took her shoulders and turned her to look at me. “You’re wrong. You don’t need to be stronger. Good God, what you’ve lived with and dealt with since the injury proves your strength. Fair warning, if I ever hear anyone tell you to be stronger, I will bitch slap them.”
Her laughter filled the room, and she laughed for a good long time. “I’ll remember that because I’d like to see it.”
I caressed her cheek tenderly and smiled. “I would, but the point is, I know you feel weak right now. You’re not. You’re stronger than I am. You’re beautiful to boot, and this weekend, you’re mine.”
“I don’t want to go anywhere, Bishop. My leg isn’t good. It’s hard to travel, and the crutches make beaches nearly impossible to navigate.”
I placed my finger on her lips. “I know. I have this all worked out. Do you trust me?” Her head nodded against my finger again. “Good. I’m going to get your crutches so you can clean up while I finish the plans I have, okay? Trust me? I’ve got you.”
Her head nodded, and I grabbed her crutches from the floor of the foyer and carried them to her.
“Thanks,” she said, propping them under her arms. “What should I put on?”
“Remember that sundress you wore the first night we were supposed to go to The Modern Goat?” She nodded, and I winked before I headed to my room for a change of clothes.
Twelve
“You were right, this is the way to do a honeymoon,” I said, floating on the water with the sun beating down on me. My brace and crutches lay forgotten on the dock, and I was enjoying the freedom to just relax without being uncomfortable. Last night we had finally made it to The Modern Goat for dinner. We shared their surf and turf and talked about everything from our childhoods to our college days. I had never been more comfortable with another person in my life.
Bishop laughed from where he was sitting in an innertube and trailing his hands through the water. He wore nothing but a pair of swim trunks, and I couldn’t take my eyes off his chiseled chest and glistening skin. “I’m glad you’re enjoying our staycation.”
“So much,” I agreed. “Also, I’d just like to point out that you might be a dad, but you most certainly do not have a dad bod. I’m a little jealous of that innertube right now.”
His laughter filled the air again, and he bowed at the waist without falling out of the tube. “I’ll take that as a compliment. I believe that it’s hard to teach kids to be physically fit if you aren’t setting the same example.”
“That’s true,” I agreed, “but there’s physically fit, and then there’s—” I motioned around his body, “you.”
“Good genes. That’s all—a little time in the weight room and some high-quality protein. I’m not constantly working out or anything. It’s just how I’m built.”
I glanced down at myself in the blow-up chair I was floating on. “And this is just how I’m built. No curves. No boobs. Scars everywhere.”
He paddled the innertube closer to me and grasped my right ankle. “You have curves. They’re just less pronounced than other women. I’m not a sucker for big boobs. I’m a sucker for the ones that fit in my palms and my mouth perfectly. The scars are just skin in a different configuration than the skin around it. Those scars tell the story of how strong you had to be. They aren’t everywhere, either.”
There he was using that word strong again. He managed to work it into almost every conversation we’d had since last night on the couch. I kind of loved him for it, to be honest. He was helping me see the strength in what I’d gone through rather than the weakness.
“They are everywhere. I have scars in places you haven’t seen. When I said the entire left side of my body was mangled, that wasn’t an
